Tuesday 1 February 2011

A MESSAGE FROM THE GREAT DICTATOR.


I'M JUST LIKE YOU, REALLY I AM, I DO THE WASHING UP,
YOU'VE ALL SEEN ME DOING IT. WE'RE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER.
DO YOU PEOPLE HAVE BATHS, BY THE WAY, IN YOUR COUNCIL HOUSES?


You know, as I travel round the country, in my shirt-sleeves, telling lies to people, they all seem worried about what is happening in Egypt, what does it mean for them, their jobs, well, that's easy, pretty soon  a lot of them won't have any jobs, so no problem there.  But one of the things I say to people, to reassure them, is that the great difference between myself and  our good friend and stauch ally, Mr Hosni Mubarak,  is that he's not elected and neither am I. And another striking contrast is that his people are worried about the price of fuel and food and everything, really, and so are ours.  The Egyptians have very high levels of youth unemployment, whereas, here, in this country, so do we and the Egyptian security forces are encouraged to actually beat the citizens to death or shoot them, yet here, on the other hand, the Metropolitan police do exactly the same thing.  The Egyptians have elections it is true, that are rigged from start to finish, but we won't be having any of that nonsense until we manage to arrange things between Mr bin Clegg's and my own party in such a transparently fair and more equal way that we cannot lose. All in all, I think people can see quite clearly  that comparing me with Mr Mubarak is quite mistaken;  he is much more advanced a democrat than I.  For the time being.


 MR BIN CAMERON
AT A GATHERING OF THE WARLIKE AL-BULLINGDON TRIBE

10 comments:

yardarm said...

And when Dif Id Camer Houn is forced into exile in the golden boardrooms of the City who will become the Emir of Ruin ?

If no Plan B scuppers the Coalition of Shaitan will the fanatical Thatcherite Brotherhood seize control in a purist revolution ? Davies ? Surely William ' Mustapha Spad ' Hague is too discredited.

Or could the disciples of the discredited Brownattollah return ? Id El Milliband and Ed Ibn Bollocks ? Will it make a difference ? I doubt it.

Dick the Prick said...

It is vaguely amusing really. I know 100 folks have been killed for reasons which seem a bit casual but there could be a few sides to why/how/who did that shit and, in Ruin, 100 hardly registers on the Richter Scale. But the propensity of 'leaders' to do all they can to fuck about with elections is quite remarkable.

A rare modern day vignette, a tableux horribleau, when you find yourself agreeing with Charlie Falconer - the odious, imbecillic, sychophantic, bisexual, Blair cock sucking placeman - Prescott with 2 GCSEs as the 'Coarselition' just lob a futile referendum in with the only Tory policy that any of the cunts give a shit about - boundary changes.

Maybe some of the Tory grandees do actually give a shit about privatising the NHS, well, public services in general but I guess 9 out of 10 of the thick cunts could only give a shit about the 'independent' (don't make me fucking laugh) boundary commission.

Ah, politics, as the only Tory I worked for who was quite happy being a Tory - 'the dirties business there is'. Fuck em' and their heirs.

call me ishmael said...

Yes, that's right, I thought that about Falconer, too. Time we used another word for "leaders", Cameron and Lansley, lead me anywhere? No thank you. Leader is another word for Fuhrer, isn't it? More like it, in Cameron's case. Adolf did the equivalent of boundary changes, of identifying hate groups within. Man's a cunt, needs a punch in his inbred mutant face. Squarehead Ed, him too, what is the matter with him, why does he sound like he's speaking underwater, fucking freaks everywhere you look, as if Gordon Snot wasn't monster enough for one generation.

call me ishmael said...

It won't make a difference, mr y, but I guess an upheaval would see Labur back quite comfortably. Davis was the right choice for the Tories, back then, bin Cameron is just a slow-mo traincrash, not being Brown is not enough. Death to all of the infidels anyway, May the Prophet make shit of them.

mongoose said...

Coming to a life like yourn any day now is a "National Emergency". That's Fuhrerspeak for "don't need no fucking elections, AV or boundary changes, m'luds, thankee". Ayrab dictators and sundry vermin falling down everywhere and the bin Muzzis will be all over the world setting fire to it.

It is the right thing to do. Protecting the futures of hard-working families. Security of the Nation. Too fragile a recovery to risk. All Labour's fault. McDoom not even dead yet. Protecting jobs. Ours. Not Yours.

And you can see McClegg falling for it too. Dickhead.

lilith said...

Excellent Yardarm.

call me ishmael said...

Maybe an anti-strike, anti-protest UK Patriot Act, like Uncle Sam's. Hard to see how Obama can carry on without delivering his masters another war, the US economy is completely fucked, even on its own figures; equally hard to see how CallHimDave can carry these measures of his through, without an emergency of some sort; the alternative is an election, which he would lose, like the last one.

Time for sharpened sticks, maybe.

a young anglo-irish catholic said...

We ran out of money Mr I.

They say we're borrowing 10 percent of annual income, but it's far worse. The government can only tax up to 50 percent before the whole shooting match collapses.

So at £150bn or so of annual borrowing, it's really on the way to 20 percent.

It's as if I was earning £1000 a month and spending £1200. Not really sustainable.

Did you know that all the income tax and all the national insurance added together doesn't quite cover the cost of the NHS and Welfare state?

Inspector Gob, Wing Commander Harrier and the edukation system has to be paid for out of VAT and fuel tax and all that.

Terrifying.

a young anglo-irish catholic said...

Had to recommend you, under Heffer this evening.

Excellent stuff.

call me ishmael said...

Ypu'll be in a minority of one, over there. You wonder if there's any stopping Ruin, when you consider how many people worship Heffer, mr yaic, he does, though, seem to be getting an increasing amount of stick, the useless fat bastard.