Friday 1 April 2011

THE CASE FOR AY-VEE


I'M GETTING MARRIED IN THE MORNING.
RATHER LIKE THE FUTURE KING IS.
WHAT WITH ME BEING THE FUTURE PRIME MINISTER.

He was about, yesterday, Ed, "launching" "his" " "election" campaign, bringing forward his policies, setting out his stall and Jesus, he was fucking awful.  Choices, he kept saying, and challenges, saying them in that ghastly, gobby style of his, as though he had a cleft palate, and it was  filled with marbles, and he was speaking under fucking water and had a broken bottle up his arse.  Anybody thinking that AyVee is a good idea should just watch a clip of Ed Milliband, Milliband is what AyVee produces.  Shitheads.

As many here have commented, CallHimDave  must laugh himself to sleep at night at what the Labour leader's election system threw up.

10 comments:

a young anglo-irish catholic said...

Tell me, Mr I, does AV mean I have to vote for more than one idiot, even if I don't want to?

I recall doing a bit of digging into the 2004 London Mayoral election and finding 17 percent of first choice votes were binned.

Perhaps Leninspart didn't really win.

Lenin once said 'if voting changed anything, they'd ban it'.

I'm sure Mcintosh of the GLC would agree. After all, Lenin became GLC leader without anybody voting for him...

Verge said...

Yes, the voice: it becomes ut.

Cint.

PT Barnum said...

Three other countries in the whole wide world use AV: Australia, Fiji and Papua New Guinea, and the Australian populace apparently want FPTP. So why bother? Oh sorry, it's a coalition thing, ain't it?

The speech defects of the Labour leadership provide continuity. From Brown's Alky Ada to Miliband's lisping through a swollen thyroid, all that beckons now is Balls and all the anti-stammer techniques he was taught. At least he doesn't sing.

Woman on a Raft said...

At least he doesn't sing.

I'm off down betting shop. Fate listens to things like that and it adores a practical joke.

Who can forget, much as they may wish to, Cherie mangling (if such a thing were possible) "When I'm 64".

C'mon, you just know Ed spent his entire childhood leaping around his 'ampstead bedroom crooning "Tainted Love" in to a hairbrush while David dashed in and out to give him - owww - Chinese burns.

Thomtimth I feel I've got to
Get Away


Quite.

PT Barnum said...

I shall now spend the day with my mind's eye haunted by a hideous chimera of Ed M and Marc Almond (who did at least have svelte hips and no lisp). Shall we take it as mere serendipity that the other half of Soft Cell was called David Ball?

floating voter said...

PT..

" Three other countries in the whole wide world use AV: Australia, Fiji and Papua New Guinea"

Nah you missed out dear old Scotland.
We use it in our council elections. We get about 5 choices and you put 1 to 5 in favour of the cocksniffers you 'like' the most.
The best laugh is that even though a cocksniffer gets most No1 selections it doesn't mean they win. they must get a certain percentage of the mugs votes.
Recently a sitting SNP guy was ill and resigned. His replacement got most No1 selection votes but lost to an independent due to the percentage system. It went down to the wire and selection No5 votes decided it.
You can put only selection No1 vote in and not bother about the other cocksniffers. This is what anyone who knows the system would do but it's not publicised anywhere so people vote for nobs they don't even like in their votes No2 to 5 ! Bootiful.
Oh and don't get me started on the elections to Holyrood. We have STR ( second transfer vote or something). Two votes. One for the sniffer you want locally and one for the sniffer you want in the regional voting system list. The wankers on 'the list' don't even have to get out of bed and meet anyone. They're selected by the parties and given a £62 K job plus expenses. The Greens like this and don't put up any candidates in the real vote.

mongoose said...

We have a three-preference variant of AV here in Bandit Country - for the Town Council. For a long time, one of the local pub characters tried to get on. He was a shambolic, disheveled individual. He ran the local beer festival in the Spring, and was constantly pissed but surprisingly articulate and knowledgable about Da Blues. Christ knows why he wanted to waste his time on the flower-pot committee but it was important to him. Then the great AV day dawned and everybody with an ounce of a sense of humour went down to vote. John "The Dancing Sailor" Smith - can't remember his real surname - first preference. Nobody else got a mention from me but lots of other people had actually heard of him or seen him about and so he got lots of 2s and 3s. In he stormed. Fantastic scenes in the ancient Town Hall as the po-faced other 11 had to sit there as Sailor took his place.

PT Barnum said...

I stand corrected Mr floating voter, although that version sounds like it was invented by a demented committee from Hell. Presumably they stopped just short of including a left-handed/right-handed voter factor and allowing for the phase of the moon.

The list method is obviously the way to go, since it cannot be desirable for those who would master us to actually have to share our germs and leprosy. I got a letter from Milliband Jnr this morning asking for my ideas about what he should do. I'm now wondering what to send back in the envelope.

call me ishmael said...

I trust you will tell him to go, mr ptb, and fuck himself.

mrs narcolept said...

It was Morrissey not Marc Almond that he sang, I would put money on it. Panic on the streets of London.