Friday 18 September 2009

WHAT THE PAPERS SAY. UNCLE SAM, THE IGNOBLE SAVAGE.

Romell Broom to face execution next week following botched lethal injection

• Romell Broom convicted of rape and murder of teenager
• Case raises question about Texas man facing execution



Ohio is to try again to execute a man convicted of murder after his death by lethal injection was botched earlier this week when technicians spent two hours in a futile hunt for a vein able to take a needle.

At one point, Romell Broom, who was convicted of rape and murder of a teenage girl 25 years ago, tried to help prison officers find a suitable vein by moving around and flexing his muscles. The prison governor later thanked him for his cooperation.

What critics of the death penalty are describing as the "virtually unprecedented" failure of the attempt to execute Broom, 53, has again raised questions over its continued use in the US. Concerns have also been raised over a case in Texas in which a man is facing execution despite an admission by the judge and prosecutor in his trial that they were lovers.

Prison officers described how, after about an hour of hunting for a suitable vein, Broom helped them by turning on to his side, by moving rubber tubing along his arm and by flexing his hand and muscles. At one point, technicians found what appeared to be a suitable vein but it collapsed as they inserted a needle, apparently because of past drug use.

Broom, who was convicted of kidnapping, raping and killing 14-year-old Tryna Middleton, became so distressed that he lay on his back and covered his face with both hands. One of the execution team handed him a toilet roll to wipe away tears.

The prison director, Terry Collins, contacted Ohio's governor, Ted Strickland, to tell him of the difficulties. The governor issued a temporary reprieve.
Collins later thanked the condemned man for what he said was the respect he showed toward the execution team and for the way he endured the ordeal.

One of Broom's lawyers, Adele Shank, who witnessed the failed execution, said her client was clearly in pain.

"It was obviously a flawed process," she said. "He survived this execution attempt, and they really can't do it again. It was cruel and unusual punishment."

Broom's legal team has now asked Ohio's supreme court to cancel the execution but state officials today said they will attempt it again next week.

The Death Penalty Information Centre in Washington said that the botched attempt is the first of its kind since the electric chair failed to kill a murderer, Willie Francis, in Louisiana in 1946. Francis argued that a second attempt to execute him would be unconstitutional but the supreme court ruled otherwise and he was electrocuted the following year.

"This is virtually unprecedented," said the DPIC's director, Richard Dieter, said of the Broom case. "The public in the US are increasingly jaded about the death penalty. There is evidence of innocent people executed, prosecutors sleeping with judges and being ignored, failed executions. At some point enough is going to be enough and even people who support the death penalty are going to let it go".

There are fresh questions about the legal process around the death penalty in Texas, which carries out by far the largest number of executions in the US. The state's court of criminal appeals has turned down an appeal from a man on the brink of execution who said there were questions over the fairness of his trial after it was revealed that the judge and prosecutor kept secret that they were lovers. Charles Hood was convicted of the 1989 robbery and murder of two people.

The appeals court said that the defence should have raised the issue of the affair at the original appeal. But defence lawyers said that it was no more than a rumour at the time and was only confirmed by another official in the prosecutor's office hours before Hood was originally to have been executed last year. The two people involved later confirmed their affair.

One of Hood's lawyers, David Dow, called the decision "gutless" and the American Bar Association ethics committee described it as a "blot on the Texas judiciary".

Texas is also grappling with revelations that it may have executed an innocent man five years ago after he was convicted of murdering his three children through arson on the basis of deeply flawed "scientific" evidence that has been compared to the stuff of witch trials.


"......preserve America as the greatest nation on Earth and the last, best hope for mankind."

George Executioner Bush junior, drunk, draft-dodger, coke fiend, wife-beater, fraudster, coward, torturer, former president, former proprietor of Texas. And according to Gordon Snot, Britain's best friend.


"I still believe that America is the last, best hope of Earth. We just have to show the world why this is so."

Barack Obama, 23rd April 2007, Harvard law professor, career politician and current president of the United States.







47 comments:

Elby the Beserk said...

Are they selling postcards of it?...

mongoose said...

Mr Ishmael,

RACE OF PRISONERS CURRENTLY ON DEATH ROW

BLACK: 1,371 (41.58%)
HISPANIC: 374 (11.34%)
WHITE: 1,475 (44.74%)
OTHER: 77 (2.33%)

RACE OF DEFENDANTS EXECUTED IN THE U.S. SINCE 1976

BLACK: 393 (34.6%)
HISPANIC: 78 (6.87%)
WHITE: 643 (56.6%)
OTHER: 22 (0.62%)

RACE OF VICTIMS RESULTING IN AN EXECUTION SINCE 1976

BLACK: 239 (14.2%)
HISPANIC: 82 (4.87%)
WHITE: 1324 (78.67%)
OTHER: 38 (1.96%)

The moral of this story, the moral of this song, is don't kill whitey.

Fucking lunatics. A horrible, mad, freak show of a country. Fifteen thousand murders per year.

call me ishmael said...

Thanks Mr mongoose

And would you please not stare at me like that, the most salient statistic is that according to the US 2005 census, whites make up 80.2% of the population, blacks 12.8%. (Many Hisopanics, who as a category alone make up over 14 % also figure as White Hispanics in the Whites figure, such accounting giving a figure in excess of 100 per cent.) Blacks on Death Row therefore, proportionally, outnumber whites by six-and-a-half to one; in executions by three to one. I think that the imprisonment ratio is far worse than six to one, as is the lock-down in mediaeval maximum security for nine hundred and ninety nine years. Property ownership among ethnicities is also wildly disparate as is access, therefore, to bail and competent lawyers; poverty,segregation, centuries in slavery cannot but have disadvantaged the so called Afro-American in the US criminal justice system; the figures which you report set against those above emphasise his sorry condition, still, in the land of the free, rather than his inherent criminality.

The moral of the story, the moral of this song, is simply that one should never be where one does not belong and if we judge by his treatment, historical and current, the black man surely does not belong in the home of the brave, upon whose vicious redneck denizens a hard rain must surely fall.

mongoose said...

Mr Ishmael,

Indeed - all of that. And another stat I picked up on the search is they reckon that 28% of black men will serve time in prison at some time or another.

Grisly, horrible bastard place.

PT Barnum said...

"The public in the US are increasingly jaded about the death penalty."

The obvious answer, to re-engage the overstuffed, undereducated masses of the United States of Apathy, is to televise executions, following a lottery to decide who gets it on tonight's show. Fox Network, obviously.

Otherwise, words fail me. The last and greatest hope of rendering the Earth a squalid, festering deathfest.

kanye vest said...

"I still believe that America is the last, best hope of Earth. We just have to show the world why this is so."


Barack Obama, 23rd April 2007, Harvard law professor, career politician and current president of the United States.


obama? hey, i mean no disrespect, but senator john mccain would have made the greatest united states president of all time.

criss cock said...

22:21

what a motherfucking killer

The Dyer's Garden said...

Well, the Chinese do not "belong" either yet they exhibit far lower levels of criminality.

But I suppose it soothes the sentimental vanity to see it in black & white, as it were, so why not dianify this subject along with everyfuckingthing else.

call me ishmael said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
call me ishmael said...

The Chinese didn't usually travel to the New World chained below decks with corks up their arses to be sold on an auction block; or is that too sentimental a telling of history?

That would be Dianify, wouldn't it, were it a word

spark up said...

22:21

obama is a busy man with heaps of serious business to which he must attend (such as killing in afghanistan, killing debt and killing prisoners) and he had no business sticking his nose into show-business, unless he intended to comment on the latent frustracism with the music business which provoked west's premature outburst - but the president was too shy to explore the race angle, having himself made rather a botched job of the war on racism in afghanistan...although he still hopes to eliminate the big r by utilizing a radical new surgical attack strategy which consists in executing every darkie he can find there...a masterstroke of political and diplomatic manoeuvring which should shut-up the awkward anti-western afghan vote for good. in the event, barack obama contained himself, on this occasion, to singling out, for his rudeness, a black man who would gain more respect by distancing himself from the music industry's corruption before criticizing it.

hay zee said...

22:21

i disagree, barack obama is a very discriminating politician who knows on which side his bread is buttered

The Dyer's Garden said...

Too common and revolting a thing even to keep the capital letter. Did you think I mistyped and thought it important to correct me? If so, I am in your debt, and so are all your readers.

And you are quite right; were it not for the evils of western imperialism, subsaharan Africa would be a heaven of prosperity and peace: the most astonishingly creative civilisation, from which - let us not forget - those showy Greeks were unimaginatively derivative. And, of course, none was complicit in enslaving his own kind. And it is right that we should feel guilty for an eternity thereafter that the slaughter was not reversed (for this is not what they would have done to us, no, violence being so obviously alien to their nature). And so on and on and on, I've read all about it in those american secondary school textbooks that tell us that life in Periclean Athens was terrible because they did not have fridges, antibiotics, pornotube, or a universal charter of human fucking rights.

call me ishmael said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
call me ishmael said...

There was a family saying, often applied to my late brother, a man, Mr The Dyer's Garden, convinced - as are you yourself - of his moral and intellectual invincibility, bless him. It was, Ah, Joe, he's as well raving there as raving in bed, for he'd only fall out of bed.

Bluster as you may, you know full well that here, at any rate, we capitalise proper nouns; the notion that we may do as we please in matters of grammar as alien to you as it is to me; insufficiently graceful to accept a rebuke which you would be swift to administer to others you now, suborned by Ruin, invent a Gardeners' Guide to Optional Punctuation on the basis of Perceived Merit. Pull yourself together, man.

I feel no showy guilt for slavery just for the arse-numbing stupidity of those of my peers who submit loftily that its effects do not reverberate down through the generations, manifesting themselves in criminality.

You deliberately conflate sentiment with sentimentality; who would not be revolted by the procedures described in the Guardian report, of incompetent executioners thanking their intended victim for his futile assistance, of a legislature insisting that the process be played-out again in future to some satisfactory conclusion ?

The "belonging" referred to was just my clumsy continuation of a motif from popular culture, assayed first, obliquely, by mr elby and then by mr mongoose; if you attended more regularly I would perhaps not be so joylessly taxed by explaining these things to you.

I look forward to some Greco-Roman allegory explaining how a noun can be a verb, a singular a plural, just as long as it's a scholarly chap talking like a cunt and not a peasant.

The Dyer's Garden said...

And there you were, only a few posts back, berating others for banging on about punctuation while having little understanding of the sense it is meant to help convey.

No inconsistency, either, in denying Jews the use of the past as a justification for the present while allowing it for Africans.

One of course, gives you the opportunity to indulge your feelings of self-conscious sympathy and the other does not. That is what sentimentality is - emotion aimed not at the object but the subject itself - and you should not need me to diagnose it in yourself.

And now you fret and scratch ineffectually: what is this but the "second childishness"?

mongoose said...

Gentlemen, gentlemen,

Millions and millions of God's children - many of them are white! - are caught in an airtight trap of poverty in the midst of an affluent society. I'd like to stay here tonight. But I ihave to go back to the valley. I go back with a faith that the truth crushed earth shall rise again... [snip] I go back with a faith that you shall reap what you sow.

And there it is.

Can we not just agree that killing people is wrong - even in Texas, and even yous Godforsaken fuckers who can't punctuate a sentence like a daycent, fucking human being. Can we not see that the postcards of a hanging are the moral equivalent of some poor bastard squirming on a gurney as the hearltess, vile flunkey bastards try to find a vein. Ah, fuck it, we'll try again next week, shall we?

Daisy said...

Dear Mr Ishmael,

I would humbly beg to differ with your assertion that Mr Gardenia is a man convinced of his own intellectual invincibility. It is precisely because he is not that he lingers here.

There is no doubt, of course, of his soaring and utterly pretentious intellectual arrogance and it is this, combined with his unacknowledged recognition that what is produced here would be beyond his own small ability, that causes him to return, picking senselessly again and again at the scab of his not so latent insecurity.

What he really wants, of course, is to be told to go fuck himself, slowly, with a red hot poker, then he could retire gracefully, safe again in the knowledge that you couldn't deal with his greater wisdom and erudition. The daft cunt.

Much as I, and no doubt other congregants, gain some minor amusement from watching you lead him by the nose until he inevitably crashes and burns, over and over again, I do wonder why you take the trouble. You must have the patience of a saint, obviously.

call me ishmael said...

I only scourge you with your own flail, Mr TDG, it is you and not I, obviously, so concerned about punctuation, so precise, so demanding propriety in others yet excusing sloppiness in yourself as artistic license or as some sort of punctuational correctness the rules of which are known only to yourself, some lingusitic megalomania, what you say is correct because you say it. A larger man would just acknowledge a slip of the finger in your misspelling of Diana, but no, we await Plato and Socrates, marshaled in defence of your right to bully others,less educated, yet remain, yourself, hallowed and protected, beyond criticism or correction.

There is absolutely no inconsistency in deploring a Zionist and racist and fundamentalist successiion of atrocities in the Middle East and complaining on behalf of a racial minority oppressed and abused for centuries in a land not its own. There is no historical justification for the Israeli state torturing Arab children, in order that some Old Testament prophecy might be fulfilled and there is no comparison between state terrorism and the undoubted criminal behaviour of many blacks, in the US and here. There is not, either, any excuse or justification for the treatment of the man who is the subject of this post; if you disagree with that, you are in the wrong place,my friend, you'd better leave, find somewhere less sentimental, there are many redneck sites supporting capital punishment, misogyny and racism. You'll find them just next door; follow the smell of Pizza.

Rebuke me not, Mr mongoose, for keeping the flame you fan yourself.

call me ishmael said...

Ah, mr daisy, how can we regret the closure, the banning of dissent elsewhere, if we suppress it here; the more nit-picking, cheese-paring it is, the greater the duty to counter it in like terms, in the hope, perhaps forlorn, of developing, through skirmish, a unity of cognisance, agreement, at least, that torture and oppression are wrong and no vastness of historical perspective, no amount of effete sophistry makes them right; such is the optimism so regulary decried here as sentimentality, even though it brought us out from the oceans and - dare one unschooled say it - to the Pantheon.

The Dyer's Garden said...

I thanked you for your correction, Mr Smith, but why bother with the text when you can so easily supply the thought on behalf of others? And maybe you should thank Stanislav for pointing out the inconsistency you are too grand a man yourself to admit to: http://mrishmael.blogspot.com/2009/08/stanislav-young-polish-grammarian.html

That tens of thousands of people of all races suffer because of our tolerance (borne of a profound misconception of racism) of the criminal subculture that pervades black communities is of course no match for the hundreds that die in a struggle that is emotionally so much more theatrical. That is the element that is arguably objectionable, not the case of the man that is the subject of the post. You know well enough what I think of american society, even if you didn't bother to read the last sentence of my last post but one.

Sad to see you are still nursing your wounds, Daisy, but they were all self-inflicted. But the question you raise is an interesting one: what is the point of exposing an intellectual position to attack where neither winning nor losing is of the slightest consequence? This will give you a clue: the owl of Minerva spreads its wings only with the falling of dusk.

mongoose said...

I did not realise that there was a history of imbecility, Mr Ishmael.

Going to the carnival tonight?

Daisy said...

The line about self-inflicted wounds is becoming old, Mr Gardenia, do try and add something original to your repertoire, just for a change.

It would be a mistake, also, to cling to the belief that those who offer you the benefit of constructive criticism can only be acting from some hidden motivation.

I can assure you that, contrary to your belief, my opinion that you are a worthless, arrogant cunt is sincerely held.

mongoose said...

Mr Dyers Garden,

There is no criminal subculture pervading black communities (preferentially); there is only a desperation, isolation and desolation subculture pervading poor communities - white and black alike. And if a single mum is poor, and if she is unskilled and untutored, and if her parents were similarly disadvantaged, and if she has not the shoulders of giants on which to stand, and if her kids are hungry, and she goes out at five in the morning and does a bit of cash work - on her knees cleaning shit-holes in the concrete palaces of Mammon - to feed her wains and put shoes on their feet, is this "wrong"? Morally and absolutely wrong because she paid no tax? The criminal bitch! Where is my rope? (And the fucking NI contributions too! Christ, is there no end to her evil?) No, Sir, this is called something else - with one fewer letters.

And now that moral relativism stalks the burning land and ordinary error, let alone desperation, is called criminality, and our rulers, even the Attorney General, just piss in our faces, and nobody has so much as raised an eyebrow, I can share with you that what you think, behind your eyes, to be right or wrong is not necessarily a constant. It isn't behind everyone else's eyes. Walk a mile in Mr Gandhi's sandals and see what you think.

You will find your answer, if answer you seek, in charity, kindness, gentleness, generosity of spirit and an open heart.

Everybody sees themselves walkin' around with no one else. (I said that.)

The Dyer's Garden said...

You do not offer criticism, my dear Daisy, only clumsy abuse, recurring with the tedious regularity of an unloved season. This is because you have no ideas of your own only an ego, and a fragile one at that, for it evidently ventures only online, hidden. Even your latest line you've half-borrowed from me. And you take it all so seriously - there is no doubting your sincerity - your little paws scratching away like some poor jilted lover. We talk here in play - our preoccupation is ludic, yours merely ludicrous; playing with you is like kicking balls into an empty goal.


I come from a community, Mr Mongoose, far poorer than the ghetto-blastered, nike-heeled, ice-bejewelled thugs for the suffering of whose ancestors we must atone - according to Mr Smith - for fucking ever. Yet we did not kill each other for casual disses, treat our women like bitches, or live off the enterprise and thrift of others. That is what I am talking about, not the iniquities of tax law or any of the other irritants of modern life on which everyone here is in agreement.

call me ishmael said...

It is the idea of dis-advantage, mr mongoose, which irks so many, for its recognition marks their own ad-vantage, when they claimed, all along, that their superiority of opportunity was due to merit, industry, bootstrapping; elaborate, if you will, on the history of imbecility point.

"Yet we did not kill each other for casual disses, treat our women like bitches, or live off the enterprise and thrift of others."

This condition, mr TDG, these practices, do not spring, formed, from the womb but are environmentally nourished. Aren't they? Or are blacks just born criminals? And even if they are, how does it further us or them not even to know how to execute them. What dreadful Nirvana do you seek? In your version of social realism, is the agony on the gurney restorative justice, compensatory suffering ? And why is it that you so often chastise a spontaneous human revulsion with a spluttering fusillade of I-Know-Bests ?

I often thank stanislav for his good humour, his untutored, alien indignation but most of all for his affection for, as he might put it, ordinary decent bloke who not up his own arse is.

The Dyer's Garden said...

Are you alright, Mr Smith? It is not like you cheaply to set up straw men. To say that the criminality of some sub-culture or other is not the outcome of "western imperialism" is not to say that it must be either genetic or remediable by state organised killing. Silly, too, to chastise me for an astringency of style, like you are some shrinking violet, all softness and shade.

The point of dwelling on sentimentality is that it is ultimately a fuel for far greater injustices than the ones that prompt it. Communism - for which you have a soft spot, like so many Cambridge undergraduates of your generation - is as eloquently an illustrative case as any.

call me ishmael said...

No, I like your style, it's your substance I query, concentric circles of reasoning, all from a standpoint of superiority, condescension, even. Take, Are you alright, Mr Smith; not quite the Take yer fucking' medication, beloved of those who dwell in the land of Pizza but every bit as peurile.

I know very little of communism, that you deduce from my disquiet at globalisation that I must be, therefore, Marxist, is an erroneous assumption with which I cannot assist.

I travel to England shortly and so if I do not immediately attend to any response you or anyone else makes it will be due to my presence out on that old Highway and not an indication that I demand the last word, such, after all, is the right of my visitors, sentimental old fools as they are.

mongoose said...

Mr DG,

My thought, obviously an ill-expressed thought, was that I constructed a situation where a very poor person breaks the law through desperation and an entirely noble and decent desire to feed her kids. OTOH we have a rich instsitution - an Attorney General, perhaps - breaking a law by employing a person in an illegal way. Criminals both but if I only had one rope, I know which one I would have on a postcard.

I don't give a flying fuck about slavery or the sins of my fathers - and my (our) straitened economic origins are neither here nor there either. One cannot though ignore the roots that brutality and criminality have in poverty. I do not condone anything; I merely describe it. As we step once more off the plank of boom, wait and see what happens to the crime stats in the bust inner cities - Huddersfield and Huston, New York and Newcastle.

Your bejewelled dickheads are bejewelled for a reason; the diss and shoot regime is in place for a reason; the casual violation of women is there for a reason. Life is hard out there; a chap's turf must be protected. A little fear, a little swagger goes a long way. Jack Palance in Westerns of old strutted his stuff with a pair of pearl-handled colts; your eegits parade in their Nikes and whatevers and you just know that they's a-packin' and can put a cap in yo ass, Bro. One doesn't meet many old drug-dealers, does one?

That the justice system in the USA falls more heavily on blacks cannot be argued against with any credibility.

“Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!” cries she
With silent lips. “Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”

Yeah, right. Semper fi.

The Dyer's Garden said...

You've written here sympathetically about Marxism, Mr Smith; great to hear you've now changed your mind.

As for sounding superior, forgive me for concealing my deference to your wisdom so much better than you conceal yours to mine ("talking like a cunt", was your phrase, I think). Anyhow, I wish you a safe journey.

Mr Mongoose, if you really believe that being poor explains or justifies the behaviour of the people in question, when a myriad communities with far less resource and worse prospects show none of its features I am not sure there is anything helpful I or anyone else can say. That your talk is an insult to anyone who - evidently unlike you - has had first hand experience of poverty I'll leave to someone else to point out, perhaps that Daisy girl who can't help writing footnotes to all my footnotes.

mongoose said...

Mr DG, I didn't say any of those things. I didn't think any of those thoughts. One cannot, Sir, just make shit up. I cannot be bothered to respond line by line. I have given you an argument; I cannot give you understanding.

And, by the way, although it is no fucking business of yours, one day when I was a young teenager, I worked out that the reason I rarely saw my mother eating was because she had already fed her food to us. Fortunately for me, the lady - and soon her recovered husband - still had the spirit and generosity to try to give their children a better chance in life than fate had dealt them, you preposterously self-satisfied and deluded cunt. Nobody knows the troubles I seen but I bet yours, you bastard, were worse.

Mr Ishmael, Imbecile - one generally capable of some degree of communication and the performance of simple tasks (under supervision). And I apologise for befouling your blog; do delete this if it offends you. Bon voyage! You be careful among those English.

call me ishmael said...

I have written sympathetically about you, Mr TDG, only recently, and more than once, doesn't mean I believe in you.

Noboody ever taught me, either, how to live out on the street, orphaned, but I found out that I had to get used to it. I don't think I ever said here that I was a boy who got the glittering prizes.

Befoul my blog, mr mongoose ? Now, that would be something.

Thanks, both, for your good wishes.

The Dyer's Garden said...

Then, Mr Mongoose, before we all descend into a pythonian comparison of who lived in the smaller shoebox you can explain why when you were poor you escaped the "reason" you refer to when you say "Your bejewelled dickheads are bejewelled for a reason; the diss and shoot regime is in place for a reason; the casual violation of women is there for a reason." Or did you diss and shoot, bejewelled and bebitched?

mongoose said...

Because I was lucky.

a recurring figure (inverted) said...

23:24

interesting, i spoke recently to 'a natural born beyoncé fan' who was even prepared to express a preference for the taylor swift video - the subject of the whole 'who is the most ephemeral of them all' controversy. is it possible that the loose canon kanye west was not in on the right wavelength? did beyoncé's people perhaps have this awards charade sewn-up from the beginning, but forget to mention this to the accidental angel, mr west, who has blown the gaffe for all the wrong reasons and, embarrassingly, attracted so much attention to dodgy racial sub-motivs playing beneath the arts scene as to warrant presidential involvement in the cover-up?

The Dyer's Garden said...

How deftly you parry, Ishmael. Let's hope you are off to see a publisher.

The Dyer's Garden said...

Mongoose, so that is what our friends are missing: luck. Perhaps it is all that bling - cursed by too much ice.

call me ishmael said...

Why do I need a publisher,Mr TDG, when I have you?

call me ishmael said...

Dear Mr a recurring figure.

Do you think you might re-frame those remarks to someone who doesn't know who or what a beyonce is,please? I know I could google whatever or whoever it is but I am equally sure that your version of it, whatever it is, would be more illuminating and more enjoyable.

bouncé knolls said...

00:25

that was a bitch...and the last time i take pity on another popstar...did you see the way the sulky little schoolgirl milked the situation? see how long it took her to walk up the motherfucking catwalk? did i get to make my charmingly sucrose and endearing acceptance speech? no! i got completely fucking timed-out! she's still out there making capital now, goddamnit! thanks a bunch kanye! money?! charity points?! who gives a fuck! you cost me top-bill limelight you crazy jackass!!!

spark up said...

00:42

mr ishmael, i think i'm right in saying that the moons of beyoncé orbit in a curiously eliptically jiggly fashion around the famous 'bulging eye-ball' planet jay-zee*.

*apparently named after the amateur astronomer who notoriously discovered the moons before the planet itself, without the aid of a telescope, but was a bit too shy to report the results of his observations to the scientific community.

spark up said...

mr ishmael is obviously too busy researching beyoncé's profile to reply. i hope i have been able to assist him in his quest to identify and visualize the motion of heavenly bodies.

jay-zee (a globespotter in an anorak) said...

01:32

although your description of my astronomic investigations is factually correct, i would like to clarify one point: since the date of the aforementioned events, i have found that the use of a telescope affords much better resolution.

as for kanye west: he didn't murder anyone, did he? unlike president obama.

The Dyer's Garden said...

Maybe it is Modo, shame we don't see more of him.

lilith said...

What a fantastic thread! You can find out all about Beyonce, Miss Swift, Mr West and the MTV awards scandal here and here and and here but then again....

call me ishmael said...

Thanks Lilith,

I liked this one (about the Malaysians)

"These vile fascist pigs don't want anyone to enjoy life. Why don't they keep their nasty oppinions to themselves and live and let live."

- Salome, beaconsfield,bucks..

Yes, Salome, and why don't you?

jerky chick said...

00:20

sex-bomb-beyoncé in malaysia smacks of cultural terrorism - although i would guess that her challenging show must also make the principles of fundamental christians stand on end too. does ms knowles really need to spread her pantie-power-message in kuala lumpur to promote herself and world-freedom? or is she just winding up muslims as an ideological favour to her president, mr obama? i mean, let's get this in perspective...how would americans like it were osama bin laden to prance around the stages of the united states dressed only in a sparkly posing-pouch?