Crack on with it, Binary Sexual People: the world must be peopled (Benedict, Much Ado About Nothing)
Here's some raunchy music to help:
Any way, for the rest of us:
Huw Welshman Here: (give me a minute)
Long to Reign over us - How long, oh Lord, how long?
It's the Queen's Birthday.
It's the Queen's Birthday.
In a little white tent beside the lawn in Windsor Palace, an Ancient
old Tortoise in turquoise and comedy hat presides at Windsor,
whilst an even more ancient, and happily married, Prince Philip of Greece and Denmark
peers out from the upstairs window at the comedy guard carrying out callisthenics, whilst social distancing on the lawn.
whilst an even more ancient, and happily married, Prince Philip of Greece and Denmark
peers out from the upstairs window at the comedy guard carrying out callisthenics, whilst social distancing on the lawn.
What the fuck is the matter with these people? Ruritania rules.
Talking about Comedy Hats....
Socially distanced troopers and the band plays on, while feathering out to maintain social distancing. God bless you, ma'am, we'll play dress-up whilst London burns.
Prob'ly only takes one to start giggling and the whole House of Windsor House of Cards will come tumbling down - shoot the giggler, quick.
Massed bands by the centre (but not very massed) : Quick march and General Sir Rupert Golightly-Jockstrap speaks to our very own Huw Welshman:
Prob'ly only takes one to start giggling and the whole House of Windsor House of Cards will come tumbling down - shoot the giggler, quick.
Massed bands by the centre (but not very massed) : Quick march and General Sir Rupert Golightly-Jockstrap speaks to our very own Huw Welshman:
In times of crisis, we turn to our monarch. And, yeay, it's one of the Queen's Birthdays.
Did she getta cake?
How the fuck do I know?
Doesn't she prefer pinkies?
It's official, like. Not the real one.
Wot, two birthdays?
'S'okay, it's Ruritania, anything goes.
Did she getta cake?
How the fuck do I know?
Doesn't she prefer pinkies?
It's official, like. Not the real one.
Wot, two birthdays?
'S'okay, it's Ruritania, anything goes.
And, on the streets, on Saturday night,
If they say Churchill was a Racist, what the fuck do they think about t'other fella? The one with the dead slug under his nose?
Any roadup, I told you so, din't I, up the road a bit - summer of riots - I didna' think it would be over statues, for fuck sake, but any excuse will do.
6 comments:
At this point, Adolph is looking like a good option. If he's still in Argentina, he can be forgiven for saying "Ich habe es dir gesagt".
If Vladimir Vladimirovich stood for election he would get my vote. I bet Trump can't quote Pushkin, as Vlad did the other day on Pushkin's anniversary.
That two birthdays thing used to puzzle me greatly as a child - I wondered if the royal baby came out early for a wash and some bowing before being deferentially (and deftly I suppose) popped back in for some extra womb-time (because the likes of them are not like us, right?) Made a kind of sense at the time, and of course I didn't dare ask anyone about it in case they thought I was weird. Happy days.
v./
Can't remember if its a holiday over your way, Mr verge, but the working class here get a day off for the "official" birthday. Its likely why we voted to retain the monarchy. I don't really work, so I'm not bothered. Its been a bit confused this year, what with the virus, knowing what day of the week it is, and whether its a working day or not. The downside is that its been crowded on the golf course, with all the working at home - we were allowed to play, so long as we didn't shake hands, or drink a beer afterwards.
No days are working days. Not any more, Mr Mike. And the UK has performed a random sample (thank God -a talast!) Multiple testing of the same people - between 25/05 and 07/06 - 19,933 of them. Guesses may be submitted on a postcard - how many cases of covid-19 in that all-but 20,000? 11. Yes. 11 in 19,933 is, just a sec, 0.055%. Ho hum. Crisis? What crisis?
NB the above numbers are secondhand. I am looking for the source data.
Here we are:
https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/healthandsocialcare/conditionsanddiseases/bulletins/coronaviruscovid19infectionsurveypilot/12june2020
This two birthdays business is yet another manifestation of preposterous Ruritanian nonsense, started by George II, King of Great Britain and Ireland, Duke of Brunswick-Lüneburg (Hanover) and a prince-elector of the Holy Roman Empire, disliked by the British people allegedly because he couldn't, or chose not to, speak English. The Queen‘s birthday celebrations are typically rife with pomp and grandeur, music, trooping of the colour, formation marching and gun salutes. The June date was chosen because of the likely favourable weather prospects for all that out-door showing off. Eighteenth century bread and circuses. Actually, real bread - for the 1859 official birthday, bread tickets were issued by the City of Toronto granting the holder one loaf in celebration of the Queen's birthday. The official birthday is a Commonwealth thing, celebrated throughout the Commonwealth countries which still bend the knee to the monarchy.
The celebrations this year should have been abandoned. Coronavirus would have provided ample excuse, but no, the 94 year old was required to sit, in solitary state, in her little white pavilion at the edge of her lawn, smile benignly, and, on the conclusion of the cobbled-together ceremony, walk sedately back inside. She made rather a pathetic figure. And Huw Welshman just hasn't got the right tone of deferential gravitas that the Dimbleby Dynasty did so well. Maybe they could give Monty Don the gig?
My word, mr verge, you were quite the precocious child, knowing about ladies' front bottoms. I kept checking under the gooseberry bushes, hoping for a baby brother or sister, and being keen to bring the poor little thing into the house the minute the stork left it, so it wouldn't get cold.
It is Sunday today, here in Scotland, mr mike. Hope that helps.
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