Sunday 3 July 2022

The Sunday Ishmael: 3/07/2022

Five sexy Tories and a financially outrageous McFuckery.
 (this year,so far, that is)
 
Introducing this round-up of this year's sexy Tories, let's look back to former Tory MP, fun Charlie Elphicke, who received a two year sentence of imprisonment in September 2020 for three sexual assaults, during which he asked one of his victims for bondage and sex, before kissing her and groping her breast before chasing her around his home, chanting: “I’m a naughty Tory.” Just got to admire your style, Charlie. Then there's Romantic Rob Roberts, stripped of the Tory whip last year, suspended for 12 weeks and sitting as an Independent having resisted Jacob Rees-Mogg's urging to "do the honourable thing" for making repeated and unwanted advances to a man. He apologised, whilst insisting his motivation was romantic, not sexual. He remains a closet Tory.
Onto this year's crop:
  1. On the 2 April, David Warburton, Tory MP for Somerton and Frome, was suspended  after a series of allegations relating to sexual harassment and cocaine use. A investigation by Westminster’s independent complaints and grievance scheme is continuing.
  2.  Imran Ahmad Khan, Tory MP for Wakefield, was found guilty of sexually assaulting a 15-year-old boy after plying him with alcohol at a party in 2008. His resignation on 28 April gave his constituency to Labour in a by-election on 23 June.
  3. Tractor-porn-boy  Neil Parish, Tory MP for Tiverton and Honiton, resigned his seat after being outed for twice watching internet porn on his phone in the House of Commons chamber. The resulting by-election gave his constituency to the Liberal Democrats on 23 June.
  4. On the 17th May an unnamed Tory MP was arrested on charges of rape and other sexual offences. The MP, currently remanded on bail is ordered to stay away from Westminster while the Metropolitan police investigation continues. 
  5. And on the 30th June Chris Pincher, the Tory deputy chief whip, resigned after having “embarrassed myself and other people” by drunkenly groping two men at a private club. It is the second time Pincher has resigned from the whips’ office, having previously stood down as part of the October 2017 sexual misconduct scandal, after reportedly making an unwanted pass at Alex Story. An investigation into his conduct has been launched, following 6 fresh allegations. We are told (mainly by Dom Cummings) that Boris, being a bit of a pork swordsman himself, albeit in the field of fragrant delights, thinks all this hilariously funny; allegedly saying "He's handsy - Pincher by name, Pincher by nature" before re-appointing him as Deputy Chief Whip on the 8th February 2022.
Is it the heady aphrodisiac of power that leads all these Tories into unconsidered and unwise sexual behaviours? Do they imagine they are desirable sexual partners? Or do they just not know how to go about considerately asking for a date? You know - "can I buy you a coffee" rather than going straight for the groin?  Sasha Swire, wife of then Tory MP,  Sir Hugo Swire, has informed the nation that David Cameron told her that her perfume made him want to push her "into the bushes and give you one". Subtle, David.
 
 What do they teach them in these public schools? 
 
It is said that scandals involving Tories are always about sex, whereas Labour scandals are about money. And now, it seems, the Scottish National Party scandals are about both sex and money, although not necessarily at the same time. Last week  cheery, chubby, bald Patrick Grady made it into these pages for stroking an unwilling teenager on his staff. This week we bring you another McFuckup, this time of a financial nature. Basically, the former SNP MP for Glasgow East, Natalie McGarry, has stolen a total of £24,635 from charities for which she was treasurer. She is just starting an 18 month prison sentence. Good thing that one of the charities to whose funds she helped herself is  Positive Prison, Positive Future.  
Honest, not invent.
 
Maybe this is why Gnasher is hell-bent on finagling a second independence referendum, a scant 8 years since the last one. She'll keep us at it until we get the right answer. And she will tell us what that is. She is bent on blaming inflation, covid and the national health service crisis on Westminster, and, in so doing, distract from the massive fuck-up that is the SNP, its handling of the devolved economy and its dodgy MPs. Madame le Gnasher has set the 19th October 2023 for the referendum. If she cannot legally hold a referendum, she will hold an election when the SNP will stand on only one issue - independence - and if everyone votes SNP, take that as a referendum. 1 in 18 people living in Scotland is currently suffering from Covid. 100 in 100 people living in Scotland are currently suffering from Gnasher.
 
Moving rapidly on, before I burst into tears; to American news, those stone-mad religious fanatics seem to have decided that its female population should undertake the useful role of being incubators, irrespective of any personal wishes. This will then achieve a surplus of unwanted babies which can be re-assigned to happy, stable, loving male couples, thus avoiding the need for chaps to have anything to do with women. Other than inseminating them and running away fast.
This has caused quite the furore in the United Kingdom, where commentators are outraged at American conduct of its own affairs and management of its own population, whilst remaining indifferent to the situation in our own country. In Northern Ireland, despite abortion having been decriminalised in October 2019, (I know! 2019!) provision for abortion was not made, thus requiring unwillingly pregnant women to sort it out for themselves or travel to England for the necessary health care. In July 2021, the Secretary of State for Northern Ireland issued a direction to the Department of Health, the Minister for Health, the Health and Social Care Board, and to the First and Deputy First Minister, to “commission and make abortion services available in Northern Ireland as soon as possible, and no later than 31 March 2022”. A week before the deadline, the Northern Ireland Secretary stated that it was “increasingly clear” that the Northern Ireland Department of Health was not going to ensure abortion and post abortion care was available in Northern Ireland by the end of March. He added that he was left with “no choice but to prepare work on further Regulations to ensure services are commissioned […] as soon as is reasonably practicable” following the Northern Ireland Assembly election in May 2022.
Sophie attempted to interview General Mark Milley this morning on the Not the Sophie Raworth Show.
He is American. The Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, he is the highest-ranking officer in the United States Armed Forces and, god help us, the principal military advisor to POTUS, the Secretary of Defence, the National Security Council and the Homeland Security Council. All America outfits. Not Britain. Yet.
"Well,little lady, I cannot answer that question"
 
But, General.....
I have told you that I cannot answer that question. That is private. That is for me and my counterpart. 
Him speaking American, I had a moment's incomprehension whilst I tried to work out what a counterfart was. He narrowed his piggy little eyes and barked out his pre-prepared, well rehearsed answers, his green baseball cap perched on his fat, frightening, brutal, jowly, trap-mouthed  boar head like a pea on a bowling ball. 
Made one appreciate our subtle, elegant, well mannered, deferential, English jolly good chaps - or was that a Cold War Alec Guinness film?
Talking of which......... 
Wot's on Telly?

Tosh, that's what. A pretty thin idea, stre-e-e-etched out over god knows how many episodes - (I've watched 3 so far), and adorned with a tricksy workaround of the indisputable fact that, to ordinary human beings, staring at lines of computer code is deeply, deeply boring. Watching a bunch of geeky actors staring at computer code is coma-inducing. The protagonist's mind palace (thanks, Mark Gatiss' Sherlock, unaccredited in the Undeclared Rip-Off) is a place of gymnastic, physical obstacles, including lifting a man-hole cover (them's heavy, man) which the frail little protagonist must negotiate; all this work-out shite being an external metaphor for sitting down and key-boarding. If you are attempting to engage with this lot after your accustomed half bot. of Mad Fish Sauvignon Blanc (I like the name, but prefer the Marlborough Sauvignon, which is just heaven in a cold glass), then you will have some difficulty in understanding the sequence in which the protagonist traverses a fairground, breaks into a beach hut and climbs through the ceiling, which morphs into ..... and onandonandon.

Anyway, it seems that Russia and Britain are engaged in a cyber war. We're two years in the future, Covid is still a problem,  we have a black Prime Minister - Adrian Lester is chillingly brilliant as the billionaire Tory who overthrew Boris (what could Peter Kosminsky be hinting at?) and the Ukraine War is a thing of the past. I did like the device that Russian characters speak to each other in Russian and we find out what they are saying through English subtitles. Being able to read and occasionally being a little fuzzy of hearing, I like subtitles, which is why I deplored the streamed version going out without subtitles. And isn't it much better to hear the language rather than have the actors indicate they are talking foreign to their foreign mates by speaking their lines in comedy heavily-accented English, like 'Allo, 'Allo. That was back when all foreign was funny to true-blooded English men who couldn't read subtitles. Now all foreign is just frightening.

That was about all I liked. Granted, I haven't seen the whole thing, but I could not suspend my disbelief when Vadim, the spotty and geeky Russian hero, code-embeds a meet-up message to his geeky erstwhile pash, Saara, who just happened to start work at GCHQ on the day of the cyber-attack and he just happens to have spotted her on a spy screen in Moscow (oh, for fuck's sake) and - AND his scary bosses just let him go to the meet-up to warn the West that another cyber attack is imminent. Oh, do grow up. 

Anyway, there's a real problem going on with Saara. She is narrow. Her head is wider than her shoulders. She is dreadfully, dreadfully thin. All bones - long, thin, delicate bones with absolutely no meat on them at all. Think chicken feet. 

She is what clinicians working with anorexics would call a trigger. She comes from a normal-looking British Muslim family who quite clearly have enjoyed a fair old share of dahl and chapattis in their time - suicided dad was quite stocky, mum is a round bundle, sister a chubbily massively preggers young woman. But Saara inspires one with a desire to spoon feed her a good gravy dinner. The show may get around to addressing her anorexia. There's a scene in the GCHQ canteen where all the clever fellows wot listen to lies and pump out their own go for their pie and chips, and our girl has a green apple on a white plate on a tray for her lunch. She explains to the older gentleman whose solitary lunch she has invaded that she doesn't eat meat because she's a Muslim and that she doesn't like vegetables. Now that's a thin story - I've enjoyed many a meat and spinach balti down the Ladypool Road that deffo had meat in it. The elderly gent, whimsically played by Sir Mark Rylance, doesn't challenge her thin story, but later takes her for a picnic in the ruinous old GCHQ building and provides her with a sandwich carefully prepared to pander to her dietary preferences, and what does she do with it? Waves it about in the air before restoring it to the plate. There's a story line waiting to be unfolded here - suicided dad, anorexic daughter - can't wait. 

Saara has already corrupted Vadim's sexual preferences - they were at University together, where he would moodily sketch her instead of paying attention to the lecture - well, he didn't need to, on account of being brilliant and all that; and when he finds himself back in Moscow against his will because Putin recalled all Russians from foreign parts (yes, Putin, it's 2024 and Putin is still in charge), he takes up with an anorexic widow, who he moodily sketches and whose cooking is so diabolical that neither of them can eat it, just summoning enough energy for a bit of under-the-blankets action and a trip to the zoo, where healthily-nourished predators gaze condescendingly on the emaciated forms of Vadim and his gloomy widow. Would you eat that? Nah, mate, break your teeth on all those bones. 

The zoo? The widow has a female child, whom Vadim carries around on his shoulders like a trophy girlfriend at Glasto. Does anyone else find that a bit creepy?  So, the zoo - another metaphor, I suppose, for Russian aggression. And if you didn't catch that, Vadim attends a lecture given by a swivel-eyed loon, who is working up a pitch of enthusiasm for all this cyber warfare, chaos, confusion and despair that will soften the West in preparation for the declaration of open war. By Russia on the West. No, really.

You can catch The Undeclared War on Channel 4 or on All 4. Will I bother with any more episodes? Hell, yes - I need to find out if Saara is hospitalised for her eating disorder - so brave of them to tackle these mental health issues in the middle of an old-fashioned Cold War propaganda vehicle.

 Now Available

If you've missed a contribution from mr ishmael this week, look no further than  Ishmael’s Blues - which is now published, in both paperback and hardback editions; both editions are immediately available from lulu.com.  The paperback is also listed on amazon. Honest Not Invent and Vent Stack, the first two books in the sequence are also available from Lulu and Amazon. If you buy from Amazon, it would be nice if you could give a review on their website.

Ishmaelites wishing to buy a copy from lulu should follow these steps :

 Unless you’ve done this already, please register an account first, at lulu.com. This is advisable because otherwise paypal seems to think it's ok to charge in dollars, and they then apply their own conversion rate, which might put the price up slightly for a UK buyer. Once the new account is set up, follow one of the links below (to either paperback or hardback) or type "Ishmael’s Blues" into the Lulu Bookstore search box.  Click on the “show explicit content” tab, give the age verification box a date of birth such as 1 January 1960, and proceed. 

The book’s full title is "Ishmael’s Blues – further Chronicles of Ruin", and the cover you'll see is red with white titles and a picture of blogdog Buster retiring from the fray, cat gloating from a safe distance. The cover is the same for both editions.

Link for Hardcover :  https://tinyurl.com/je7nddfr

Link for Paperback : https://tinyurl.com/3jurrzux

At checkout, try WELCOME15 in the coupon box, which (for the moment) takes 15% off the price before postage.  If this code has expired by the time you reach this point, try a google search for "Lulu.com voucher code" and see what comes up.  

With the 15% voucher, PB (including delivery to a UK address) should be £16.84; HB £27.04.

 ...........................................................
Hetero Pride week. Endangered species.

 

29 comments:

Mike said...

It could be a bias in the data, as we maths geeks like to say: it could be politicians attracted to sex, or sex-maniacs attracted to politics? Who can say? But the two parts are sides of the same coin, or cheeks of the same arse.

In the good old days we had Mellor in his Chelsea strip rogering some slapper; Johnny underpants and Edwina - somehow I could never imagine Johnny with his hand down his own wife's knickers, but Edwina? Really? Please don't publish that pic of Edwina flashing her legs, EVER AGAIN! And Lord Archer denying everything, and the judge couldn't bring himself not to believe the testimony of the "fragrant" Lady Archer.

I'm old enough to remember to Profumo scandal; but Mandy had a sense of humour, and the young Christine was easy on the eye. But to bring it back to modern times, even then it was a cunning Russian plot.

mongoose said...

The other thing to remember though is that they all hang out at the HoC until all hours getting pissed on the taxpayer, and a great many of them are many miles indeed from err, bumping into their own Mr or Mrs MP. And so they are probably all at it. (And the Ginger Growler cannot be the only one teasing the boys with loose talk.) Vermin though will do what vermin do.



Mike said...

Just on cue, Edwina in the Filth-o-graph reminiscing that scandals were better when she was at it.

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2022/07/04/edwina-currie-1970s-80s-had-better-class-scandal/

mongoose said...

Was there any need for that, mr mike? Gratuitous cruelty is what it is.

TEst to be won in the morning! They're changing the game and saving Test cricket all on their lonesome. Whuuddathunkit?

Mike said...

Bairstow singlehandedly saves test cricket. Root is a great batsman, but he doesn't have Bairstow's balls.

mrs ishmael said...

mr mongoose said:"The other thing to remember though is that they all hang out at the HoC until all hours getting pissed on the taxpayer, and a great many of them are many miles indeed from err, bumping into their own Mr or Mrs MP. And so they are probably all at it"
They probably are all at it, and the thought that the country is governed by a bunch of drunks who spend their time hanging out in the "bars and knocking shops of Westminster" as mr ishmael had it, rather than paying attention to the business of the nation, is unpalatable and explains a lot about decision making in this country. The reason that this particular crew of sexy Tories has hit the headlines, though, is that their sexual activity is, on the face of it, illegal - in that it was non-consensual.

ultrapox said...

talking of unconscionably late abortions, i understand that sir keir squirmer is proudly confirming the labour party's ideological commitment to ending freedom-of-movement.

no shit...

with millions of ukrainian refugees poised to colonize the uk's golden-paved council compounds, did sir keir dreamer truly believe that a policy of open borders could ever prove a vote-winner? of course, in ethical terms, freedom-of-movement is the default standard to which we should always aspire, however, given our war-hung establishment's pumping predilection for embarking upon the very neo-imperialist adventures which actually precipitate mass-migration, such a policy would clearly constitute electoral suicide.

the laws of realpolitik dictate that, at any specified moment in history, we can enjoy either neo-colonial war or free movement, but never both.

maybe nato-to-the-core keir has not yet twigged that - tuned in cynical counterpoint to the carnage-catalysis of mi6 arming isis - it was in fact the humanitarian obliteration of libya and syria by his own neo-liberal mates which - together with that co-ordinated conflagration's collateral wave of migrant desperation - ultimately conspired to tip our eu membership referendum in favour of brexit?

meanwhile, boris de waffel jobsgone reckons that equipping ukrainian neo-nazis with the latest generation of anti-ruskie weaponry will incentivize cash-strapped britain to pay its taxes.

get real, guys

mongoose said...

This last bit might have done for him tonight, children. What larks. This is the last hurrah though. One last push to kill the NIP and Bojo's place in history will be secure.

mongoose said...

More importantly for the universe. Kelly Joe Phelps has died! Damn! A few months older than me. Let's hope that the bif fellow hasn't got my range yet.

mongoose said...

ANd just incase you think I have been bullshitting all these years about the Greenland Ice Cores. Four minutes is all that are needed to change the world.

Mike said...

Looks like an "Et Tu Brute" moment. In an earlier thread I forecast the Ides of March. I was out by a few months. The fat fucker held on and helped to further destroy Ukraine in the process. That will be his legacy: not quite up to Madeleine Albright levels, so far, but he was trying. It might yet exceed her numbers. I'll make a further forecast: whatever comes next will be worse - I know, nobody ever believes worse is possible, but history keeps proving it is.

mrs ishmael said...

mr mongoose, I was a Geography A level student back in the last century and my earnest and dedicated geography teacher, Miss Fair, in addition to having us yomping all over Malham Tarn, told us all about the cyclical nature of Ice Ages interspersed with Warm periods. These things happen. God planned it so. Trouble is, we humans can thrive only within quite a narrow range of temperatures, so although climate change happens as regularly and cyclically as if the Earth is breathing, these changes will wreak havoc amongst our huddled masses - so, although of course I never thought you were bullshitting about the Ice Core science - we can't just shrug and say, so what, shit happens.

mrs ishmael said...

And, in other news, looks like Boris isn't giving in. He's filled his Cabinet vacancies with people wot like him.
PMQs soon...

ultrapox said...

mr mike, in a further well-oiled career-move, the fat fucker appears to be promoting other fat fuckers to fill the gaps at the top table...

and in unrelated news:


"lurpak, king of butters, has been spotted priced at £9.35 for a one kilo pack in iceland, and selling in sainsburys - online and in store - for £7.25 for a 750g tub."


yes, with his stock rising, the great tub of lard could yet survive until the summer-break...

the king of blubber/grease/blubbers* rules ok


[*add according to taste]

sir keir squeaker said...

indeed, mr ultrapox...

earlier, during prime minister's questions, i rhetorically grilled mr jobsgone by querying whether the country deserves better than the z-list cast of "nodding dogs" which currently perch precariously upon the government's front bench...

clearly of course, i should have referred to the right honourable members of mr jobsgone's cabinet as "nodding nato donkeys", but in the circumstances, didn't wish to undermine this country's blind participation in the first ukraine war, nor for that matter my own neo-imperialist position à propos the vanity-bloodbath - born of politically expedient russiaphobia - which we in this great parliament are necessarily prosecuting in pursuit of our big fat cia-sanctioned careers.

ultrapox said...

oh dear me...

prime minister's question-time:

pathetic political point-scoring in pursuit of parliamentary power

ultrapox said...

we are heading, mrs ishmael, for a government of all the fatties - but hopefully the deepening cost-of-living crisis - alternatively known as the motherfucker of all depressions - will soon resolve this problem with appropriate poetic aplomb

ultrapox said...

ah, you just can't beat the good old labour party, can you?

"nodding dogs": surely a nasty islamophobic sleight directed at the chancer-in-the-chancellery?

ultrapox said...

fortunately for sir keir tranquillizer, mr nodding zahawi is not an overly religious type, but reportedly, rather an ardent hippophile...

and so now this high-rider's got his hands firmly in the national till, one trusts that his nags will be assured a nice neo-conservative nosebag.

mongoose said...

Well, mrs i, if that is the case, we should looking for policies which increase global warming, should we not? The better to stave off the slaughter by cold about to fall upon our over-populated heads.

Boris appears to have fallen off his rocker but it is great entertainment.

ultrapox said...

by-the-way, sir keir...

is not the correct term for hatred of russian people "russophobia" - rather than "russiaphobia"...?

just saying...

still...russophobia, islamophobia, anti-semitism, niggaphobia, socialophobia, abbottophobia, corbynophobia, livingstonophobia, trumpophobia, toryophobia, farageophobia, leftyophobia, neo-imperialism, naziphilia, natophilia, snobbism, plebophobia, brexitophobia, and fully-fledged fascism are all alive, thriving and virulent in the cia-cocksucking labour party.

my god, i mean, judging by its on-going love-affair with the eu blood-mineral-emporium, labour's neo-colonial membership would probably vote to rejoin the british empire in a trice - and reinstate slavery to boot; at least ten million african tribespeople perished in the cia-choreographed horror which blossomed into the congolese genocide - and they were sacrificed purely in order to line the pockets of cannibill clinton's billionaire mining-mates with gold, cobalt, copper, coltan, diamonds, tantalum, tin, lithium, uranium, and oil - yet those ten million wasted black souls mean fuck-all to these pseudo-socialist cunts who now gratuitously infest the labour party.

clinton was also responsible for funding, and militarily assisting, the rpf-insurgency which was retrospectively camouflaged by the misattributed rwandan genocide, and yet the dirty rotten democrat party will never investigate his noxious neo-imperialist war-crimes - any more than the european union will ever hold to account corrupt former commissioner louis michel and his super-seedy son charles - currently president of the eu council - for their integral involvement in the systematic rape of congo's mineral resources.

progressives? these gut-turning gits have never progressed from the transatlantic slave-trade.

mrs ishmael said...

That's been an entertaining day in politics, folks. Boris is the gift that keeps on giving. And on and on and on. The BBC is getting quite cross with Boris as he just continues to refuse to give in and pack his bags. And the chutzpah of the man - sacking snake Gove! Did you see Boris' performance at the Integrity Committee? Getting to like him more and more, especially as he is sinking the Tory party in the eyes of the electorate.
On the off chance that he will change his mind overnight, who do you like as a successor?

ultrapox said...

crikey mrs ishmael, better buy some wellies quick:


"since 1880, the ocean began to rise briskly, climbing a total of 210 mm (8.3 in) through 2009 causing extensive erosion worldwide and costing billions.

sea level rose by 6 cm during the 19th century and 19 cm in the 20th century. evidence for this includes geological observations, the longest instrumental records and the observed rate of 20th century sea level rise. for example, geological observations indicate that during the last 2000 years, sea level change was small, with an average rate of only 0.0–0.2 mm per year. this compares to an average rate of 1.7 ± 0.5 mm per year for the 20th century. baart et al. - 2012 - show that it is important to account for the effect of the 18.6-year lunar nodal cycle before acceleration in sea level rise should be concluded. based on tide gauge data, the rate of global average sea level rise during the 20th century lies in the range 0.8 to 3.3 mm/yr, with an average rate of 1.8 mm/yr."



incidentally, apart from being inveterately corrupt war-mongers, the neo-liberal nutjobs who these days largely populate the british labour and us democrat parties - and who duplicitously dub themselves 'progressives' - are also incredibly, incredibly ignorant and stupid.

didn't they ever go to school?

well, in my most humble opinion, these poppycock promulgating 'progressives' need sending back to the classroom to learn to read, add-up, and have some common-fuckin'-sense beaten into them.

ultrapox said...

mrs ishmael, if boris jobsgone doesn't quit soon, he'll end up forming the new thames barrier.

my preferable candidates for conservative party leader are the three brexiteers:


prickli patel - brawn

steve baker - brains

andrea leadsom - commonsense-humanity


yeah, the butcher, the baker, and the candlestick-maker - all state-schooled and non-oxbridge, save for the baker, who completed a post-graduate course in cooking computer-code at st cross college, oxford.

mrs ishmael said...

What about this Sue-Ella? First one out of the starting gate. I take a bit of an interest in politics, but I confess this Tory-tottie had failed to register with me. She's called in aid her race credentials - "my parents came to this country with nothing and now look at me - Attorney General, soon to be Prime Minister Braverman"
But Sue-Ella? Sounds like a character from the Waltons.

Mike said...

Boris has fallen on his cock. The reality is that he was second rate, but all the alternatives are third rate.

What happens now is some puppet comes in, but reality is that the economy is fucked. The UK is facing not just recession, but depression.

mongoose said...

But so is just about everyone else, mr mike. And we are watching the death of the EU. That alone is going to cause massive and widespread economic disruption to the entire continent and beyond.

I don't think that the population at large do think like that, mrs i. We've reached a new nadir in political discourse wherein anybody who says anything with which a second person disagrees is immediately caalled a liar and a fraud. This is the model of discrediting one's opponents by the ad hominem that was first championed by the heroes of the left. It is not something of which they should be proud IMO, and I think the general bod in the street sees straight through it. It is much more important to the left to understand that Labou can never win an election again without getting Scotland back off the SNP. Some PR stitch up after a sneaky win and there will never be a glad socialist morning ever again.

I would not put it past Boris to stand in the leadership contest. He would certainly have a great chance of winning the popular round. That would pu the pigeon among the cats. He probably won't though but it would be fun to watch.

mrs ishmael said...

Boris is planning to re-marry Carrie at Chequers on the 30th July, which is why he has negotiated this delay in his resignation. Can't host a party at Chequers if you are not Prime Minister. The wedding invitations have gone out, so the nation's leadership issue will just have to wait.
Twelve years in the wilderness, mr mongoose, twelve years. Surely its our turn again? Would mr ishmael have deposed Gordon Brown had he known he was ushering in twelve years of Etonians?

mongoose said...

A majority of eighty and an extra 25-30 from boundary changes? No, mrs i, I am afraid that it's not going to be your turn again. And certainly not with the desperately tedious Captain Hindsight in charge. The man has the charisma of a soggy dumpling. The only way is if the Remoaners get their hands on the Tories and reverse or minimise Brexit - which is the plan, of course - and/or you have a decent leader. There is an outside chance, I suppose, of a hung parliament and a Lab/LD/SNP stitch up but the price will be the end of Labour forever, a reforming force never again. Is it worth it?