Friday 19 June 2020

Caption Contest


24 comments:

Anonymous said...

Garcon de Bullingdon: "Et, uh, Madame President Jolie-Gilf, elle was told you, um, plannayed to, uh, donner moi le cock enorme, Manu?"

Pestilent Mammon: "Certainly did, Doris, and she wants it back when you've finished, too."

v./

Mike said...

Macron: it belonged to Madame Mitterand; she used to say that all she wanted was "appiness"

Anonymous said...

Like a fine Australian wine, Mr Mike, that one still has legs. (The gag, I mean.)

cheers

v./

Mike said...

I'm sure you appreciate, Mr Verge, that this was a joke about Mitterrand who lived with his mistress, not his wife.

Anonymous said...

Fine political detail tends to fly over my head, Mr Mike - I was tipping my hat to the grand old happiness pun, one of those filthy b/w jobs that would have the adults cackling and les enfants none the wiser. Chapeau.

v./

Anonymous said...

"Entente cordiale sous le coq sportif et tres grande"

Bungalow Bill said...

Nothing better than a mounted cock, Manny, n’est-ce pas?

Alas, Mr Verge has already won.

Anonymous said...

Mr Mike - just came to this, from January 2016, in my blog-snorkeling pilgrimage; both you and Mr TDG encouraged Mr Ishmael to consider a book, and on this occasion he did not demur. Interesting, and encouraging. (Hell of a post, as well, incidentally.)

http://mrishmael.blogspot.com/2016/01/the-book-of-common-pulp_1.html

cheers

v./

Bungalow Bill said...

Staggering, Mr Verge. Don't know how I missed that one. Reading Andy McNab, probably.

Anonymous said...

I love the bit about the Shetland islanders and their precious jigsaw. But what a poignant, and, in hindsight, encouraging last line. Good stuff.

v./

Bungalow Bill said...

He often cited Be Glad for the Song Has No Ending. That's as good as it gets down here and it is a proper consolation.

Anonymous said...

Thank you, Mr Verge, for that trip down memory lane. As Mr BB said, a staggering read. I always admired Mr I's skill for writing with different voices. He was very perceptive.

mrs ishmael said...

Gentlemen, as Caption-Contestants you are woefully inadequate and easily distracted.

Although, I must say, mr verge has provided us with astonishing distraction material. I find myself saying, like mr BB - how could I possibly have forgotten that essay? It should be required reading for all Writers' courses, conferences and AwayDays. Good, wasn't he?

Okay, to draw you back to task; so far we have:
1. mr verge, with his usual disgusting nonsense and le Garcon Bullingdon - which, I have to say, made me giggle
2. mr mike, with the rather pitiful plea of Mme Mitterand (how very French of m'sieur to live with his maitresse, and how very French of the journalistes and people not to care).
3. mr. anonymous with his tres grand sporting coq.
4. mr bungalow bill with his superlative mounted cock.

Only four entrants thus far, and mr. bill could be interpreted as having already conceded to mr. verge, the house filthster.
But mr verge played a flanker with his distraction superlatif. (Should that disqualify him, Ishmaelia?) I'm inclined to let it ride, but not to allow mr bill to concede.

Do not let all of the above excellent captioning and distractions deter you, mes amies, from submitting your own entries to our Caption Contest.

The competition remains open until the next Sunday Ishmael is posted, when I will announce the winner, without fear or favour.
Could we possibly have some entries from the girls?(or people who menstruate, as we now have to call them?)

Mike said...

PS Anonymous just above is Mike, for the record.

mrs ishmael said...

Is that mr anonymous with his tres grande coq sportif or mr anonymous with his trip down memory lane? If the former, that's two entries down to you, and that's fine, nothing in the rules against multiple entries (as the actress ....sorry, decent family blog)

Mike said...

Its memory lane only, Mrs I.

Macron: Ah Boris, mon ami, because I'm gay you thought I was exaggerating.

Macron: I have the female of the species at home.

Anonymous said...

Those Incredible String Band references, Mr BB, tend to pass me by, as do most of the Dylan (or as we must now concede, Ovid & Virgil) lines inserted as a kind of hidden-in-plain-view semaphore for Mr Mongoose, but I'm a little less remiss when it comes to spotting Gray's Elegy, Hamlet and the KJB. Only a bit, though. Anyway, not yet six months into the anthology project, and progress is good. Working title is "Honest, Not Invent : The Best of Stanislav & Other Voices". I hope that sounds ok to all who gather here.

v./

Anonymous said...

That would be la poulette au barbe, Mr Mike?

v./

mrs ishmael said...

It has my imprimatur, mr editor mr verge. And thanks. That's a lot of midnight oil has been burned, I'm sure.

Mike said...

Excellent title Mr Verge. Congratulations.

Anonymous said...

Thanks, Mr Mike.

Of course it wouldn't be possible without the gracious permission and generous encouragement of Mrs Ishmael.

Regrettably, there will be no photographs - copyright, and my own technical limitations - and the text is almost entirely Stanislav and Ishmael; so, lacking the visual component, and the back-and-forth of commentariat regulars, it'll never be a perfect summary of what was achieved over the years, but all the same I'm confident the book will see him right.

v./

mongoose said...

Bravo, mr v. Well done, Sir.

Bungalow Bill said...

Fabulous work, Mr Verge. Thanks also to Mrs I.

Anonymous said...

Thanks, all. Very glad to hear the title sounds like the right choice. Onward...

v./