Sunday 6 October 2024

The Sunday Ishmael: 06/10/2024

 

Oh joy, oh bliss - an excuse to run Boris and Laura on a bench again. Although Boris should be haranguing Laura, as the silly girl copied him into the list of questions she was going to ask him in an interview scheduled for Thursday, so the programme was pulled and he missed the opportunity of plugging his new book:
So it is left to Amber Rudd, former Home Secretary, to do it for him. Rudd, famous for saying that Boris was the life and soul of parties, but not safe in taxis, said his new book is more like the Beano comic than a serious book (good to know that Conservative Home Secretaries read The Beano). Writing in The Independent, she also 
said that the book is the product of his "split personality" and reads like "Billy Bunter let loose in Westminster  with its endless whooses and biffs and sockeroos."

Honestly, these Tories, what are they like? She's definitely sold me on the book, though I'll have to wait until the library gets it in, on account of times are hard, what with no Winter Fuel Allowance.

Talking of Laura Kuenssberg, who fronts the BBC's Sunday morning anti-Israeli show; she was in prime snarling mode today, interrogating the Israeli Ambassador to Britain. 
Tzipi Hotovely, the Ambassador, was clearly astonished by the savagery with which Laura interrupted her, refusing to let her set out Israel's case for defending itself against its enemies. She expected better from a Western ally on the anniversary of the atrocity of October 7th 2023. The terrorist organisation Hamas, ably supported by the "innocent" civilian population of Gaza, some on foot, some on motorbikes, invaded Israel in an unprovoked attack, torturing, mutilating, raping and murdering Israeli men, women, children and babies, before abducting 170 citizens to hold as hostages (not sausages, Sir Keir) in the tunnels underneath Gaza; that is to be forgotten, now that a year has passed, and Israeli's retaliation and attempts to free the hostages and reduce Hamas' weaponry, soldiery and command structure to render Hamas incapable of further atrocities is now to be regarded as genocidal war crimes. Really? Really? 
And the terrorist organisation Hezbollah joining in, supporting Hamas, firing rockets into Israel from Lebanon daily, from the 8th October 2023, that's a year ago, is to be seen as a  legitimate resistance movement - you know, like the French Resistance against Nazi Occupation of France; and Israel's defence against the barrage (and the fun with the pagers and walkie talkies, the assassination of Hezbollah leaders and the blowing up of weapons dumps cached in schools and hospitals) is to be seen as disproportionate. Really? Really?

Laura's panel comprised Zanny Minton Beddoes, the editor of the Economist, who has been to Gaza and was upset by the disproportionately ruined buildings, Zarah Sultana, an MP currently suspended from the Labour Party for her disproportionately appalling pro-Palestinian views, and Malcolm Rifkind, a former foreign secretary. There was also a brief guest appearance by Masoumeh Ebtekar, former Vice President in the Iranian Cabinet. 

Jolly-looking Masoumeh turned out to be so controversial she was cut off just before she began slavering at the mouth. She'd just got done telling us that the Middle East was a place of Peace and Plenty until 1948 when billions of thousands of Palestinians were displaced to make room for .... when the BBC lost the line.

Says something about that line-up that Shouty Rifkind sounded like the voice of measured civilisation amidst the rabble. Remember Shouty, he of the Deep Brown Voice? He used to be a Conservative politician. Scottish chap. Foreign Secretary under John Major. Fancied himself as a bit of a Middle East expert. He committed the British Government, for the first time, to a Palestinian State on the West Bank and in Gaza and called for a Middle Eastern equivalent of the Organization for Security and Co-operation in Europe (OSCE) to enable dialogue to take place, at the regional level between Israel and its Arab neighbours as well as between Iran and the Arab world. That didn't turn out too well. He was turfed out of his Scottish seat - like the other Scottish Tories by the SNP, but secured the continuation of his Parliamentary career in the 2005 election when he was returned as the MP for Kensington and Chelsea, down London. He even fancied himself as leader of the Conservative Party, but then, don't they all?
He ended his career as Chair of the Intelligence and Security Committee in 2015, following a cash for access stunt set up by Channel 4 Dispatches and Daily Telegraph journalists. He made some rather elitist tone-deaf comments, arousing the ire of not just the nation, but his own Tory colleagues, who fumed over his remarks that as an MP he had plenty of free time and that he was “entitled” to earn more than £67,000. Then there were the run of the mill expenses scandals. mr ishmael had a few remarks about that:
Malcolm Shouty, too, he and his wife's misuse of MPs' expenses should have seen him thrown-out on his arse and kicked up and down the Mall 

Taxi? To the corner shop?
Yes, dear, the voters'll pay,
'swhat they're for

but no, to compensate him for his embarrassment,  they put a crook, a  noisy, bullying blackguard, in charge of overseeing national security matters, so that he might sell them on to the highest bidders. 
"Conservative Malcolm Rifkind got 3,066 pounds ($4,800) last year for flights to his home in Scotland -- though he represents a district three subway stops from the Parliament in London.
“It’s amazing some of the things they’ve given themselves over the years,” said Andrew Rawnsley, author of “Servants of the People,” a history of Tony Blair’s government. “Why on earth would you need to visit Scotland in order to represent people in London? It’s all within the rules, but it all repels voters.”

"Sir Malcolm Rifkind, the former Tory Cabinet minister, raised eyebrows by claiming £499 for three trips by his wife. His constituency is Kensington and Chelsea, three miles from London”
from The Motley Fool blog 

Old ShoutyGob Rifkind, briefly foreign seckatry,  enjoys, too, in these troubled times, a rebirthing, shouting about Iran, Syria, China and of course Europe.  A CallHimDave loyalist, maybe hoping for office, hoping for an Indian Summer of bullying and fiddling and all the vices his skill set lends him to, the horrible fucking bent Anglo-Jock bastard  hedges his bets on Europe, Well,  I'm not persuaded of this and I'm not persuaded of that, he shouts to a dwindling Newsnight audience and to the bombastic Jocky Neil on his  many platforms.

But he must be rehabilitated now, as he was wheeled in as the Middle East expert on the Sunday Laura show today. And he does seem to have dialled down the Shoutiness - and actually seemed to have a grasp on the Iran problem.
Anyway, we'll find out over the next week or so if we're in for a nuclear war.

Orkney News

To matters more local - well, local to me, anyway. The University of Edinburgh’s Usher Institute has reported on its study of anonymised genetic information from more than 44,000 people across 20 regions  in Britain, based on data from the UK BioBank and Viking Genes studies. The most genetically distinct populations were found in Shetland and Orkney, where some disease-causing variants were over 100 times more common than elsewhere in Britain.  A pocket of genetic susceptibility in Orkney and Shetland, in consequence of an isolated population and limited gene pool, has caused the population to be at six times the risk of Bardet-Biedl syndrome. This can cause obesity, vision loss and the growth of additional fingers and toes. That explains a lot. Remember mr ishmael's description of nurses, big, like elephants, thundering through the wards?

The charity, Wild Fish, has published a report stating that Orkney salmon farmers pose a major risk to wild fish in Scottish waters. A model of tides was used to simulate dispersion of sea lice. The press release stated: "The findings of this report underline the need for fishery boards to apply real pressure on the salmon farming industry in the Northern Isles, Orkney in particular, to maintain on-farm sea lice within strict minimal limits. The Scottish Environment Protection Agency(should) expand its sea lice regulatory framework to farms in the Northern Isles which are currently exempt from the regulation in order to protect both salmon and sea trout.
I've warned you before about 
lice-ridden farmed salmon and the over-crowded conditions. Don't believe any of the marketing hype about cold crystal clear waters, strong tides and lean, healthy salmon. Shortly after we came to Orkney, there was a warning on Radio Orkney, following a storm that had breached the sea pens and released salmon. Not fit for human consumption, the warning said. Just leave them where they've washed up on the shore. 
So what was the response of the Orkney salmon farming industry? A spokesman said: "we strongly question the credibility of any reports commissioned and paid for by the charity Wild Fish."

To end on a happier note -here's some photos of autumnal Orkney:






Anagram Corner, answer - Kemi Badenoch 

There are four splendid anthologies of the writings of stanislav and mr ishmael, compiled by his friend, mr verge, the house filthster. You can buy them from Amazon or Lulu. Here's how:
Honest Not Invent, Vent Stack, Ishmael’s Blues, and the latest, Flush Test (with a nice picture of the late, much lamented, Mr Harris of Lanarkshire taking a piss on a totem pole) are available from Lulu and Amazon. If you buy from Amazon, it would be nice if you could give a review on their website.
IIshmaelites wishing to buy a copy from lulu should follow these steps 
please register an account first, at lulu.com. This is advisable because otherwise paypal seems to think it's ok to charge in dollars, and they then apply their own conversion rate, which might put the price up slightly for a UK buyer. Once the new account is set up, follow one of the links below (to either paperback or hardback) or type "Ishmael’s Blues" into the Lulu Bookstore search box. Click on the “show explicit content” tab, give the age verification box a date of birth such as 1 January 1960, and proceed.
Link for Hardcover : https://tinyurl.com/je7nddfr
Link for Paperback : https://tinyurl.com/3jurrzux
https://www.lulu.com/shop/ishmael-smith/flush-test/paperback/product-9yjvn7.html?q=Flush+Test&page=1&pageSize=4

At checkout, try WELCOME15 in the coupon box, which (for the moment) takes 15% off the price before postage. If this code has expired by the time you reach this point, try a google search for "Lulu.com voucher code" and see what comes up.
With the 15% voucher, PB (including delivery to a UK address) should be £16.84; HB £27.04.
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26 comments:

Veritas said...

Good Evening Mrs Ishmael, My Father was stationed in Palestine 44/45 , He said the climate was wonderful and the people friendly he wanted to stay there but was married to my mother in England ,Anyway an interesting book for you to read written by Haifa born Ilan Pappe The Ethnic cleansing of Palestine well reviewed By John Pilger and others ,Ive some questions about the winter fuel allowance and millionaire pensioners, I have a modest private pension and pay income tax on it, I wonder how much income tax millionaire pensioners pay, Perhaps theyre subsidising your salary/pension, Any way may your lum reek or whatever the expression is, au revoir madame

Anonymous said...

Mr veritas: my dad (PBUH) was all over North Africa, Palestine, The Lebanon during WW2, as well. He too had good memories.He always felt it was the mis-fortune of that region to fall under the colonial rule of Britain and France. In particular, the illegal gifting of Palestinian land to create a state of Israel, which resulted in the forced displacement of hundreds of thousands of Palestianians and the murder of tens of thousands of them - genocide which continues to this day. All illegal under UN resolutions.

This will only be resolved by war, which is underway as we speak.

BTW, the original semites are Palestinian arabs; the current Israeli settlers are largely European - post WW2 and post the fall of the Soviet Union.

A quarter of Israelis are Russian citizens. How does the US and is vassals (notably the UK) square its hatred for all things Russian with its love for Israelis?

Mike said...

Apologies, Mr veritas for not signing.

inmate said...

Exactly, Mr Mike, peoples living around the ‘Fertile Crescent’ for thousands of years, ancient Egyptians, Hebrews, Philistines, Arabians, not Persians, not modern Arabs. As I mentioned back down the road, not until the import of the new Jews from Eastern Europe, the Ashkenazi, has the troubles started.
A single state, as envisioned originally, is the only solution. No special treatment for the ‘chosen ones’ equal votes, equal opportunity for all Israelis.

Anonymous said...

Mr inmate: historically, and presently, Jews, Arabs and Musllems have coexisted harmoniously - take Iran and Russia as current examples.

Larry Johnson states "With regard to who has legitimate rights to live in the land now claimed by Israel, when was the last time prior to 1948 that a Jewish leader ruled over the lands now called Israel and Palestine? It has been more than 2,000 years." He then presents the timeline:

https://sonar21.com/a-zionist-perspective-on-why-israel-is-entitled-to-palestine/

The problem is not Judaism, its the ideology of zionism.

Mike said...

Me again, apologies.

inmate said...

An excellent article Mr Mike, thank you. Yes since the Romans fulfilled prophecy, creating the diaspora, the local hebes have been spread around the world. No doubt many remained in what we now call Israel, to scratch a living with many non-hebrews. Not until 1948 did the eastern european zionists take advantage of Israel. Zionism, communism in all but name. I feel that the troubles in Ukraine are the zionists next target for a new Israel .

Bungalow Bill said...

Lovely scenes, Mrs I.

mrs ishmael said...

Sorry I've been absent from the discourse - I've been in the hospital, being looked after by nurses, big like elephants and by a Muslim consultant, who was kind and expert.
mr veritas, my father also had a big war - North Africa, Italy, France, Belgium, Germany. He brought back to Britain a European wife. His North African campaign was rendered memorable for him by his louse-extermination duties - he was part of the R.A.M.C. I don't know why he and his men were tasked with de-lousing Arabs, but so they were - stripping and bathing male Arabs and burning all their robes, whilst their wives waited outside with other clothes. No doubt the Arabs subjected to the treatment considered it a massive violation. My dad found the Arabs to be very other - he was a Yorkshire man and found the ululation to be embarrassing, the shrouded women to be an affront, the sharp practice down the souk frightening and the beggars pitiful. In his telling, North Africa was a basket case, populated by resentful citizens.
I'm no' Scoatisch, mr veritas, by the way- I was marooned in Orkney at the beginning of this century, a stranger in a strange land, an incomer from the hated England, furthermore I have solar panels and a heat pump and no chimney, so my lum will not be reeking. But thanks for the thought.

mrs ishmael said...

Thank you, mr bungalow bill, I thought you'd like a screen shot of northern autumn.

mrs ishmael said...

So, mr mike, what do you make of the Russian threat of disruption to everyday life that our security services have warned us about?
I was heartened to hear that the Royal Navy will be sending some time in Orkney waters later this month, but it is concerning that it is needful.

Anonymous said...

Russia doesn't need to do anything Mrs I, just sit back and watch what's happening in the UK.

veritas said...

My Father Mrs Ishmael had a more interesting job than yours, He was a pox doctors clerk, or should i say a medical orderly in a forces std clinic in Palestine, Lang may yer lum reek i thought meant may you live forever

mrs ishmael said...

It's an uncouth language, mr veritas, indeed it is. A lum is a chimney, and reek is smoke, so the literal translation is "long may your chimney smoke" which, I assume means long life and prosperity, rather than "may your sitting room be filled with smoke".
My dad was a medical orderly, too, but he had general duties - which included guarding corpses, de-lousing, fetching and carrying: he told me that because the jeep and ambulance convoys never stopped once underway, medical orderlies were kept busy carrying buckets for use by the nurses as makeshift toilets on the vehicles.

mrs ishmael said...

I always said it was a bad policy to alienate Russia by supporting Ukraine, mr mike.

Mike said...

Its been catastrophic, Mrs I. When Ukraine (ie NATO) capitulates to Russia in the near future the fallout will be off the Richter scale for the US and its vassals, notably the UK.

So far we have witnessed the substantial economic impact particularly on Europe, and Germany in particular as it is de-industrialising absent cheap, clean, reliable Russian energy which was the basis for growth since WW2. Ironically, Russia is still the major gas supplier to Europe - except at a much higher price. Ditto oil, which comes "anonymously" via India.

Meanwhile, as western Europe shrinks, Russia is the fastest growing economy in "Europe"

During the last 2 years the US (and vassals) have isolated themselves from the worlds majority. The cherry will be put on the cake at the BRICS meeting in Kazan in 10 days time.

The US is currently washing it hands of Ukraine; the US' main partner in this project, the UK, will in particular be on the receiving end when accounts are settled.

mrs ishmael said...

Hell's teeth, mr mike - cheerful this morning, much?

Mike said...

I didn't even mention the 1M Ukrainians dead because BoJo scuppered the Istanbul agreement. And a country destroyed because the West went on their centennial attempt to conquer Russia.

BTW I'm still confused as to the origins of Russiaphobia??

inmate said...

“BTW I’m still confused as to the origins of Russiaphobia”
Well they don’t do as they’re told by the USnA and they threw out the Rothschild central bankers.
Plus Putin asked to be considered to join NATO, numerous times, but that would mean the Americans protecting all that mineral wealth, rather than taking it as they have always wanted to.

inmate said...

Oh, I see fat Alec has shed his mortal coil. ODHSNM.

ultrapox said...

absolutely, mr inmate...

what earth-shattering news about the farther of scottish nationalism: i understand that, at the time of his demise, the former first minister was speaking from a stage which subsequently collapsed.

ultrapox said...
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ultrapox said...

such a tireless campaigner, who never lost his appetite for independence...

and indeed i suppose it's a measure of the man that, true to form, he died with his boots on, so-to-speak.

yes, a pillar of the edinburgh-establishment and a giant of public life, whose passing will not only leave a huge hole in scottish politics, but will also constitute a heavy blow to his supporters...

who will now no doubt be obliged to weigh their options.

ultrapox said...
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ultrapox said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
ultrapox said...

sadly, there appears to have been some confusion as to the precise circumstances in which the former first minister passed...

you see, according to an old glaswegian friend, the alba-leader's plane mysteriously failed to gain altitude during take-off, and then tragically crashed into a local branch of macdungballs - which was fortunately closed at the time...

but on the other hand, this friend's son has heard that the grand-inseminator of scottish independence was tempted by undercover mossad-agents to eat a 'full-sheep' kebab - however, i find this possibility somewhat unlikely, since the obvious suspects in such a dastardly assassination-attempt would surely be specially-trained female members of the scottish intelligence service haggis.

now there again, another acquiantance - hailing from a rather rougher part of glasgow - is under the distinct impression that, whilst loading was in process for the great digestor's flight from macedonia, the giant of scottish politics met his untimely end in a freak baggage-handling accident.