Thursday 30 April 2009

THE WHINING HOBBIT

 

PHIL HOBBIT ENJOYS SOME NEPALESE FAST FOOD

Mr Hobbit, formerly, wouldncha just know, a BBC2 Newswank producer, was previously a minister at the Department of EcoBullying.

In a Panorama programme last year, the current minister for white supremacy insisted that bottled water was shit and planetarily-hostile, wouldn't do, wasn't necessary in the Great New Presbyteria of Uncle Snot, son of the fucking manse. In my department everyone drinks pure water from the tap, he whined, grinning that Mummy's boy grin - the one which drunken old boot, Patsy, removed, yesterday, from his smirking, rotten kisser.

A little while after his virtuous Panorama spot the beavers in the back of The Eye - the ones who aren't all over the telly like swine flu - revealed that you and I had bought Phil's EcoSoldiers hugely expensive water filters and not a drop of unfiltered water passed their lips, or his. The rest of us he had airily and deceitfully maintained, needed no such precautions.

Up against the wall, hobbit motherfuckers.
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