RICH FOLKS IN THE NEWS.

 Downing Treat, I mean Street, has today announced the apppointment  of motor industry spokesman, Jeremy Klaxon, as Foreign Seckatry.

 

 The new foreign seckatry with his team.

 Mr Klaxon will replace Mr Philip Coma, who replaced Mr William Lube in one of the so-called  great  offices of state. 

Mr Klaxon, who will sit in the Lords,  will be known as Lord Jezza of Chipping Sodom.

 

The foreign seckatry designate with the head of his press team, Lady Becky Filth of the Old Bailey. Asked whether he would continue to work for Mr Rupert Murdoch, the foreign seckatry designate joked, why not, everyone else in govament does? 

The appointment follows Klaxon's triumphant tour of Argentina, where his diplomatic skills were so impressive that ordinary people threw stones at him in the street and ran him and his entourage out of town.

One of Mr  Gob's current employers, the Paedophile Broadcasting Corporation, commended his long service as one of the most boringly extended cliches. In the world.

A spokesman for the unelected prime minister, Mr David Cameron,  read a statement from Number Ten. Jezza is a mate, a neighbour, he went to the right sort of school and is filthy rich,  and that, let's be quite clear, is good enough for me. And doyouknowwot,   we are confident that under his stewardship British foreign policy will soon be going round corners sideways with its tyres on fire.

Jeremy Gob represents what is best about the country I am proud to lead;  hard-working, does the right thing and is a decent family man. Well, alright, perhaps not all of those things; alright, perhaps not any of them. But nevertheless, nig-nogs and foreigners and trade unions are trying to take over the world. Jezza's the man to put a stop to all that. Today, he insults Mexico and India and Birmingham. Tomorrow, the world.

 If, as I do, you long for a country distinguished by  War,  Homelessness,  Racism,  Poverty and Supidity then, with Jeremy Clarkson's help, I'm your man.  

Vote TorKip.

In next week's Rich Folks In The News:

Westminster arselicker, Michael Spit, MP,  on 

Why it would be not only homophobic but celebophobic to arrest rich people for cocaine use but entirely proper to nick ordinary people.