Good evening, this is Huw Welshman here with the Six O Clock News from the PBC and our top story tonight is that a world famous mass murderer, liar, drunk, bully and all-round degenerate fuckpig, Mr Alastair Campbell aka Caring Al, has come out with all guns blazing in an attack against leading British Supermarkets for selling party outfits entitled
Nutter, Psycho Patient and the like.
KILLING WOMEN AND CHILDREN
IS MY BUSINESS, BITCH.
This is totally unfair, growled the repulsive cocksucker, being a nutterbastard, like me, takes years of training, experience and bribes from America. the idea that my profession should be cheapened in this fashion is deplorable and if they don't watch out me and my friend, Cardinal Blair, may well have no option but to call down an airstrike on their homes, killing them and their children, especially their children. That's just the kinda caring guy I am.
Honest to God, you couldn't make this cunt up, not in your wildest, opium-drenched dreams could you imagine Alastair Campbell.