Monday, 14 September 2009
Famous Heterophobe told: FUCK OFF BALDY!!!
Lady Sir Elton John, the most improbably successful warbler in history, having but two tunes to his name, a slow one with arpeggios and a faster one without, has been told by the Romanian authorities that he is a horrid, fat, bad-tempered little degenerate.
Knighted by the Whore-Emperor Blair, long term cocaine addict, Lady Sir Elton and his husband, Mrs David Furnish, had announced that a Romanian orphan - no ordinary orphan but an AIDS-orphan, you see, showbiz gradation, even in orphanhood, the disgusting fucking bastards - had "stolen their hearts" and they wanted, Lady Sir Elton in his sixties and Mrs Furnish in his late-forties, to adopt the child and bring him back home to witness their spats and squabbles and tantrums and hair-pullings and unspeakable extravagance - Lady Sir Elton and Mrs Furnish being celebrated for little else. It was as though Sir Elton and his husband had spotted a new vulgar work of art and simply had to have it, darling. Spontaneous, consumer parenthood; what a pair of tossers.
Fuck off, has been the response of the Romanians. And quite right, too.