Sunday, 15 August 2010



Nothing wrong with us being a nation of shopkeepers but CallHimDave only seems to value the filthy rich ones, like this joker, Mr Sir Philip Green, boss of TopMan and the RagTrade's premier party animal, bless his bloated Viagra-flooded  corpulence.

Green, an oily, fat bastard, claims that his experise in importing cheap clothing from foreign sweatshops and in managing his tax affairs in a less than patriotic fashion, qualifies he and one of his bumboys to audit public spending over the past three years, see if it offers value for money. Seeing as how this old pig imports from places where wages and conditions are to say the least exploitative, even by Tory fuckpig standards,  we could put money on him finding NewLabour to be villainously incompetent and the boy, CallHimDave, virtue personified.


In May 2007 after the disappearance of Madeleine McCann in Portugal, Green donated £250,000 as a monetary reward for any useful public information.[5] He also provided the McCanns with the use of his private jet to allow them to fly to Rome for a Papal visit and back in time to put their twins to bed.[6] Green intends to increase the reward money to £1 million for the safe return of Madeleine.

Tax avoidance

Taveta Investments, the company used to acquire Arcadia in 2002, is in the name of Green's wife, Cristina Green, a Monaco resident, avoiding millions of pounds in tax that would be payable if a UK resident owned the company.[19] When Green paid his family £1.2bn in 2005, it was paid for by a loan taken out by Arcadia, cutting Arcadia's corporation tax as interest charges on the loan were offset against profits.[20] In comparison, staff at Arcadia were told in 2005 that members of its final salary pension scheme must increase contributions by half and work five years longer to qualify for the same payout.[citation needed]

 Excessive pay

Green has fallen under criticism for taking excessive pay, earned through his shareholdings in Arcadia. In 2005, he declared a dividend in Arcadia, in which he had a holding of 92% of the shares. This meant he earned £1.2 billion in a single year. Green defended himself by saying, "So far as I'm concerned we are in the risk business. We risk our reputation and our money when we buy things. We don't have a guarantee on the back we can get a refund when we haven't got it right."[21]

Asset stripping

There have also been accusations that Philip Green is an asset-stripper as seen with his experiences with Owen Owen and the purchase of the UK arm of Etam which have seen a wide sell-off of stores. Philip Green denies this accusation.[22]

We should look forward to the imbecile, Sugar, being installed in some Czarish role, perhaps at the NHS, patients who displease him being discharged, untreated.
In addition to Mr Sir Philip auditing the nation's affairs, one of the most brazen of Blairites, another former NewLab health seckatry working for PharmaCorp, instead of being in prison,  is to join CallHimDave's (ie my) payroll as, what  is it now, social mobility adviser.

If the Coalition manages  nothing else, with this tosser and Miss Frank Field it is rapidly exposing the myth of NewLabour being the People's Party. 

We said this about the gobby Geordie wanker  and PepsiBoy last year.

Saturday, 25 July 2009


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Social mobility ? Cunt. Working class, doped-up, idle bastard Trots like him can always betray their class by sucking the right Labour knobs, in his case the foreskins of Kinnock and Blair, and be rewarded with cabinet positions and subsequent lifetime sinecures.
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The career anti-racist – like Milburn and nearly everyone else in parliament - can always sign up to an illegal invasion in which the wog dead are not even counted; can preside over the meanest, most divisive welfare system in Europe, in which the eldery are the frozen few and the disabled are institutionaly despised; can devise an incomprehensible education system which his chums, like Lardy Abbott, so endorse that they by-pass it altogether, using money hustled from the poor to buy their brats special treatment and then they can bring forward proposals, chiding, superior and hectoring, like fucking Presbyterians, to correct the very fuck-ups for which they are responsible. There’s only one thing that thieving, idle, arrogant, smirking, sticky-fingered, useless, heathen bastard cocksucker, Milburn, needs and that’s a quick rub-down with a housebrick and throwing down a mineshaft, give him some subterranean social mobility, of the permanent variety.
Meantime, quite why this mouthy tosser needed to suddenly, instantaneously spend more time with his obviously judgement-impaired partner and brats is probably known only to a few in some clandestine Mandelson-Campbell charmed circle of disinformation but if anyone has any ideas it is their duty to share them; it is the right thing to do, for the country.

Alan Milburn (left,) and Charles Clarke have been agitating for leadership change from the backbench
Former Health Secretary Alan Milburn has landed a lucrative post as an adviser to soft drinks giant PepsiCo.
The company is best known for recruiting stars such as David Beckham, Britney Spears and Beyonce to promote its products.
But it is turning to Mr Milburn to help fight the backlash against unhealthy snacks and drinks. He will sit on an advisory board looking at how the company can build a healthier product range.
A spokesman for PepsiCo in the UK said: "What we are doing is following the precedent of our US company. The new committee has been set up to look at health and wellness and environmental sustainability.
"We believe the UK business will benefit from outside expertise, and Alan Milburn's track record will be of enormous value to our strategic direction."

From the Daily Filth-O-Mail

In other words Milburn receives 25 grand a year for having his name on the letterhead and taking Pepsi executives for drinks on the Westminster terrace, subsidised, of course, by the rest of us. O brave new, Geordie world, that has such people in't. Bonny lad.


mongoose said...

Sorry about Green but that is what uber-capitalists do.

Milburn? Quite obviously a useless, mediocre-at-best, waste of oxygen from the first day I was ever aware of his name. He and Blunkett cheeks of that same arse that keeps on showing itself. Off they go to help iDave. Silly born bastards, have they no idea?

I kid you not but someone behind Cameron has this really well worked out. LibDems down 50%; the Luvvies ratting a sinking ship. If he can just keep the havoc from the streets through next summer, it will be a generation before he has done with us. Christ, even the Beeb is getting onside - though slowly and with teeth gritted.

He may just keep it together. And we have not yet even had a peek at the ruination of the reputation of McDoom. When the numbers hit the fan, Gordon will be lucky to escape with his life, the horrible bastard.

call me ishmael said...

Never mind gritted teeth, listening to te Westminster Hour, just now, it seems as though Broadcasting House is the third coalescee.

Who is the somebody, by the way, any ideas?

call me ishmael said...
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call me ishmael said...

It is a compelling forecast, mr m but excludes any consideration of Events, Dear Boy, the fact that politicians are shit-eating reptiles and many will be piqued, firstly by their jobs going to toilet-creeping Cleggites like Laws and now the toboggan monitor and buffoon, wotsisname, DannyBoy and secondly at these sort of positions going to the frightful Frank Field, John Denham, is it, or Hutton and now to Blair's representative, the turd Milburn, lets face it, these fuckers are in it for themselves and for many the Coalition is a road to Nowhere.

Fifty seats are to go, there is talk of an election pact or deal, should they go the distance, in which some more Tories will be asked to put their cocks on the chopping block and then there is the now commonly voiced view, that benefits will not be reformed but simply withdrawn.

As to premier Snot, well, he's yesterday's news, I can't see people swallowing Brown's To Blame indefinitely, not when they're being repossessed.

Take heart, Cameron is just a PR shit with nasty, inbred, gangster instincts, probably quite exciting on honeymoon but a bit much otherwise. As for Clegg, he's an even emptier vessel, how many seats did he win them last time? None, that was it.

yardarm said...

This is wysteria Dave, who attacked benefit bludgers the other day and now brings in tax bludger Green to advise on the nation`s finances ?

When individual ministers and MP`s have to justify cuts to all the people who wanted cuts but only for someone else and now start getting angry about it we`ll see the fracture lines in the Cuntalition emerge and the pallid prat Osbourne plummet wailing through the cracks, abandoned by Cast Iron Dave in order to cling to power.

Blaming the previous chump isn`t working out so well now for Detroit`s Greatest Youth Club Organiser and Milburn is a true Blairite in that he`s merely a money sucking void in the shape of a homo sapiens.

Humpty Bumpty said...

'For Madeleine's SAFE return'?

Green could increase this reward tenfold and his money would be safe.

Kate and Gerry McCann know Madeleine is dead.

You can put £10m on it.

RealHumptyB on Twitter

mongoose said...

Well, Mr Ishmael, the Luvvies still prattle that that Maggie is responsible for everything and she hasn't been in power for twenty years. McDoom was either Chancellor or PM for all of his lot's go. Blair has escaped and has left McDoom to be the New Maggie.

It is scarcely believable, I know, but I think that the one behind the Liberal Ambush section of policy is Letwin. Real political reptiles know that unless the opposition are rabid nutters, you have to have the centre. And even if they are nutters and you start on your own ground, you have to take the centre to hold onto power. Letwin gets this, even if he is a slash-and-burn man with the other side of his brain.

Cameron is using the early season sun to dazzle everyone with his shiny new, Liberal cricket bat. And he is using the likes of Redwood - who seemingly complain that the cuts aren't cuts, they're just a slowing of increased spending - to silence the Right. The Luvvies are prostrate, choosing which minnow to lead them. Clegg is repenting at leisure, fucked not by a handsome Prince but by a succession of Tory frogs. So there is no need from Cameron's point of view to have any drama. The wolf can stay in its sheep's clothing. For now.

When the numbers hit the fan, as they surely must, and soon, McDoom will be the slayer of babies, the vile waster of OAPs' pension monies, the bastard who sent "Our Brave Lads" out to fight with threadbare kit. The cuts will be McDoom's fault. The Treasury number-crunchers even now are drawing up the scandalous spreadsheets. They - and it will Honourable Liberal members - will rip the poor mad bugger to pieces. How Cable will swallow this remains to be seen but he is dead anyway, and he knows it.

I thought that the Coalition would struggle to make it to Christmas but the modest upturn in the apparent economic numbers, temporary though it is, has given Cameron gasping room. Even a few public sector strikes this winter would help. "The dead once again lie unburied." He must now make it through to next spring's budget without unhelpful incident - without, as you say, Dear Boy, "Events" - and then try to hold it together through the summer without riot and bloodshed. The only flies in the ointment are the mad right-wingers of the Tories. Can they be kept onside, quiet and invisible? The only way out for the Liberals is if the Tories swing right - appear to swing right because the economic slaughter is more visible than One Nation, Big Society Letwinism. Cameron now won't let that happen. He has got them all in the same lifeboat, all in it together, except for him.

call me ishmael said...

Easy now, mr humpty, Gerry and Cilla are the real celebrity victims here, let's not forget that. And any suggestion that Mr SIr Phil or Mr Sir Richard or, indeed, even young parent, Mr Gordon Snot are nothing but self-publicising fucking hypocrites is unworthy of us and as remedy we should all make a donation to the find Madeleine Fund............(the sound of hollow laughter echoes around CyberStreet.)

call me ishmael said...

Thanks, mr mongoose. Much of what you say is accurate - Redwood behaves as you say, Cameron would be wise to avoid drama at all costs, Letwin is a shit but an emollient one, empathising in the way that only public schoolboys can with the pain of others, Goodness me, wasn't he burgled? In his own house?, Well, his town house ? - but obviously it is only accurate inasfar as things remain static - and they don't.

We are all in danger of thinking that so-called journalism and blog comment can divine and reflect the majority view and likely outcomes - and it can't. One of the common illusions - an outcome wished for but unrealised - is that Labour suffered a cataclysmic defeat at the last election and is therefore toast - even though it didn't and isn't. Like the Tories, it simply failed to win a majority; it may have lost a lot of seats but it had a lot of seats to start with. It is only by this bogus coalition that Cameron enjoys some power for now, nobody voted for it although the same mediawhores who so trumpeted Cameron's non-existent competence prior to and during the election insist that there is all but complete approval, that a relieved nation cheers a ship of fools and spivs. Actually, in terms of political competence and experience, the NewLab Oxbridge boys are more capable than are the NewToryLib Oxbridge boys, not that that means a whole lot.

Mr yardarm's is the sensible assessment of the appetite for cuts, they are alright for other people, and once they start to bite, unless I am very much mistaken and I may well be, the Coalition can not but sunder and an election be called. Sooner the fucking better.

mongoose said...

Letwin? Horrible bastard but not a coward.

No, no, there is no comfort here, Mr Ishmael. Labour were hammered but just a little less hammered than we thought they'd be, and they started at the top of a Gerrymandered mountain. It is true that Labour did better than anyone expected, and that the Twin Bastards did a tad worse but that is only true when we measure the House of Commons outcome.

Disillusionment screwed them all and denied Cameron his triumph. Praise Be. Disillusionment with politics hurts them all but it in the end it kills Labour deader. Plenty of Tory-leaning voters didn't vote but they will never vote for anyone else now. The New Labour Cs and Ds have washed their hands of the Luvvies. They are lost now, with kids and mortgages, dead McDoom about to fuck them.

I think that you may have it wrong too in the competence stakes. Cameron, the swine, is playing a blinder. Who can beat him? Harriet? Millitwat Either? Burnham? Fucking Abbot? Clegg? Balls? Cable? They are all dead.

Only the Conservative right can kill Cameron. And they won't. Not for a decade. Like Maggie he will get his decade. Fuck me, I have lived too long.

Oh, and Events. Pray, Mr Ishmael, for Events. A live boy or a dead girl would do the trick.

yardarm said...

The critcial relationship in the gov`t might not be Cameron and Clegg but Cameron and Osborne. The relations between First and Second Lords of the Treasury have often proved crucial to an administration`s fortunes.

The only thing of which we can be certain is that, in one shape or another, Events, as Mr Mongoose says, will arrive.

The dog's bollocks said...

Events will come and go, but the Politics will survive as long as divide and rule is the order of the House.
Two fleas fighting over who owns the dog is an irritation, until Buster gets that back leg into gear.

call me ishmael said...

It was me said it first, events. I'm tired of not getting any credit round here.

Colonel von Fawkes gets Sieg Heil Mein Fuhrer, let us roast these palestinian children und warm our Pizzas on their embers, Jawohl; the tobacconist, Mr Old Holborn gets Yes, We will all dress in masks and follow you to the barricades (but not really), Mrs Woman On A Raft gets Oh, such writing and Ms Lillith and Mr Berserk get Oh, yes, everything is lovely in the garden. And what do I get? I get You're wrong, Mr Ishmael, you're wrong. And on top of that when I do say something that somebody agrees with they say somebody else said it. Events, it was me.

call me ishmael said...

Had the Foxtrotting Nitwit or Straight Simon led the Toileteers then we would be rejoicing in the renewed premiership of Gordon Snot; that's not a hammering, that's just an anomaly and we are governed now as a direct result of the personal animosity between Mr Snot and the gibbering, self-interrogating, public school poltroon, Clegg; from such one cannot build the thesis you offer, Mr mongoose, internally consistent and persuasive though it is and a joy to read.

This invocation of Churchillian values, this putrid confection of AllInItTogetherness -especially coming on top of the now neutralised but not entirely dead expenses crimes - will not stand, not without Dorniers and Junkers blitzing the docksides. The only war going on is between Them and Us. And there are more of Us than there are of Them. Ribaldry and contempt and unfailing scepticism, these should be our tools, never mind curling up like a beaten dog; they are cheeks of the same arse and we should kick them equally. Lost in the rain, mr mongoose, negativity won't pull you through.

call me ishmael said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
call me ishmael said...

Buster's back leg is fine, thanks, or as fine as it can be in a centenarian, mr db; it twitches when he sleeps, which is often but bears his weight and sometimes propels him at light speed after the cats who taunt him so. It is a handy metaphor, though, deprived of he so long the focus of our righteous indignation, we limp around, as though the damning of this shower of fuckpigs was unreasonable, unpatriotic, as though being shat upon by Old Etonians is a more fragrant, more palatable experience than was being covered in Manse-shit. We must give the Coalition a chance, aye, right, a chance to squat down on the Great Latrine Of State and get their bowels opening three times a day; it's what they came into politics to do.

mongoose said...

I don't condone or endorse, Mr Ishmael. I just describe what I think is going on. Cameron saw that the Tories had failed to win their shoo-in. He turned relative disaster into power and a mechanism for keeping it. Wallflower Clegg was bedded for a packet of peanuts. McSnot clung for five days to the doorpost of No. 10 and screwed what little chance Labour had of a deal. They both should have stepped aside and let Cameron have a minority government. He would have been dust and debris by this time next year with all the savagery writ large on his Wiki page.

But you are right enough. There are other places to discuss the niceties of political tactics. You did ask though.

call me ishmael said...

Woah, hang on, I never accused anyone of condone-ism or endorsementism and I do value others' views; my main concern is that we may well be doing that thing, that self-fulfilling prophecy thing, endorsing, if you like, via despair.

Case in point. The Jock Herald, just for example, for a couple of years before it happened, spoke of the Brown Succession, without irony or cavil; enough people said it enough times and it happened, even thouigh it was totally anti-democratic, anti-Labour Party. If enough people say that the Coalition is necessary or legitimate or unavoidable then the Bullingdon Boy spivs will triumph, that's my point.

I agree, by the way, a minority government would have seen them off. A pox on the toiletmen.

mongoose said...

"Endorsing via despair." Bob will be stealing your lyrics soon.