Tuesday 18 January 2011

WORMS, YOUR HONOUR.

It's all very interesting, in a morality play sort of fashion; eminent QC and peer of the Realm, Lord John Taylor of Warwick at  Southwark  Court.
"....shitdrops keep falling on my head..."

and eminent QC and peer of the Realm, Lord Peter Goldsmith,

I know nothing, I am just a lawyer. Stupid. An imbecile.

at the Chilcott IraqFest.

Taylor, facing jail for false accounting in relation to his expenses, says that somebody told him it was alright, even if it was wrong, for him to invent a second home and claim for its upkeep and his travel to and from it, even though he didn't live there and therefore didn't go to it. He fell, he claims, among noble thieves, and who can doubt it;  Lord So-and-So told me it was alright, he bleats, through his own QC. And I'm only a lawyer and a QC myself, how'm I supposed to tell the difference between right and wrong?  If someone tells me something's legal, that's good enough for me. And another thing, I gave up a promising career, as a pisspoor lawyer, to come and work here for the Tory party without any wages;  they forced me to do it, give up being a lawyer and become a thief, I had no choice, why shouldn't I claim for something  I'm not entitled to; it's not as though I had any form of income, apart from the broadcasting and journalism. Lord John also told reporters that he had been living in the West Midlands, caring for his sick mother, when, in fact, she had been dead for six years. How'm I supposed to know when my mother's dead or alive, I'm only an eminent QC? His Not Guilty plea really does beggar belief.

If Taylor had any sense he would throw himself on the mercy of the Court or plead insanity; dissembling badly, like the rotten lawyer he is,  will see him inside;  the first black peer, in jail,  Jesus fucking wept, what a legacy, a dirty footnote in political history, a vindication,  they will insist,  of all who damned his blackness in Cheltenham, years ago, called him coon and wog, unfit -  his friends, in the Nasty Party. There is a position from which one can say Serve him right, up his own arse, Uncle Tom-ing, what does he expect from the Establishment but that if there's someone to be thrown to the wolves, it'll be him, Darky. A wider, better-tempered view would be that doubtless many deserve to be in Taylor's position, and aren't, and that his scapegoating is deliberate and will assist those bent on niggering their fellows, just like they always did.  I knew Taylor was  a fool within ten seconds of meeting him, so would anyone;  lawyer, doctor, banker and politician fools, though,  tend, normally, to get away with their foolishness, Taylor, in his rush to be Inside, hadn't realised that even first class  fools play with a deck stacked against the  second class likes of him. He's threatening to robustly question his fellow thieving peer, the one who told him it was OK to steal from the taxpayer, but who now denies saying any such thing,  should be interesting, peers and probably lawyers, falling out. Odd, how the same culture which permits Mr and Mrs Kinnock to sign-in to the Euro parliament  for two minutes, whilst the taxi is waiting outside to ferry them to a cheap flight home, for which they will claim an expensive, full-price reimbursement,  the rotten slags, also, out of the blue,  forbids poor Lord Taylor from claiming  a tiny fraction of what the Kinnocks so eagerly troughed.

Rather less pathos attaches itself to Blair's legal bumboy, Goldsmith, former Attorney General and now million pounds a year solicitor, barrister, advocat, member of an international lawyers' cartel, desperately trying to wash his hands of his former mentor, Tony Blair.  He kept me on the outside, whines Goldsmith, I didn't know what was going on.  How was I to know? If I had known what was going to happen I never would have said it's OK,  legally, for two members to defy the rest of the United Nations and just go marching into another country and steal everything and kill hundreds of thousands and torture people to death. Of course I wouldn't. I'm a lawyer for goodness sake. I guess I was just too trusting. I mean, I knew Tony, and he made me Attorney General, even though I was rubbish, and because of that, now I'm earning all this Hoon-money. And I definitely don't want to lose it, And so if the Enquiry, or anybody, really, wants me to say that Tony Blair is a mad, lying, thieving bastard who misled the commons,  is congenitally estranged from the truth and who, with his arse-companion, Big Mad Al bi-curious Campbell, cooked up a whole massive fiction about Weapons and shit then that is what I'm gonna say, I'm a lawyer, after all.  I do so solemnly swear.


If this keeps up, poor Mr Blair may come to feel like a latterday General Pinochet, ill at ease in the UK,  fearful of arrest, his dreams, which should be so leisured and peaceful and Godly, fraught, instead, with visions of disgrace and shame and humiliation and prison, bless.

14 comments:

a young anglo-irish catholic said...

Well, quite so. Excellent, as ever.

Lord Taylor, sponsored by nice Mr Major, was not just shunned by the local Conservative voters.

Oh no.

He was kicked around the place by those nice Lib Dems, whose behaviour in local elections has been appalling for years.

I mean, if you were a nice middle England, Barbour-wearing Lib-dem voter, you'd have given Taylor a go wouldn't you? All the afirmative action stuff?

It's easy to be a tree-hugging social democrat and live in the whitest part of the UK...Then you see a Brum black man and you trying and hang him from the nearest lamp post.

Fucking middle class liberals.

[Note, am viewing this from 1992, not today...]

jgm2 said...

Aye, Blair might end up like Baby Doc Duvalier yet. 25 years out of the country and still having to answer questions every time he dares go home.

We can but hope.

Mustafa said...

They found a way to get the Nazis back from Argentina.
Watch out Tony.

mongoose said...

I don't know anything about the Uncle Tom except that your assessment of why he got his gong is exactly the sort of thing the bastards do. And, obviously, that being a lawyer, a QC, and a Tory, and an Uncle Tom, that he is therefore a fully paid-up arsewipe. What is now obvious is that Ms Agatha has a better grasp of the law than this idiot - or so he pretends. Only yesterday we were prattling about it. '"He didn't consider it dishonest, he didn't consider it misleading," the barrister told the court.' Indeed. Thanks for that. Pity the Poor Ignoramus. No, I think I'll not.

And if he had thought for just a bit longer than ten seconds, he would have foreseen that somewhere in London - laughing gently - is his prosecution Rumpole just waiting for the moment. He rises to his feet, scoffs gently and says "But, m'lud, the man is a QC! If he doesn't know..." By God, I bet he doesn't give evidence. They'd rip the bastard to shreds.

mongoose said...

And BTW I think that they really do think that they did no wrong. That being underpaid - or so they thought - that they were allowed to take all this shit, and have us pay for it. They thought they were entitled. And that is the fucking worst part of it. Thieving bastards were above the law, certainly above us.

call me ishmael said...

Baby Doc Blair, it has legs, I think.

That's right, the Toiletmen have been playing dirty for years, rotten fucking bastards, so this bachelor boy, Selwyn Froggat, they call him, who took Woolas to Court, was really taking the piss; mind you, he makes his living pimping for arabs, a kind of a house nigger to coke-crazed playboys, so Lord knows what he thinks constitutes decent behaviour.

Never mind that he's an arsehole, it was absolutely shocking and disgraceful, what happened to Taylor in Cheltenham, Torie and LibDemns, working together, even then.

Apart from Benjamin Zephania, the dreadlock poet, I can't think of a prominent and accepted black who isn't an utter prat, no more black, really, than I am; is there a more obnoxious bastard than Trevor Phillips, apart from Keith Vaz and Baroness Scotland, all admired for their very whiteness? Oh, there's Yasmin Alibhai Muslem, too, her son's a lawyer, but you probably know that, you should do, she is not reticent about the matter, horrible cow.

Not just ms agatha, mrs woar too, in matters judicial.

It's a Mrs Rumpole, in this case, and all the more wounding she will be; he should cop a plea, unless, like Mr Paul Burrell-Rock, he has an ace, in the hole, so to speak.

yardarm said...

An element of Blair would actually relish a trial; not the money grubbing, arselicking Murdoch part of his sheeny cheapjack character. No, the martyr bit; the ' scars on my back ', the God put an Ace up his sleeve Gladstonian element of this colossaly overpromoted mediocre ambulance chaser, who would see this as his Calvary.

" I gave the Iraqis and the Kosovo Albanians freedom and brought peace to Northern Ireland, therefore, why does thou forsake me oh public opinion ? "

In the limelight again; reminding the world what we lost when he handed over to the lump headed gurner and the washer mouthed trustfund twat. And he would see it as storing up house points for Judgement Day. The bastard would love every minute.

call me ishmael said...

It's a lovely thought, mr yardarm and well put but I suspect that he would run scared of whatever else might emerge, whatever Murdoch has on him, whatever is known or half-known about his personal life; I think once the bubble was pricked by charges it would do what bubbles do and we would see him in all his phony wretchedness, seeking exile, in the States or Saudi Arabia or some other shithole, him and Imelda, shrivelled and wasting in luxury but despised, like the Duke and Duchess of Windsor. Still, him and Mick Hucknall are mates, so not entirely a wasted life, Berlusconi the Pimp, him, too.

black hole sunset said...

As wholly repellent as he undoubtedly is, there is a disturbing undercurrent of lynch mob camaraderie - a concensus, no less - surrounding the downfall of Mr Taylor.

Whatever else might be his due, he doesn't deserve to stand with so few co-accused.

mongoose said...

The prat is testifying!

Woman on a Raft said...

Amen.

call me ishmael said...

I have met a few silks, Mr woar, and invariaby wondered about the whole system, I can see it with most of the law lords - they seem, most of them, exhaustively thoughtful and intelligent, even if over-conservative and disagreeable but with Imelda Blair, for instance, her obvious shallowness and stupidity must surely outweigh any experise she may have in her field.

I suppose it's possible that Taylor may achieve a Tommy Sheridanesque result from a pliable jury but his defence seems intellectually and ethically threadbare.

mongoose said...

Praise be, indeed, Mrs WOAR, and it has begun:

'During cross-examination he was asked by Helen Law, prosecuting, where he lived. "I physically lived in Ealing," he replied. "It was the only place I physically lived in, yes." Mr Justice Saunders, the trial judge, then said: "Residing means physically living, doesn't it, Lord Taylor?"'

Couldn't make it up, eh? Perhaps we will be treated to metaphysical living when the panto returns on Monday. "I reside upon the ethereal plane, m'lud." If he puts two pencils up his nose and his undies on his head, he may get away with it.

jjones said...

Bliar, Mandelson, Kinnock, Prescott, and the list goes on. What a deceitful, hypocritical bunch of scum we have elected, except in Mandelsons case, he just sucked his way into politics. Bliar left for the USA asap, Kinnock will not retire to Wales and Prescott in the Lords, well so he can change it from the inside. What a hight of hypocracy. We deserve the high crime, high unemployment, failing schools and NHS, pensioner poverty etc. We must be the dumbest electorate ever. Impossible to undervalue the scum we call politicians.