Wednesday 15 February 2023

Looks like we've slain the Jabberwok, boys!

 


Beware the Jabberwock, my son
   The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!

She's been thinking it over and decided it's time to go. Hurray, we cry, we agree! 
It was the reverse vending machines and 20 pence on the price of oor wee tinnies that did it. Messing with our god given right to drink oorsel's to death! First the miminmum unit pricing for alcohol, and noo the twenty pee. There are limits! We could stomach the multiple rapists bein locked up with the wimmin - well, they're a bad lot; and we don't care if some tranny wants to call hisself a woman and get a sustificate to get into women's refuges and put some cock about, cos they're a bad lot too - wouldna have to hit 'em if they didna deserve it, but messin' with oor Buckies is the last straw.

And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
   Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!
   He chortled in his joy.

We just have to watch out for the frumious Bandersnatch now.
Salmon and Swinnie - two frumious Bandersnatches


14 comments:

Mike said...

Wll done Mrs I. It was your previous post wot did it.

mrs ishmael said...

Thank you, mr mike: it was a long, hard and bitter campaign - as the First Minister for the time being said herself, politics is a brutal thing. But we fought with passion and determination and prevailed. We cannot rest, though, as long as there are frumious bandersnatches waiting their chance to tear apart the United Kingdom and drink its blood.
Actually, I'm told that Gnasher's long dark night of the soul and discovery that, after all, she didn't have much left in the tank, was less to do with adverse comment from the blogosphere and more to do with the need to whip hubby out of the limelight as something ghastly is about to emerge about the CEO of the SNP. We'll see.

Mike said...

We fought them on the beaches.....it was the end of the beginning.....or the beginning of the end?

I'm sure you are correct Mrs I. Mrs Fish would not be hanging up her wee stilettos unless there was some major scandal about to unfold, or which needed concealing.

ultrapox said...

good things come to those who wait, watch, and gnaw relentlessly away at the corrupt neo-liberal fabric of fort holyrood: congratulations upon losing your lousy lady-leader, mrs ishmael...

however, with all due respect to mr mike's analysis, it is - rather than mrs ishmael's brilliant debunking of highland-hypocrisy and iffy ideological nationalism - more probably the ineluctable, incremental exposure of scotland's lockdown-'n-vax genocide - or perhaps a personal adverse reaction to the coronavirus-vaccination itself - which has ultimately done for mrs stirdung.

to my mind, it constitutes no concidence that covid-gauleiters ardern, drinkwater, and now sturgeon have, at the ostensible peak of their political powers, all quit the plot due to 'empty tanks' - and that this co-ordinated collapse in the house-of-careers has happened against a nationwide back-drop of unforced early retirement...

for the inconvenient truth of the matter is that, in the wake of killer-lockdowns, mrnaboosters and vaccinations irreparably undermine health, careers, and economies - to such an extent, in fact, that even the queen appears to have been prematurely terminated.

yeah, you know...

i always used to become incredibly infuriated whenever - to sell his latest brand of nepotistic neo-imperialist bullshit - notorious neo-con nazi and former british prime minister, mr testosterone-tone, made one of his universally-unwelcome appearances on the box...

yet should the unmenschlichkeit of such an unconscionable pop-up assail me today, i simply relax, recline...

and then retort:

keep taking the jabs, tony

winston's budgie said...

what a gay day

mongoose said...

A Wee Free! Married to a chimney sweep? An anti-abortion fundamentalist?

We need popcorn!

inmate said...

I make you right mr ultrapox, however word on the interwebs is that the missing 100 k, or is it 500 k pounds Stirling, was payoff to the French rugmuncher for the fishwifes’ daliance in an Edinburgh hotel, oh, and the damage to the hotel room, and maybe a tad of money laundering for her haha husband haha, a well practiced perversion of the political class, just ask mr teflon tone n ‘is slotgob mrs.

Dick the Prick said...

Dear Mrs Smith. I have no idea who Mr Smithwas but a million thoughts. I think I ha=have got my job in some part to your love. I'm trying to work out if i'm angry - no, I don't think so xx DtP Angry culturaly...bored myself

Dick the Prick said...

I may have got a job because Mr Smith took on Iain Dale and that Guido tit and I did my audit job and Mr Smith was funnier. Lets lawyer up!

Dick the Prick said...

Soz, of corse not lawyer up, shit joke. He taught me lessons. I put it to you that Canada and Australia went mental. You can still feel the urge. Wentinto work today for the third time in 3 years. Chap who's been givingme shit is a dwarf. Huge head, tiny body & a gobby cunt. I think I shall use all of my skills this weekend. (a guy has been blaming me for a stray cat that I told to sort it's life out...

yardarm said...

Gnasher and husband may well be hauled off from the court, legs a tremble and sobbing with fear and regret to Barlinnie.

mrs ishmael said...

Well, there's the missing £600,000, and then there's the (totally unfounded but quite delicious) internet rumour in which Nicola Sturgeon caught her secret lesbian lover – a high ranking French diplomat – in bed with another woman in the Balmoral hotel. So enraged was the First Minister that she threw an iron at her wayward lover. Such a womanly weapon - an iron. But what was it doing out in the hotel bedroom? Did the lovers have a quick ironing session before being overcome by lust, and didn't have time to put the ironing board away? Or was it intrinsic to their cosplay - the scenario in which the French diplomat seduces the maid? Unless the iron was a dwarf Cockney gay spectator, and oor Nickie was able to hurl him at the participants caught in fragrant delight?

yardarm said...

Gnasher`s sense of entitlement to becoming President of the People`s Republic of Scotland is so strong only terror of deep personal shit heading her way would have made her relinquish her meal ticket (one of them, anyway).

That £600K...and her husband lending over 100 grand to the SNP of which he is CEO....she says she knew nothing about it. Remember whatzername, Tessa Mills, in Blair`s Cabinet, said she didn`t know her husband was working for Silvio Berlusconi when he was charged by an Italian court ? Like there was no chat when he got home from work: " Got a new client love, you`ll never believe who....only Silvio fucking Berlusconi. the fucking Prime Minister of fucking Italy ".

Fuck right off with that bullshit.

yardarm said...

Tessa Jowell; her accountant husband, Berlusconi`s mate was Mills.