Thursday, 20 May 2010



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It is my commitment to socialist values - and to appearing on telly with comrades like the feminist, Peter Stringpenis - which makes me the outstanding candidate to lead this great party, this great nation, this great audience. People want to watch better late-night telly and I'm just the person not to give it to them. If people vote for me, I can guarantee that I will be on all channels, waving my arms around, tongue-tied and giggling, like a fucking ignoramus.

Twenty years I have run my constituency and it's now worse than ever - poorer, dirtier and more violent;  that's the sort of leadership I can offer the viewers.

Vote Lard for a Britain fair to clapped-out  career politicians and social climbers.


Oldrightie said...

She is also the Queen of Jamaica and rules with full regal majesty. Socialist? No, grasper.

Anonymous said...

I would just like to say thanks for not showing any more of the fat champaigne socialists photo.

Dick the Prick said...

It never ceases to amaze me how completely isolated from reality these fuck pigs are. Even to the least self aware individual there must exist some modicum of self knowledge, of comparison with others and the realisation, somewhere, however fleeting that their capacity is wanting, their ability less efficient but no - in New Labour just being a gobby, opinionated arsehole is to be over qualified. Fucking helllski.

mongoose said...

It is great fun. Well, it would be great fun if it wasn't actually true. Perhaps it's a sophisticated spoof to boost her hourly rate of a Thursday night, the horrible, fucking bastard. I may have to tune in, just one more time, to watch her get a good hiding.

Of the fucking vilenesses of the last three decades, the destruction of education is the worst. This horrible old sow contemptuously educates her offspring insulated from the horrors she so vehemently supported. Not for her little babies the knives and body scanners of the inner city comprehensives. Not for her babies the shit and stupidity of SAT-driven mediocrity. Oh no. How do they sleep? What rationalisation do they have to make to look in the mirror in the morning?

I hope they elect the craven, hypocritical, ghastly fucker. It would make good telly while the country burns.

call me ishmael said...

And you used to be such a nice, liberal sort of bloke, mr m, with a small ell.

mongoose said...

I still am, Mr Ishmael, but we are the last, and are being sorely tested. This last week has been Pythonesque in its madness.

And, in mitigation, my children are small and so I care v much about education. The expenses thieving is so secondary. The cant of Marxist Labour luvvies putting their kids into a gentle safety they deny my kids is a vileness too far.

Abbot will have to climb the steps. "Good people of England, I come here to die a deceitful, craven, cowardly piece of crap."

call me ishmael said...

The darker side of this manouvre is that the one Old Labour candidate, McDonnell, untouched by Blair-Brownism, may be squeezed-out by Abbott's standing. Whether or not one agrees with him he is a decent man and not part of the troughing machine, liable, if allowed, to give Balls and the others a good kicking and in so doing remind NewLabour just how far it has sunk. Ms Lard, if she has her way, will stop all that and instead burble breathlessly and pointlessly about racism and white male supremacy and maybe increase her teevee fees.

Regulars here will be in no doubt about the contempt in which Abbott is held, nor the scorn felt for her schooling choices. What was that, Show me someone who's not a parasite and I'll go out and say a prayer for him.

And here, in the North, these visions have kept me up, past the dawn. Good morning and Good night.