Wednesday 15 March 2023

Bread and Circuses: The Oscars

 I saw that film, the one that everyone thinks is wonderful and that got all the Oscars. Not only is it preposterous and juvenile, it is also boring. One of those where you say to yourself is it nearly over yet? that clock on the wall by the cinema screen - it just took five minutes to record a full half hour of elapsed time. Please God, is it nearly over yet? I'm not coming to t'pictures again. At least at home I can make a cup of tea or put something else on t'telly. Anything. 

Fresh, zany and bizarre, the critics said. Oh yes? The hot dog fingers. I rest my case. Or my tin of hot dogs. Hamlet, it isn't. Of course, they say loftily, it is all a metaphor. No, its not. There are some that think slam dunk action and a lot of noise is all you need in a film. They generally tend to be in the 14  to 18 age bracket.
All that prize giving and adulation was, of course, political, nowt to do with merit and everything to do with ethnicity. And the Struggle. Which, I would suggest, is racist. Or at least patronising, in the Johnsonian sense - if ever a man needed a quick rubdown with a house brick -
“Sir, a woman's preaching is like a dog's walking on his hind legs. It is not done well; but you are surprised to find it done at all.” ― Samuel Johnson.

As is the fuss about Ruth E Carter, costumier, getting her second Oscar for clothing design for  the film  Black Panther Wakanda Forever, another kiddie's action film with super heroes from the Marvel Cinematic Universe. I used to read Marvel Comics when I was a teenager. Just saying.
She may be able to make stunning frocks and have invented Afro-Futurism clothing design, but she's a bit shaky when she strays away from her area of excellence. I
n her Oscar acceptance speech, she asked  Chadwick Boseman to look after her mother, Mabel Carter, died age 101 of death, “this past week.” Boseman died in 2020 of cancer at 43.  “This film prepared me for this moment. Chadwick, please take care of mom.” For fuck's sake.

The reason I've selected this particular flake out of the whole circus of flakes is that, for her, everything has to be about being Black.  

 Carter thanked the Academy for “recognizing the superhero that is a Black woman,” she said. “She endures, she loves, she overcomes.” 


ultrapox said...

yes, i'd heard the yanks were developing a new range of state-of-the-art weapons: putin won't be laughing when that lands on him

Anonymous said...

Shock and Awe wouldn't even come close, mr ultrapox.


Bungalow Bill said...

Here lies untruth, Mrs I. We do it all the time, imagining that we are sovereign over ourselves and, therefore, over others and then finding that we are in utter disgrace. It's called the Fall, for want of a better word.

ultrapox said...

the russian president would indeed be awestruck by such a weapon, mr verge...

however, mr putin should consider himself most fortunate that the americans have not yet perfected the hypersonic version - because in the event of any attempted air-strike against him by the usa, russia's resultant technological edge would afford the kremlin sufficient time to launch a pre-emptive salvo of moustache-guided babushkas against the white house.

does she have vertical take-off and landing capability?

Anonymous said...

Aerodynamic stability might become a problem at those speeds with such a formidable unit, mr ultrapox. Putin can rest easy. (If Russia colonised Ethiopia, btw, would Vlad become Ras Putin?)

And in Truth Trumps Fiction news, try an image google search for Lizzo.


ultrapox said...

that lass lizzo is certainly armed with some mighty weapons, mr verge, and if she could get close enough to putin, could probably take him out with a classic double-mammy manœuvre - which would render all his martial arts skills useless...

nevertheless, in the heat of a conventional tactical exchange, i fear that lizzo would ultimately come out the loser - largely due to the sarmat nuclear missile which the president has stowed between his legs, and necessitates him receiving guests whilst seated at the far end of a very long table.

now, of course, establishing vlad's hypothetical title as ruler of ethiopia provides a conundrum most worthy and demanding of our attention...

and without in any manner wishing to infringe the boundaries of cultural appropriation, i believe the correct style would be jah ruski.