OPERATION HEARTSANMINDS
ALL OVER BY CHRISTMAS
WAS THE OPINION OF MAJOR-GENERAL RUPERT GOLIGHTLY-JOCKSTRAP OF THE QUEEN'S OWN RED TROUSERSTRIPES REGIMENT.
WAS THE OPINION OF MAJOR-GENERAL RUPERT GOLIGHTLY-JOCKSTRAP OF THE QUEEN'S OWN RED TROUSERSTRIPES REGIMENT.
I AM THE VERY MODEL OF A MODERN MAJOR-GENERAL AND WITH MY VERY CAPABLE COLLEAGUE, MR, ER, ER, ER, BRIGADIER MOHAMMED FUZZYWUZZY OF THE AFGHANI MOTORISED SLINGSHIT, SORRY, SLINGSHOT REGIMENT,
(COR BLIMEY, SAHIB, I CAN'T BLOODY WELL WAIT TO HELP YOU KILL MY COUSINS, BUGGER ME, NO, CAN'T BLOOMING WAIT)
WE'LL GIVE THESE DAMN TALIMEN A GOOD SWIFT KICK IN THE PANTS AND BE HOME FOR TIFFIN. STEADY, THE BUFF HOONS.
I WOULD JUST LIKE TO EXTEND MY CONDOLENCES, SAID NATO C-IN-C, FIELD MARSHAL GORDON SNOT,
TO MYSELF IN RESPECT OF MY DEAD BABY AND MY EVEN DEADER ELECTION CHANCES BUT AS WE SAY IN THE ARMY, IT AIN'T OVER 'TIL THE FAT LADY GETS GANGRAPED AND BAYONETTED TO DEATH AND I SUPPOSE IF I WERE TO HOLD MY NOSE AND TREAD IN THE WATERS OF BABYLON, ONE MORE TIME,
(YES, I KNOW, BENT AS A NINE-BOB NOTE, BUT IT'S THE RIGHT THING FOR THE COUNTRY)
THEN SARAH-GEORGE MIGHT BECOME PREGNANT AND WITH ANY LUCK HAVE A TRAGIC MISCARRIAGE IN TIME FOR MAY, SHOULD BE WORTH A FEW VOTES, WHICH IS MORE THAN CAN BE SAID FOR THIS FUCKING STUPID WAR, OUT HERE, IN WOGLAND. AND ANYWAY, IF WE BEAT THEM THERE THEY'LL ONLY COME OVER HERE AND BOMB OUR ASRSES OFF, WELL, NOT OURS SO MUCH, YOURS. THIS IS WHAT I HAVE SAID ALL ALONG, LET THEM SLAUGHTER BRITS OUT THERE AND THEY WON'T NEED TO COME OVER HERE AND DO IT.
I BLAME MY SUBORDINATE, PRESIDENT NIGGERBASTARD, OF THE UNITED STATES. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GIVE PEOPLE CIVIL RIGHTS, THEY ABUSE THEM.
SPEAKING FROM THE GARDEN OF WHAT IS NOW KNOWN AS MICHELLE'S BLACK HOUSE, PRESIDENT OBAMALAMADINGDONG SAID
MY FELLOW MOTHERUCKERS,
LEMME TELL Y'ALL AND ESPECIALLY ALL THE BROTHERS OUT THERE 'STANSIDE, THAT THERE'S TWO KINDA SURGES IN THIS LIFE, THERE'S A ORDINARY KINDA SURGE AND THERE'S A NIGGERSURGE AND WE'S GONNA NIGGER SURGE ALL OVER THEM GODDAMN NIGGERBASTARD RAGHEAD COCKSUCKIN' SONSAFUCKINBITCHES, BLOW THEIR NIGGER ASSES STRAIGHT TO HELL, OR WHEREVER IT IS RAGHEADS GO TO, BET YO' SWEET ASS WE ARE, KEEP THEM HOME FIRES BURNIN', EH, HONEYCHILE?
(COR BLIMEY, SAHIB, I CAN'T BLOODY WELL WAIT TO HELP YOU KILL MY COUSINS, BUGGER ME, NO, CAN'T BLOOMING WAIT)WE'LL GIVE THESE DAMN TALIMEN A GOOD SWIFT KICK IN THE PANTS AND BE HOME FOR TIFFIN. STEADY, THE BUFF HOONS.
I WOULD JUST LIKE TO EXTEND MY CONDOLENCES, SAID NATO C-IN-C, FIELD MARSHAL GORDON SNOT,
TO MYSELF IN RESPECT OF MY DEAD BABY AND MY EVEN DEADER ELECTION CHANCES BUT AS WE SAY IN THE ARMY, IT AIN'T OVER 'TIL THE FAT LADY GETS GANGRAPED AND BAYONETTED TO DEATH AND I SUPPOSE IF I WERE TO HOLD MY NOSE AND TREAD IN THE WATERS OF BABYLON, ONE MORE TIME,
THEN SARAH-GEORGE MIGHT BECOME PREGNANT AND WITH ANY LUCK HAVE A TRAGIC MISCARRIAGE IN TIME FOR MAY, SHOULD BE WORTH A FEW VOTES, WHICH IS MORE THAN CAN BE SAID FOR THIS FUCKING STUPID WAR, OUT HERE, IN WOGLAND. AND ANYWAY, IF WE BEAT THEM THERE THEY'LL ONLY COME OVER HERE AND BOMB OUR ASRSES OFF, WELL, NOT OURS SO MUCH, YOURS. THIS IS WHAT I HAVE SAID ALL ALONG, LET THEM SLAUGHTER BRITS OUT THERE AND THEY WON'T NEED TO COME OVER HERE AND DO IT.
I BLAME MY SUBORDINATE, PRESIDENT NIGGERBASTARD, OF THE UNITED STATES. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GIVE PEOPLE CIVIL RIGHTS, THEY ABUSE THEM.
SPEAKING FROM THE GARDEN OF WHAT IS NOW KNOWN AS MICHELLE'S BLACK HOUSE, PRESIDENT OBAMALAMADINGDONG SAID
LEMME TELL Y'ALL AND ESPECIALLY ALL THE BROTHERS OUT THERE 'STANSIDE, THAT THERE'S TWO KINDA SURGES IN THIS LIFE, THERE'S A ORDINARY KINDA SURGE AND THERE'S A NIGGERSURGE AND WE'S GONNA NIGGER SURGE ALL OVER THEM GODDAMN NIGGERBASTARD RAGHEAD COCKSUCKIN' SONSAFUCKINBITCHES, BLOW THEIR NIGGER ASSES STRAIGHT TO HELL, OR WHEREVER IT IS RAGHEADS GO TO, BET YO' SWEET ASS WE ARE, KEEP THEM HOME FIRES BURNIN', EH, HONEYCHILE?
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