In a controversial move, outgoing English premier, Gordon Snot, is set to pardon large numbers of serial criminals when he leaves office shortly. But not shortly enough.
" EVERYBODY'S INNOCENT.
It is in the finest traditions of the White House, which I have been proud to occupy these last thirteen years, that I controversially pardon anyone who has the dirt on me, proclaimed the babbling lunatic in his traditional Easter address.
Now is not the time for blame, fuck me, no. Instead we must rebuild the nation's faith by letting everybody off Scot-free, otherwise the jails would be bursting with perfectly innocent warmongers, money-launderers, pedarasts, drug addicts, blackmailers and embezzlers, indeed, the whole of the house of commons, the media, business and the church would be behind bars. And who would run the country then?
on y soit qui mal y pense
trans: nobody gets any jail time, nobody.