Friday, 22 May 2009

WOTSONTELLY, THE TALKING POTATOES

 
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ONE POTATO. IT'S ACTUALLY QUITE NICE THAT PEOPLE COME TO ME FIRST, FOR THE NEWS. IAN HISLOP POTATO


TWO POTATO. ACTUALLY, READERS, THEY GO TO HIM FIRST, GUIDO PIZZA POTATO.



THREE POTATO. BUT FOR THE ARTS THEY COME TO ME, MARK LAWSON POTATO



Mr Ian Potato of the BBC and editor of Private Eye was talking to Mr Mark Potato of the BBC about how much money they both made from the BBC and how that enabled them to be among its fiercest critics.

Great satirists, squeaked Little Potato, pulling one of his funny faces, Ken Livingstone, Boris Johnson, Anne Widdecombe, great people, all of them, and we love to have them on the show, Boris will definitely be back, he’s great to work with. You know, there really is no business like show business.


Yes, I know, squeaked Big Potato, isn’t it great ? Tell me something else that’s wonderful about you.

Well I went to Oxford…..

And..?

Well, that’s it, doncha know.

Ian Hislop, it’s been wonderful sucking your cock.

Yes, I know.

And the cheque'll be in the post, from the license payer.

Yes, I know

And mine will, too.

Yes, I know, great isn't it, money for old rope.


Throughout a nauseating edition of Mark Potato Talks To..... neither of these two BBC/Establishment stooges made mention of the impact on popular political consciousness of the cybersatirists, especially that of Mr Guido Pizza, who has, with huge industry and perseverance, almost single handedly enabled a new, popular, largely unexpurgated people's forum; tumultuous, discordant, angry, profane and scatological. Vital, often chaotic, always irreverent, it is actually to order-order that people go, now, for hard political news; if it is a case of Hislop's weary Private Eye or Fawkes's fierce and urgent Public Eye (www.order-order) there is no contest. The one seeks to educate, entertain and inform and the BBC cabal doesn't.

7 comments:

Rightwinggit said...

Have you got a chip on your shoulder?

call me ishmael said...

Better that than my head up my arse, eh ?

T' old 'un said...

My uncle was a fish fryer and he often ended up with a chip on his shoulder,

Anonymous said...

Now the light has been turned on the MP's who spend our money whats the chance of the BBC coming clean? I read that slimy little twat Hislop trousered £30,000 a show for have I got amnesia for you.Some tart reading the news gets £92,000 a year, fuck me its not as she has to go out and get it just read it. Weather girls, on the top right of the screen how much they get and top right how many cocks they had sucked to get the job to the nearest hundred will do.

Rightwinggit said...

Potato...chip...geddit?

call me ishmael said...

Sorry Mr RWG

My brains was a bit mashed.

"whats the chance of the BBC coming clean?"

If you ask them they say it's commercially confidential, when they demand the license from you, via the Government sponsored thugs at Capita, they say it's the law. Doesn't seem fair that they can demand money with menaces and then not tell you what they do with it because some useless Establishment fraud like, just for instance, Paxman, might be shamed.

Yours is a good point, which e should pursue; the links, however between media and politics are probably so tight as to keep us excluded from the charmed circle.

Rightwinggit said...

I think the papers have got the flavour for it now, there are rumours of FOI's flying about within the NHS, the BBC could be next.