I may have aged, but I am even more important now that I have driven the Prime Minister out of office and yeere I am standing outside the closed door of Number 10.
The nation is disappointed, look you.
Where was the humility?
Where were the tears?
We wanted remorse.
We wanted apologies.
You would think he had an overwhelming mandate from the British people to lead the country out of Europe, the way he carries on, and, talking of Carrie, she was lined up outside Number 10 during The Speech, with the latest Johnson Minor strapped to yer chest - in our Programme we have some archive footage of the Prime Minister with his proper wife of 20 yeeers before he started having Ugandan discussions with Ms Symonds.
And I am yeere to tell the nation that the Conservative Parliamentary Party don't like being called a herd. The tone stinks. We have rounded up some oardinary people who are giving their oardinary views that the Prime Minister has let the nation down and we will show you pictures of Conservatives who may or may not stand for the leadership of the Parliamentary Conservative Party and I have yeere BBC commentators who are not as wonderful as I yam, but will do to fill a few hours on this historic afternoon when the Prime Minister resigned, but not reelly and we at the BBC will do our best to ensure for the good of the nation that he goes as soon as possible .
I am being Huw Welshman, short, belligerent and reporting yeere from the street outside the closed door of 10, Downing Street. Good Day to all our viewers who have joined us yeere today to celebrate our victory.
13 comments:
he smugness is indeed quite sick-making.
If the Tories didn't know, they know now.
Boris's problem is that he is likely bankrupt. I've lost count of the wives/mistresses/kids he has to support. Given he doesn't have a leg to stand on, they would have, and would still be, bleeding him dry. This make him vulnerable to all sorts of shit.
Its like his folk hero Churchill, who entered WW2 bankrupt, but ended the war a wealthy man. Talk about having a good war.
I remember a piece Boris penned in the Spectator when he was editor. He waxed lyrical about reclining on his chaise longue in his office having "hot buttered crumpets" - what he meant was "hot buttered crumpet".
Ah, Gentlemen, kicking the old bugger while he's down? Mind you, I've always thought that's the safest and most efficient way to go about kicking someone - they are on the floor, so you get a good swing on the level, without tricky upward angles, and they are less likely to be in a position to get in some retaliatory kicking. Although they could grab your ankle and heave you over. I wouldn't put that past him - I just can't see him drooping quietly and sadly on the back benches, like Theresa May-Footwear does.
He'll be a big miss - he contributed so hugely to the mirth of the nation, he did indeed Deliver Us From Europe, thus confounding their politics and frustrating their knavish tricks, and he kept the Scots in their box, as the National Anthem briefly had it: "May he sedition hush, and like a torrent rush, Rebellious Scots to crush!" He even slowed down the spread of the Plague by Lockdown measures, until the nation could be vaccinated. We see covid roaring around the land now - fortunately without the direst consequences, by and large - although I learned on the morning news that a part of my local hospital has been closed due to Covid.
Sounds like you are having a hot flush, Mrs I?
The man was, is and always will be an overly privileged cunt. Has never known what it’s like to lose, at anything. Been protected from the vagaries of struggling to pay the mortgage or ‘leccy bill, never wanted for anything from parents who’ve never said no. He’s never gained skills or experiences or had to stand on his own two feet and cannot understand why others don’t see the world as he does. He, like many in politics believe that extreme wealth is a result of intelligence, when it is more likely a result of psychopathy and complete and utter disdain for the little people who produce that wealth through manual labour.
Although pleased to see him fall I can’t help but think it’s the man behind the curtain, the bankers, Globocorp and security services, who’ve decided Boris had to go. There’ll be another useful idiot along just shortly.
In other words, mr inmate, a typical establishment Tory.
I like your point - folk are proud of their wealth or their intelligence as though it had anything to do with them, whereas, for example, had they been starved of oxygen at birth, it would have been a very different hand the life lottery dealt them. Or they might have had blue eyes instead of brown.
I think a typical politician, no matter the colour of tie or rosette. Sure there’s the odd one who isn’t connected by family or university but they’ll never see the levers of power. Privilege, another word for incompetence, is the cancer at the heart of mediaminster. Burn it down, all of it, with Fire.
Pretty much spot-on with your analysis, mr inmate, but I'd hesitate to endorse your incendiary solution.They'd only pop up again, somewhere else. Whoever you vote for, the politicians always get in.
Now that Snake Gove, he seems to be a bit of an outsider - but I don't fancy his chances.
And as for Sunak - did you see his video, declaring his interest in the top job? All that time sitting on the front bench next to Boris, then running off to make videos.
Yes mrs I, petty vomit inducing that sunak video, he produced the video in December 2021. Had anyone heard of Sunak before 2019, he’s a WEF placeman like Macron, if I was a betting man my money would be on him.
Fire it works, kills most things, praps not the blair thing, who btw has started his comeback with his re-set Britain ‘movement’ with the drunken, addicted, pornographer in chief as the media guru. Did you see Campbell on QT threatening Tim Stanley; “the last person to say things like that regretted it” who’s that then Alistair? David Kelly.
I hate to say it, but its likely Sunak. He has the suits, the teeth and a rich wife. His downside is that he's the wrong sort of chap (wink, wink) and I'm not convinced the Tory party is racially neutral. I can't see any alternative. BTW I think the boy Sunak would be a disaster.
Sue Ellen Braverman is who we need to win Mr Mike, a re-incarnation of the mad Fatcher, only brown, another Lawyer - first kill all the lawyers - she’s ready to send the dinghy surfers to Rawanda, shoot to kill protesters, wants small but powerful govament, war with mad Vlad, low taxation. She might take us back to the glory days of the seventies n eighties, three day weeks, blackouts, flying pickets, food rationing, maybe the new people will wake up to a new reality.
But yes, it’ll be Sunak.
Those who wield the knife, mr mike, do not get to wear the crown. And also, the "not one of us" argument tends to say that Sunak won't. And what has he shown of any calibre or note except to marry well? Unfortunately, I think we suffer from the lightweight syndrome. People with heft and calibre now do not think of public service in the way that folk without cash but with brain thought about it: Atlee or Wilson or Thatcher or Bevan or Heath or Castle, these poeple believed something whether you agreed or not, it was still true to them and they tried in a true-hearted way to do something. That is lost now to the swinehood of the twatterstorm.
yes, mr inmate, "child of the british empire" sue-ella bravo-two-zero is so gung-ho she makes prickli patel look like a cuddly corbynesque koala bear - but the baker is backing the ambitious attorney general, so one supposes that, in the teeth of a nascent neo-liberal plot to rejoin the eu blood-mineral emporium, she will prove a rock-solid brexit-babe.
fortunately, one person who will not be shuffled from the cia-pack into the prime monstership, is wallace-the-warmonger, who would certainly embroil us in a never-ending war against russia, and in the process, not only decimate every last european economy - including that of the uk - but probably make boris jobsgone appear reasonably competent.
in fact, warface, "bat-outta-hell" patel, michael "jackson" gove, steve "brexit" baker, tobias hellwood, matt randycock, mark "hypocrite" harper, kwasi "quickie" kwarteng, esther "universal debit" mcvey, and kurt "karate kid" raab have all had the brains not to take the helm of a multiply holed economy which is about to tank.
i agree that, as an upper-class indian-briton with one welly in new delhi, the ineffectual fishi numac may well, in common with his russophile indian cousins, wish to avoid senseless self-destructive war against russia, however - given that shifty shapps's a career-crook, nodding zahawi's an archer-stabled crook, tom black-hat's a cia-snake, penis-wise mordaunt's a pro-war navy puppet, savage jabit's a sado-psychopathic authoritarian, and hunt's well...just a smouldering cia-blunt - then for me there's now only one possible candidate for uk prime minister: the yoruba-hacker-princess, kemi badknickers, whose election to the tottering tory-leadership - as a black christian conservative, confirmed opponent of gay-marriage, trasher of 'critical race theory', and pragmatic brexiteer - would blithely flip-the-bird to a historically male-addicted labour party and - in light of that regressive institution's recidivist failure ever to elect a white woman as chief, let alone a black one - also show up the pseudo-opposition's cia-subsidized pseudo-socialists for the brutish bunch of knuckle-dragging cro-magnon cuntheads they truly are.
Post a Comment