Sunday 6 March 2011

SAS CAPTURED. ANOTHER COALITION TRIUMPH.

SERGEANT ROSS GOES TO WAR.
AND  GETS ARRESTED.
 It's a man's life, in the regiment, knoworramean, me an the lads just adopt a proper,
manly approach, like, to being arrested by a buncha nig-nogs in rusty Toyotas.

WORTHLESS PONCE TALKS TOUGH

Well, let me just say that some leaders send the SAS into trouble spots,  they get in quick,  they kill whoever it is, and then they get out again, quick.  That, though, is the old politics and as commander-in- chief of the most rapidly shrinking armed forces in the world I am just as committed to fucking things up abroad as I am at home.  The army, after all, is a branch of the public sector, which is, in a very real sense, the enemy within. Or, in this case, without;  not entirely sure where Libya is, but I know it's a long way away.  I mean, just imagine, the elite British  SAS, being captured by the  very people we are trying to help and  then being held in detention by a bunch of amateur, raghead Allah-be-praised monkeys, loosing-off with antique anti-aircraft weapons, like children. Only the Coalition can deliver joined-up, cost-effective foreign policy triumphs like this and I am very seriously considering the award of a Victoria Cross for the foreign seckatry, Mr William Miscarriage, I mean Hague. And  for Doctor Fox, in whom I have the greatest confidence,  the cunt.

18 comments:

PT Barnum said...

I saw Doctor Fox on Marr this morning. Leaving aside the fact he obviously believes he is Welsh Sektry, as he was filmed standing on the pitch of a stadium with daffodil emblems, I was mesmerised by the utter immobility of his entire face and body, with only the smallest movements of his mouth (to let the bullshit out) to indicate he was actually alive.

Unless he was a CGI effect done on the cheap. And, given the grotesque and unnatural acts being performed by the coalition, I'm wondering if all of them might be CGI projections manufactured by a hacker from WarMongerers Inc. (USA).

call me ishmael said...

Unsettled me, greatly, he did, the minute or so I could bear of him. Don't usually watch Andy Blowjob doing his Eamonn Andrews impersonation but drifted inadvertently into a couple of brief samples, Fox and the imbecile Eurythmics woman, is she a woman, Lennox, any road up, thirty seconds of her stuttering was more than enough.

Judging from Foxy's visage and his tremolo I-Know-Nothings one might conclude that something quite serious is amiss, not that these stupid fuckers'd know if it was.

yardarm said...

Just seen Kemp alike (fake macho slaphead with sexuality issues) William ' Palmerston ' Hague rhubarbing the ' cannot comment futher ' spiel, like Fox, as if anyone in the UK never mind Libya believes a word these two halfwits say.

Cumberland has postponed her ETA with the breakers yard and is heading back to Benghazi: no doubt to give the SAS blokes their redundancy notices.

call me ishmael said...

Who dares gets sacked, eh?

a young Anglo-Irish catholic said...

Coming up next...another of Britain's crack armed forces is relieved of his iPod by jonny foreigner.

Fuck me, well that's what comes of the last 13 years of hiring people from non-traditional backgrounds for important jobs.

mongoose said...

As Master Yoda used to say more to it there is than the eye meets. And I wouldn't believe a single word printed in the Sunday Times if I were y'all. Not one.

One imagines that in the world of routine betrayal and cant which is Middle East diplomacy, we are "covering our options". Making shite deals with every passing bastard son. And the FCO would like nothing more than to shit on the military. Jeez, it is more or less their raison wotsit.

call me ishmael said...

".....wouldn't believe a single word printed in the Sunday Times." As if, mr m, as the young people so engagingly say. Not.

yardarm said...

Urgent conference calls, back door access to No 10 for suits and spooks, corporate reminders of favours done and yet to come, eyes over the shoulder to the French, the Yanks, China, middlemen rubbing hands, Putin angry as Operation Foot on European Windpipe jeopardised, who gains traction with nascent post Gaddafi regime, especially after Blairs bum sucking of Mad Muammer, get those assets on the ground quick, SAS ? HMS Next Week`s Razorblades vs the U.S. Sixth Fleet ?

Dirty work at the crossroads: round and round it goes, where it stops, who the fuck knows ?

Mike said...

Hard to take anything on face value nowadays. Half the FO/MI6 and Tony Blair will be briefing Gadaffi; the other half will be briefing the rebels; and the third half will be wondering which side to go with to further their careers.

Meanwhile the only remaining bit of the UK with any pretention to world class - the special forces - are dropped in the poo.

If I was a cynic I would say its deliberate, but then again cock-up is the most likely explanation.

Mike said...

PS - the urgency with which the SAS are sent, and 600 jocks are put on 24 hour standby, reflects the amount of incriminating shit in Libya that need shredding (or putting under a 100-year ban), for our own good.

Dick the Prick said...

'dropped off next to an agricultural unit in a helicopter in the dead of night and met by 2 British officials'....hokey dokey. It's always a pleasure when Universal Exports use the old 'agricultural equipment' rouse, never a chore. Sounds like they didn't take enough cash. One of the err sanctions (good a word as any) placed by the UK was that we'd stop printing their bank notes; truly somewhere betwixt the sublime and ridiculous.

PT Barnum said...

I see Pinochet the Sequel hoving over the horizon. Well, says Dave, he has to go into exile somewhere, and we can keep a proper eye on him here, can't we?

call me ishmael said...

The UK Govament has, over the past few Middle Eastern weeks, displayed a staggeringly cack-handed ineptitude, Cameron and Hague, especially. A less ruined, less narcotised population would be calling for their removal.

mrs narcolept said...

It seems a very complicated way of donating a helicopter and a few guns to the cause.

call me ishmael said...

Mr Hague is about to make it all clear to us, mrs n, in ay statement to the house, setting out all the reasons for him making these tough, but necessary and right decisions, even though they are wrong. Tory cheers, hear-hear, for he's a jolly good homo etc., etc. It's a cup of tea and a coalition digestive biscuit for me, in front of the telly.

mrs narcolept said...

There you are, it was all just a Serious Misunderstanding.

Not exactly standing room only in the Commons; where are they all? You would think they would make more of an effort to turn up knowing that people might notice they aren't there.

call me ishmael said...

And there was only the vile McShane who asked the big question. Well, one of the big questions.

Anonymous said...

Leif Goodwin says: The fact that you use the unfortunate events in Hague's private life to make fun of him is disgraceful and sickening. Your constant use of the terms nig nogs and other offensive terms for foreigners is offensive. Your articles are not even funny, although a school child might be amused. As far as I can tell you do not reveal your identity. It is all too easy to publish such attacks on people when done anonymously. Do you have the balls to make those remarks face to face with the people you abuse? I bet not.