Friday, 5 November 2010


Top hacks at the BBC are striking for a day or two and a nation is plunged into ignorance as the Today programme is pulled, together with an episode of Newsnight. Fiona Bruce said she was worth every penny of her pension  and wouldn't accept  a penny less from an ungrateful nation, Nobody knows how hard it is swanning around the Antiques Roadshow and smirking fetchingly, said the neurotic presenter, And I get my kit off for  Children in Need.


It's simple, look you, isn't it, said top newsreader, Huw Welshman, the people need some pompous , overpaid prat like me to read them all the made-up news, isn't it, otherwise how will they know what the govament wants them to believe, look you?

From the Filth-O-Graph

Writing on his blog this morning, BBC director general Mark Thompson said:

Mr Mark BeardyGit, TopGit at the BBC.

"We believe that much of the drivel on the BBC will be unaffected by this action. However, it is inevitable that some programmes and content will be disrupted, although thankfully not EastEnders or the cooking and housebuying shows, which remain crucial to the quality of our ouput.  But most of them are rubbish, the current affairs stuff, talking heads pontificating,  talking arses more like;  I mean, who gives a fuck about Newsnight, really, who cares about Paxman, man's a pantomime turn?"

"It has never been more important to ensure the BBC is spending every penny of licence fee payers money wisely on talent like me and delivering the quality programmes and services audiences want. And that is why I am worth a million pounds a year, and all the trimmings.  We believe the current pension proposals are realistic and affordable, and will provide fair pension provision for BBC staff for the future, whilst my own will remain huge and entirely undeserved. Along with my peerage.  If I do as I'm told. Lord BeardyGit of Shepherds Bush, has a nice ring to it, donchathink. pompous and shit at the same time, just like me.". 

"This has been a difficult period for staff. However, the people who lose out most in any strike action are the very people we are here to serve - the govament.  And the people I sack, of course.  They lose out, too,  but it's in their best interests, I have it on good authority from Chancellor Spunkface, himself, or is it herself." 

A BBC spokeswoman said: "We are disappointed that the NUJ have gone ahead with today's industrial action.
"This is despite the other four unions accepting our revised offer, and feedback from staff that indicates the same.  We don't know why everybody can't be, just, you know, obedient, like good citizens should.  Everybody knows that the unelected govament frowns on disobedience, especially now, that we're all in it together, trying to crush the poor and lowpaid, in their best interests, just as Chancellor Spunkface says,

"It is the public who lose out and we apologise to our audience for any disruption to services. And for Jonafun Woss, Graham Norton, Kirsty Wark, Paxoman, John and Jim and Sarah Harridan and the Dimbledums and all those producer cunts on the Feedback programme, telling viewers and listeners how stupid they are. And then there's the licensed fools, Hislop and that mad, creepy ,mental patient, Merton, you may not have a job for life, or even for this year, but they do. Satirists? On the BBC?  My arse.  Andrew Neil, he's another one, although you won't catch him on strike, rotten, scabbing, Murdoch-cock sucking bastard; we apologise for them, too. And now, the weather where you are"


mrs narcolept said...

It was lovely this morning to hear East Anglian birdwatching during breakfast instead of John Humphreys snarling at some slithering politician.

Agatha said...

A risky strategy, this, as BBC consumers everywhere may take Mrs. Narcolept's view and decide that they infinitely prefer the Beeb's output during the strike days. The thing about strike action is that it is supposed to throw a spanner in the works; it is supposed to withdraw a service that people want and cause as much disruption as possible. This strike reminds me of when we used to threaten strike action as Probation Officers, just to gain the lofty comment: "And who, pray, would that inconvenience?"

Oldrightie said...

They're on strike? I just thought the programmes had been improved.

jgm2 said...

Saw a bunch of the whining cunts on the pavement in Tunbridge Wells today. Whining about something or other. Funny thing is - they weren't there at 11 o'clock but were at 12 o'clock.

I know that 'cos I walked past at 11 o'clock and said 'Oh, what's that then? Never seen a BBC shop before' and no sign of the fuckers. Must have been on a tea break from striking or something.

Came back at 12 o'clock and there they are. A dozen or so of 'em.

Fuck 'em.

P45 is too good for them.

Dick the Prick said...

My cap is doffed.