Friday, 24 July 2009



All these other MPs, they're all wankers, thundered glamourous pantomome dame, publisher, disc jockey, litigant, European property developer, writer, reality TV star and part-time MP, Mr George Gob, above.

Speaking on BBC TV's ever populist Approved Question Time where he shared a platform with Dame Shirley Death, Sir Clive Death, Mr Geoff Death and some intolerably mouthy, yakkety-yakking Tory bint, Comrade George claimed repeatedly that he was the dog's bollocks.

Y'see this beard? I grew this beard. For the People. This suit? This ridiculous pimp suit with the high fastening? I wear this suit for the People. Everything I do, I do it for the People. All the money which my parliamentary celebrity status enables me to hoover-up, I keep all that for a worthy cause, ie myself. The rest of them are all wankers. There is only I, George. I work day and night for the People. Apart from when I'm taking a well-earned break in my holiday home on the Costa del Slag or am unavoidably detained fighting Equality's battles in the Big Brother House.

Asked whether he thought MPs had too much holiday (half the year) Mr Gob joined and closed ranks with his erstwhile foes, grunting in his delightfully belligerent, See-You-Jimmy, Glasgow punk fashion, Fuck me, no, all of us here work our guts oot fer youse ungrateful bastards. Me and Geoff Hoon, working our balls off, day and night. You know in the rough and tumble and hurly burly of parliamentary life it is often forgotten that members have far more in common with each other than they do with you lot. I may not agree with Geoff Hoon being a vile warmongering bastard, a cheap shit and a man witout an ounce of decency but, for fucks sake, if you start cutting his holidays next thing is you'll be cutting mines. Vote Respect. Vote Galloway. The Establishment's man of the People. (sings) There's no business like Showbusiness, like no business I know......
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The Dyer's Garden said...

You must admit Galloway could earn a lot more money a afford a great deal more leisure if he chose a more palatable set of ideas. Supreme vanity is the real driving force here, surely, not the cheap venality we see in so many of his colleagues.

call me ishmael said...

Yes, Narcissus, big time, as we say. Sheridan is exactly the same, must be something in the water, here, in Scotland, best part of England.

Dick the Prick said...

Fucking useless in a crisis.