Wednesday, 20 October 2010


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This is Sarah Tits for the BBC and I dunno who the fuck this git is behind me but, really, I mean, can't the police just kill him, he's wrecking the shot, what's the point of them having all those fucking machine guns if I have to put up with this shit? I'm joined, anyway,  by Mr Derek Gob of the think tank, Gobbo.  Derek Gobb, what's your take on this, the cuts and everything?

Thanks,  Sarah. Not hard enough, not deep enough, too slow, lazy bastards, welfare cushion, breed like fucking rabbits, wealth creators, too much tax, too much red tape, too much rules, too much healthansafety, dead hand of the state, niggers out, niggers out, out, out, out. Burn the council houses. A good start but not hard enough, Death to the poor.

That was Derek Gobb, there, for us, of the thinktank, Gobbo. Mr Gobb is one of the spunkfaced zombie chancellor, George Sneer's, seven wise but loony men which meets periodically to review the economy. And  for a group wank over each other.

And I'm joined now by Straight Simon Warts of the DogMurdering and ShitEating Alliance, the LibDems to you and I, Simon Warts, welcome and what's your view, it's gonna hit the poor hardest, innit, and nobody'll ever vote for your shower of shite again, will they, and you're an arse bandit, too

Well, actually Sarah, this is the fairest budget in history

You what? Fairest budget in history?

No. really, if it wasn't for me

and the party I deputy lead,  those Tory publicschoolboy fags would've shit all over everybody, well, every poor body. As  it is, thanks to the coalition, we're both doing it. And very satisfying it is too, wanna sniff my kecks? No? Not your thing?

That was Straight Simon Warts, the horriblest, horrible  bastard in public life.......

If I might just remind viewers that the fairness thing may well not happen now but only when people have been thrown out of their homes, studied for and paid for degrees whilst sleeping in allotment sheds, supporting themselves by prostitution and having applied for imaginary jobs which the private sector hasn't been able to provide on account of the country having been in a deep depression for ten years. Then it will all be fair, for everybody, sleeping rough, roasting mice on their shitfires, watching the dark, clutching sharpened sticks, just like stanislav said. And it'll all be Gordon Brown's fault, Christ, I hate poofs.

As I said, Straight Simon Hughes there for the Coalition, the horriblest horrible bastard in public life.
Back now to the studio, where Robert Bisto and Stephanie Fucks name the winners ( Osborne's friends) and the losers ( everybody else, even the smug gits who think they are in the clear.)


Agatha said...

Just doesn't take a good photo, does he, that Vote-for-the Straight-Choice.
Really don't care about people's sexual orientation, just don't like being lied to.

mongoose said...

Hughes is the worst of them. The worst of them all. I look forward to his own Dogshooter's epiphany. Many contacts, I am sure, among the lumberjacks.

black hole sunset said...

Those warts ... they're surprisingly common, amongst his type. Viral too. Coincidence?

call me ishmael said...

Don't know if he's a practising shit-eater, Hughes, gay, bi-curious young lawyer, no sensayuma, seeks arseolemate - but as he says himself, in an effort to refute his gay outing, he has had sexual relationships with both men and women, so there, bollocks, I'm not gay. Or not only gay; maybe the warts are genital, too. I hope so. I detest so-called bi-sexuals, and not just on grounds of public health, but for the ongoing safety of the tribe. I would put them out on the mountainside, for Death's HarvestHome.

That Straight Simon is such a contemptible, shifty, devious piece of shit politically, is entirely unsurprising. One would wish a pox on him, but he probably has one. At least one.