MAD YOUNG PARENT AND DRUGGED-UP NUTTER
JOINS THE INDEPENDENCE DEBATE.
He's learned how to march but to his own tune,
he is acting outwith the Better Together Campaign,
No, piss off, Darling, or ye'll get a Nokiaphone in the heid.
I am perfectly capable of fucking this up myself.
just as he always has, Gordon knows best; if he saved the financial world - by privatisng its profits and nationalising its losses - why, he can easily save the Union. He thinks he's aping the oratorical style of Mr Nick I-agree-with-Nick Clegg, who wanders around the stage asking himself questions such as
Does this mean I am a liar,
No, of course it doesn't, even though patently I am, and so on...
CallHimDave, the unelected prime minister, spiv, cheat and nincompoop has also taken to bestriding the stage, only not like a Colossus, more like a gibbon in a suit; it is, in short, the new style of bullshit al le Bretagne, they all do it and we can bet that if he could be hooked-up to a portable autocue, Uncle Sam's Commander in Chief would similarly address his fellow motherfuckers. Gordon though, as you would expect, can't carry it off, the casual, just-having-a-chat-with-you-approach,
One nation, Scotland and England, under me.
no, he marches, as though he has metronome psychosis, back and
forth, back and forth, back and forth, like one of those Greek
ceremonial guards, flinging each leg in the air and swivelling,
just-so, after just-so-many paces and returning across the stage. march, march, march. You'd have a wee bIt more respect for him if he just stood at a lectern, and clawed it to bits.
Set yer moral compasS, Scotland.
It's my way or the highway.
Look, there's no snot on this tie, not yet.
NEGLECT IN THE COMMUNITY.
I have tae go, the noo, it's time fer ma medi-cay-shuns.
(sings) So ye'll tak' the highroad and Ah'll tak the lowroad
An' Ah'll be in the loonybin afore ye.
He has been schooled, obviously, in his new, Trust-me-I-can-walk style of haranguing people. But it's the same old shit, he no longer has a despatch box so, with his nailbitten Claws of Doom, he slaps the air itself, chopping downwards as though striking Tony Blair's Adam's Apple, he still does that thing with his jaw, his infamous, feverish drywank jawdrop and he still over-articulates his words in the ghastly, showy way he always has - dee-vohl-you-shun; he still admonishes and harangues, he is still as mad as a fucking hatter, didactic I-Know-Bestism, ranting, growling, bullying and bad to boot.
First the leaden, hamfisted dunderhead. Fat Al Carmichael
Och, will you just get me,
mincing intae Downing Street as Scottish Seckatry.
and now Gordon Snot; greedybastard and lying fuckpig, Alec Salmond, is surely having it his own way......
Aye.
Gordon, an' wisnae he the most hated politician in living memeory?
9 comments:
Selfishly, my main concern is whether it is going to be safe for English-sounding immigrants to settle in Scotland after the vote, whatever the outcome.
I know we don't agree on this, but poor, poor Caliban. It must be awful, trapped inside himself with no escape, ever. I want to believe there is some hope.
He bankrupted my compassion treasury long ago, mrs n, as did all of them, with Iraq.
Well I thought you dealt with McRuin very even-handedly there, Mr. I, very nicely judged and not in the least partisan.
mrs n: imagine what he would write if he decided to have a real go at the specious pile of ordure.
And the audience was worse if anything - people were actually bloody clapping him and taking the twisted bastard seriously. Ye gods and little fishes there's no hope at all ...
It was amazing, the applause. I watched an STV show last night wherein some gobby Labour spinner, Simon Pia, opined that history would judge Gordon very differently, yes, it will but not in the way that Pia thinks.
There is a danger in that by being revolted by Brown we lose sight of Blair, who was much worse, if maybe less personally tragic; the entire NewLabour project was Ruin's triumph, a moronic public voting for a cheesy smile.
There is are places for all the above four in today's world.
Sadly they have not yet been dug.
"outwith"?
You have been infested by jock.
Oh, and what happened to the science is settled, etc, post that disappeared??
Get ready for a Gordon comeback in some form, and even Blair, when Labour win the next GE. They know where all the skeletons are.
I think that the "outwith" was ironic, mr rwg but I wouldn't swear to it. The science post was wrongly posted.
Christ, I hope not, mr mike, else I'll be joining you down there in the hothouse economy of Western Australia.
enough of a graveyard, that, mr alphons, to resurrect, so to speak, the Co-Op funeral business.
I did some work for him and Fitba' McLeish in the early nineties and he did the drywank jawdrop even then. Always paid me on time, mind.
Viewed from down here and disenfranchised as I am, it's all very entertaining. Six months still to go...
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