THEY CAME FROM OUTER SPACE.

I AM GOVE, SMELL MY BREATH

Yes, the hospitals, let me finish, burn them down, no, blow them up, that's it, blow them up, no, let me finish, I am very clever, shut up and listen to me. Blow them up, y'see, it's actually the best thing to do with them. If you have hospitals people'll go in 'em, see , when they're ill, and that costs money, and that's money we could be spending on other things, private schools for instance,  for  y children, who are like many of my supporters's children, gifted, in the very rela sense that they have me as theuir father, and another thing,  people expect not just to go in the hospitals but to get treated in 'em, y'see, and get better, and probably come home and want sickness benefit, which we must scrap. Because we 're all in this together. We can save the money the hospitals cost and give it to wealth creating  demolition companies, instead, or as well as, doesn't matter, just as long as we wreck things for ordinary people. Who don't know any better. And the best thing of all is we can blame it on thepartyopposite, who are every bit as bad as us but worse.  Health service, no, absolutely ring fenced, best Tory invention ever.

Now I don't suggest for a moment that we are gonna target the poor and defenceless but that's exactly what we're gonna do, after we talk to them about it, or, not really talk to them, just talk about talking to them about it - as if - and getting them to agree that  them losing their benefit is the best thing since sliced bread, not that they'll be getting much of that down at the very necessary soup kitchens which we are tasking the private sector with establishing.

It's tough times ahead all around and I for one am going to enjoy them hugely, that's what I came to Earth, sorry, into politics for.

What's that? My ears? No, of course I don't breathe through them. Well, not on this planet.

For more news on the terrible,savage and hurtful cuts:

Read the Times. Or the Sun. 

All human lies are there.