Thursday, 26 September 2013

WOTSONTELLY, PSYCHOBASTARD DAMNS SUPERMARKETS




Good evening, this is Huw Welshman here with the Six O Clock News from the PBC and our top story tonight is that a world famous mass murderer, liar, drunk, bully and all-round degenerate fuckpig, Mr Alastair Campbell  aka Caring Al,  has come out with all guns blazing in an attack against leading British Supermarkets for selling party outfits entitled 

 

Nutter, Psycho Patient and the like.


 KILLING WOMEN AND CHILDREN
 IS MY BUSINESS, BITCH.


This is totally unfair, growled the repulsive cocksucker, being a nutterbastard, like me, takes years of training, experience and bribes from America.  the idea that my profession should be cheapened in this fashion is deplorable and if they don't watch out me and my friend, Cardinal Blair,  may well have no option but to call down an airstrike on their homes, killing them and their children, especially their children.  That's just the kinda caring guy I am.

Honest to God, you couldn't make this cunt up, not in your wildest,  opium-drenched dreams could you imagine Alastair Campbell.

8 comments:

yardarm said...

You really couldn`t Mr Ishmael, he`s out of control, always was. And this clown is given free reign to void his psychological bowels everywhere without being hounded or laughed to silence, over the dossier, Iraq and Kelly.

Alphons said...

I thought he had been sectioned. He seemed to disappear for a while.

callmeishmael said...

The PBC, also, in the form of the wormy Dyke, bowed before him, then and now.More blackmail? Maybe someone should, what's the term, take him out.

the yorkshire slosher said...

for the sake of the children, let's hope that the supermarkets are never allowed to sell halloween costumes called 'bloodlust blair', 'butcher brown', 'smoke-em straw' or 'carver campbell'...

...that really would be an horrific crime, especially if our favourite democratically elected psycho-killers successfully sued for defamation of character and each received 25 grand.

yardarm said...

Just have a feeling with Alky Al he`ll self destruct, collapse under the weight of his own cuntishness and the sooner the better, perhaps hallucinating during a Channel Four interview the shade of Dr Kelly is reaching out to him " Join me, Alastair in my eternal sleep ". With Jug Ears abroad, lying and robbing as usual, Lump Head and Mandelson thankfully invisible he serves as a reminder what a gallery of grotesques concoted New Labour.

There was a story, not much follow up on it, that Rupe was divorcing the gold digger/trophy because he caught her making the beast with two backs with none other than Blair ? Mind you I thought Rupe`s had Blair`s balls in his pocket since day one.

The Pope said...

No doubt they were caught at it in the *missionary* position. *Me rove you rong time!*

tdg said...

Mr Ishmael, can I persuade you to write a play, tragicomically ambivalent in the manner of Measure for Measure? It shall be staged.

DtP said...

Dear Mr Smith

Hope all's alright & shit. Just the voice (it is a bit shite but..)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6drfp_3823I

I genuinely can see Happy Mondays & Daft Punk in there - gotta strain your eyes but....

I very much hope all is well and your pen is rested too. Don't sweat it dude!

DtP