Saturday, 13 August 2011


Professor Doctor David Gay, off the telly.

Look I simply put it to you ....shut up, I'm a famous telly historian, listen to me and you might learn something...I simply say that all black men are gay. David Lammy's a gay black man but in a decent white sort of way.  And all...oh do shut up, I've been on Jamie's Magic School.... and all white men are gay,too.  And all women. Black ones. White ones, gay, all of them . And you, Emily, you too

 Who me?

 Yes, Dearie, you too, no use telling me you're not a carpet muncher, I am a very famous historian and I know these things. Almost everone in history is gay. That Enoch Powell speech, it was Rivers of Sperm you know, originally. Mmmmm.

Are you seriously suggesting that I'm gay, me???

Well, of course you are, it's nothing to be ashamed of, perfectly normal, all important people are gay.

Well, I'll have you know that I am a serious journalist which is why I take every opprtunity I can to show my arse to the viewers, or anyone who'll look, really.

 Yes, of course you do, you silly girl, and that's my point ...and I do wish you'd pay attention....flaunting your arse at complete strangers, millions of them, what could be gayer than that? There,  queer erat demonstrandum, as we scholars say - gays do it standing up. Fancy a cigarillo afterwards?


mrs narcolept said...

He must have been overdoing the hospitality before the programme. I thought at one point Emily was going to smack him in the gob with her clipboard.

I don't remember much about Mr Powell except for one interview in which he kept insisting that something or other was not an elephant.

mongoose said...

Well, I saw that, and that Starkey is, yes, mad but also a clever git who knows exactly what he is saying. He knows that no sentence uttered on the Beeb should have the word "Black" in it, innit. Nevertheless the whole discussion was an exercise in BBC cunthood. They could have ignored the elephant trap and just discussed the man's point - has some strangeness become a norm among a certain section of da yoof, with its own language and behavioural traits? Instead they foolishly chose the ad hominem, and that is something that Starkey has never cared about. He is the Clever Poof at the front showing off. A psychologist would doubtless have a field-day with it all but alas, I find the constant controversy-making just boring now. He does however know lots about the Tudors and that must have been nice for his mum.

The wee nerd, honky boy needs birching. Tedious, self-satisfied, grinning like a piccaninny, I-am-on-the-telly twat. Another half hour of my life I'll not get back.

call me ishmael said...

Mr Powell, the Tories' Philosopher King, was so well-beloved of his countrymen, mrs n, that he was forced to take a seat over there, in Kneecaps Country, County Down, I believe. Perhaps your memory relates to Mr Powell's conjecture that your whoreson Ulsterman politician, say, the Reverend Doctor Ian Paisley, lumbering and trumpeting and knocking down trees with its head bore a resemblance to the great pachyderm, but was not as intelligent.

Whether he was racist or not is a moot point- and in any event, being racist, then, was not the crime which it now is. I think it used to be the case that some parliamentarians saw politics as a continuation of an academic, university career and that probably the worst charge history can lay at Powell is that of thinking out loud, being over-fond of the sound of his own thoughts.

As for poor Emily, I think she practices too many vices to be able to hit anyone with a clipboard.

call me ishmael said...

I agree with all of that, mr mongoose; I couldn't take it seriously, either. But astute readers will have guessed as much.

PT Barnum said...

Dr S. will probably be arrested by appointment and charged with incitement to make all and sundry mouth off intolerably. I did, however, learn something during the frothing outrage he intentionally induced - that the fashion for wearing one's trousers so very very low that they fight a precarious war with gravity is in mimicry of US prison uniforms which are, apparently, most ill-fitting. How ironic, to be clad in honour of the US prison machine while claiming to be freedom fighters for the rights of young black men and their wigger comrades in 'bruv, innit'. Just getting used to the clothes before you're made to wear them, I imagine.

banned said...

PT Barnum, the trousers round the arse thing is to do with not being allowed to wear a belt in US prisons.

I agree with almost all that Starkey had to say except the bit about Enoch Powell not being right since he patently was.

Some arrogant tit at the Beeb thought 'right lets get some silly old right wing academic to say something outrageous on Newsnight then we can all get outraged and pounce on him thus regaining the narrative (I dunno either)'.

Sadly for them Mr Starkey knows his stuff and despite some presentational mistakes stood his ground well.

I was very impressed with the black lady, even though she was wrong kept her composure very well, unlike the shouty white bloke and the biased presenter.