Friday 30 June 2017

LABOUR'S STARS ASCEND



Jack Dromey, Jeremy Corbyn's Business Seckaterry, welcome to All Out Bollocks, with me, Adam Lard, here on skymadeupnewsandfilth.

Thanks, Adam, good to be here. 
And we're kinda family, you and me.

Oh, how's that?

Well, you're married to Anji Hunter 
 
who was Tony Blair's right-hand woman 
and I'm married to Harriet Soursister, 
 
who wasn't.

Is that why you were parachuted into a safe Labour seat, Erdington,  which was supposed be an all-women candidates list?
 Because you were married-into Labour aristocracy?


I think you'll find, Adam, that it was my credentials as a trade union worker - well,  not exactly worker -  that got me the seat.

 
Well, I am sure there are female trade unionists and the policy was clearly All-Women Shortlists, was it not?

 
 I think you'll find, Adam,  that certain constituencies could be exempted if it was deemed to be in the interests of the Party.

 But it was supposed to be in the interests of the Party and indeed of half of the population for there to be All Women Shortlists, wasn't it? 
  I mean, can you answer the fucking question or not
Why was Harriet Harman's husband forced into a constituency which was supposed to have an All Women Shortlist?
It stinks, doesn't it?

 
Well, not at all, Adam, the Party decided that it was in its interests to have me in parliament, rather than  some foul-mouthed, hairy-arsed  lesbian in a boiler suit, which, let's be frank, most of them then were.  No, I have great respect for people of the LGBTQ persuasion even supporting them myself, online.  Even though I didn't.



From the Beggars' Guardian

 




7:47AM GMT 21 Nov 2013



A front bench Labour MP is under pressure to explain how he has "favourited" gay porn websites on his Twitter account.
Jack Dromey, the husband of Harriet Harman, the Labour Party deputy leader, has blamed the messages on a "technological mix-up".
In September, the shadow policing minister favourited a message about black porn stars having sex.
When he was challenged Mr Dromey, 65, claimed he had accidentally clicked on the message, which included the name “Paris”, while researching a romantic holiday with his wife, it was reported on political gossip website Guido Fawkes.
However, he was left facing further questions when he favourited a second explicit message last week, which showed a picture of two men engaged in a sex act.

No, I would definitely never peruse gay porn sites, Not, as I say, that there's anythuing wrong with gay porn. AS far as I know, never having seen any.
But to come to Brexit, which is specifically in my brief as Business seckaterry. I was a trade union negotiator for thirty years.....


 Before, in an act of monstrous New Labour hypocrisy. you were parachuted into a safe seat by your Mrs......

 
Before I commenced this part of my career in public service.


Well, let's turn to your skills a a negotiator.



Yes, happy to, 'swhere my strengths lie...

 you were only ever negotiating on  behalf of the NewLabour party,  cunts like Mandelstein and Byers and blind Boy Blunkett, people who were more anti-union than Thatcher and Tebbitt and all those spivs, weren't you, not on behalf of your members, you just kept telling them that the main thing was not to upset the fortunes of NewLabour, who, lets face it, couldn't give a  monkey's fuck for the Transport and General Workers Union.  That's what the Warwick Agreement was about, wasn't it, let's all get Tony Blair elected again, so's he can fuck the Labour movement up the arse.


Well, I wouldn't put it quite like that, Adam... 

And since you've been in parliament you have voted consistently for cuts in wages, cuts in public services and massive bonuses for bankers, haven't you?
And now you come on here talking shit about Brexit, talking as though you have a plan, to benefit working people, as if you give a fuck about working people or wimmen, or any other bastard, when all you've done all your worthless life is  betray your class, haven't you?
HAVEN'T YOU?

You've lied and cheated and ponced your way into comfort, security, expense account hedonism, bribes, bungs, pensions and honours whilst the Transport and General Workers Union like that cunt, Johnson's, Post Office Workers Union has been trashed by NewLabour and Tory govaments alike, you' ve used the labour movement to feather your own nest, haven't you?
 

Well, you could at least focus on my administrative skills, Adam, to be fair.


Your what? Your fucking what? 
You were  fucking Treasurer of the Labour Party, another job your Mrs got you, under  Gordon Snot, when he was taking pro-Israeli bribes  from David Abrahams and you claimed to know nothing about it. 
 Fuck all to do with me, you said, and yet you were the fucking Treasurer and your wife was the Deputy fucking Leader.
You're even worse than that fucking jumped-up postman, Alan Johnson,  the famous cuckold, at least when that fuckwit Miliband made him chancellor he admitted he hadn't got a fucking clue, couldn't do his two times fucking table and went out and bought himself a dummies guide to arithmentic.  
 All you could do was say I dunno nuffink about hundreds of thousands of pounds in bribes sloshing around in the funds that you were in charge of.



So, as a union boss you shafted your members on behalf of your wife's boss, Blair; you shit all over the advancement of women in the parliamenmtary Labour party, you voted consistently for cuts in public services, wages and conditions, whilst taking massive salary increases yourself,
you took bungs from lobbyists whilst an MP
 
 and now, full of weasel words and I-Know-Bestism. you wanna shit on the democratic decision of the Euro Referendum.





Well, Adam, I think you'll find.....


Oh, do fuck off, Dromey.
I have to talk to some vermin on this show but you are something else. 
We're going to a short break now, viewers, probably some fucking ghouls talking about cancer and then some adverts for funerals and probably that vile cunt, Parkinson, on how poor people should make provisions for when they die. 
On the bright side  when we come back we'll have had security escort this piece of shit Dromey from the building.
Stay tuned.

33 comments:

Bungalow Bill said...

Where Neil and Glenys led, other honourable socialist couples have diligently followed. I scan those alongside and behind the Blessed Jeremy and have no faith in a new dispensation. Should we old comrades avoid the bourgeois sin of pessimism? Of course we should, but in the matter of a Labour Resurrection I am afraid I cannot - despite the Great Victory in Defeat of 8th June and the sweet dreams of the Children of Glastonbury.

I saw a programme recently on BBC4 about a Japanese family which makes samurai swords and has been doing so for 250 years. That sort of thing is where our bright future can be found.

call me ishmael said...

Yes, I watched that, too, mr bungalow bill, there has been a series of such, at least one series, recently, maybe two. I felt that on the whole they were a love affair with Cherry Blossom Japan, which blinded itself to the purpose of the Samurai and to its flowering in he last war. Leaving that aside, the swordmakers were very engaging, unlike a later pottery-making family; I loved the idea of the sharpener, working eight hours a day for two months, on the same blade, and the sight of the smithy squad folding the steel with sledgehammers, their arms a-tremble. The show about Hokusai, the man who painted the Wave, in the Thirty Six Views of Mount Fuji block print series, was the most rivetting and inspiring of the Jap season, worth looking for, albeit that the most important cultural events which ever occurred in Japan - Hiroshima and Nagasaki - pass unmentioned.

This is as vile a crew of Labour pretenders as I can recall, seeing Dromey whoring his worthless self with Adam Boulton made me retch and rage simultaneously. Umuna, Kendal et al, where do they come from and why don't they fuck off somewhere else?

Bungalow Bill said...

That sharpener, Mr I, that was his whole job and life, or the spine of it. A devotion. I have been reading some of, and about, Michael Oakeshott the late, elusive "conservative" philosopher and one of those on the Tory Right to whom socialists, at least this socialist, can intelligently relate. But he isn't really on the Right at all, he's on the side of human craft, practised humbly for the sake of itself and for each other.

Mike said...

Can't say I'm a Dromey fan, on a scale of 1-10 he's maybe a 7 (where 10 is at the Blair level).

But married to Harriet Hatchetface - and he must occasionally glimpse her stepping out of the shower - entitles the poor bugger to some sort of medal.

Any idea on the title of that sword documentary? Sounds just up my street.

Anonymous said...

Morning, Mr Mike - it's "Handmade in Japan" ep.1 "Samurai Sword." The i-player will probably fuck you off if you try to play content on a machine down-under, but youtube may provide.

cheers

v.//

walter said...

I watched the sword maker, i know im going to sound like a moron, but i wasnt impressed, the
japanese make a song and dance about making a cup of tea! Remember when Diston saws where the bees
knees, now you can buy a razor sharp saw for £8...I worked as a welder for decades and have made several samurai swords and in my opinion the swedes probably made better swords because they had
better raw materials..another you tube vid i think is good Colonial Gunsmith, start to finish the making of a flintlock..... barrel forging ,reaming ,rifling, stock making etc
I wish i was a zen buddhist philosopher.... perhaps when we are cremated we would allow local engineering companies too place steel in the coffin so it would come out case hardened courtesy
of our bones me being green and all that

call me ishmael said...

You are a zen buddhist philosopher if you want to be, mr walter. And given infinity your atoms will eventially inhabit everything that was, is or shall be, although I do like the cremation as foundry idea.

It is, I grant you, an irritating Japaneseism, the fuss they make of everything, although not of their prisoners, obviously; the tea ceremony and so on can drive one barmy but it is the the practised ritual, the dutiful observation, where, as mr bungalow has it, the performance of the task - even for its own sake - is the spine of the life, it is such things which separate us from the New People. I was using a Jap saw a few minutes ago, a little one, the equivalent of a Gentleman's saw, wafer thin, and once you remember to pull and not push its cut is effortless and laser-like, two or three pulls, where a tenon saw would require a dozen or more

Those eight quid saws are fantastic., I have a Spear and Jackson one at the moment and am very content with it, despite having longed for one of those old ones, with the wooden handle and the teeth which need to be re-set almost everytime five minutes. If I can ever finish my workshop I will try my big Jap saws, although, given the number of powered saws I have, using a Jap saw would only be for the experience,, the practice and eventually the ritual, which is where we came in.

call me ishmael said...

I am sure you would be rivetted to some of these Jap craft shows, mr mike, especially since they aspired to be your masters, recently. The Zero fighter aircraft seems to be their only outstanding technology of WW2 and it was soon overtaken by US fighters; if they had concentrated a bit more on technology and a bit less on Samurai and Bushido ritual who knows what would have happened; the finest Samurai sword, and I am prepared to believe they are a thing of wonder as well as savagery, is, challenged by a Thompson sub-machinen gun, good for fuck all.

Are they lynching the Noncing Monsignors, yet,down there? High time they did.

mongoose said...

There is in my workshop a little corner with half a dozen saws in it. They are awaiting resetting and sharpening. I am forever moving the bastards out of the way to somewhere which will be in the way tomorrow. I fear that although I have the kit and the knowledge and that this sharpenign would be a useful task, it will never happen. They are nice saws that I got off my dead dad but I cannot be arsed with the palaver frankly.

I bought a few years back three of the japoanese pull-saws - 20", 15" and 9" or thereabouts. Cheap ones with plastic handles - just to see. The smaller two are double-edged with different sizes of tooth. I almost never use anything but the smallest one and the finer tooth. As you say, mr i, afer-thin but it cuts anything. Neatly, cleanly, squarely, quickly. I was using it to cut fucking fencing for the vegetable patch just the other week. I have never sharpened it either, and the teeth are far too fine to try. I think the set of them cost me twenty quid or so. And I don't think that they have ever been to Japan either.

I will look for the sword-making geezer on the iThing.

Anonymous said...

WW2 innovations: I think the Japs knew about the jet-stream before anyone else. (An American bomber-pilot was almost court-martialled for turning back when he realised he was running out of fuel having made little progress in a high-altitude run towards the target.) If I'm remembering this correctly, they rigged explosives to small sturdy balloons and sent them off up in the jet-stream towards the West Coast; thousands of the fucking things, most of which did fuck-all for one reason or another. However, the only mainland American WW2 casualties were a pregnant schoolteacher and five children aged between 11 and 14 who came across one of the last of these jet-stream balloons in Oregon when they'd gone to a beauty-spot for a picnic.

v.//

call me ishmael said...

I blame mr bungalow bill; a rant about the vile Dromey turns almost into a meditation on saws. From my reading of professor McLuhan's writings on media I learned that the rock amplifies the fist, the wheel amplifies the foot, the blade and spear amplify the tooth and nail and that the fire and frying pan amplify the stomach and so on, that all technologies are an amplification of an existing human sense or ability; the saw has its origin in the picking-up of a toothed jawbone and its deployment as a sawing tool, hence the "teeth" of a saw. There are worse things upon which to ponder than the origin of tools. But he's still a cunt, Dromey. I never blamed Harriet Harman for being Lord Longford's niece; I met him and spoke to him a few times and he was a decent human being, but even if he hadna been, Harman can't help who her uncles are. There is a tradition in which well-bred gals take up the cudgels on behalf of the unwashed, Elizabeth Fry and some of the Cadbury girls come to mind, that Harman fell foul of Blair & Co is probably to her credit but her efforts, with Patsy Leatherface Hewitt to liberalise the paedophilia laws and her shameles promotion of her husband's interests, contrary to her cultivated persona of a Women's rights activist are quite revolting, as bad as phony lefty, Diane Abbott's, sending her son to private school, as far away as possible from her constituents. Abbott is one of the reasons that Corbyn will not swing a majority his way, he needs to sack her, she's as much a hypocrite as Mrs Askey and even stupider.

I am sick of hearing thieving cunts like Mr Harman prattling abour isms and ists, there's only one community, only one enemy; when you hear the IRA pontificating about gay marriage, you know the rights game is up.

call me ishmael said...

Yes, mr verge, probably more attuned to the nature of the Pacific than most, they did that balloon thing but it was hopeless; the great brains were the Hermanns, the V2 went to the Moon, didn't it, more or less, carrying Neil Armstrong? And Ike, conquering Germany, was astonished by the autobahns, at a time when the US had dirt tracks, Germany inspired his post-war presidential programme to build the Interstates and everything that straddled them and flowed from them. Jack Dromey, on the other hand, is good for fuck all.

Oldrightie said...

surely all decent people want the best for everyone but also we all need to earn our place. Just to be fucking born surely is not all it takes to be a human being? Indeed my take on the modern world is all you need to do is beg off others. If your country is up the creek, bugger off. If that means leave your women and kids to their fate, so what? Particularly if you get a billionaire's flat in Kensington cos you torched your own slum, rat infested hovel.

Mike said...

Thanks, Mr Verge, I watched that sword documentary on youtube. Hard to warm to the Nips, but you have to admire their respect for tradition. Its quite a feat to make something like that from the elemental forces - fire, water etc.

Reminds me of an MGB I had in the 70s. Shit made car by Red Robbo and this mates, but with a half-inch spanner and a screwdriver it was possible to transform it into something reliable.

Mr I: re the Noncing Monsignors, you may have seen the news? A Govament enquiry has been working for some years to get to the bottom of this (apologies). The latest scalp is Cardinal Pell, once touted as a possible pope, just charged.

http://www.smh.com.au/comment/fitz-20170630-gx22lk.html

mongoose said...

What we hate about politicians is the letting go of normal life. A perfectly understandable and good reason turns into a convenience because "I am inportant" turns into entitlement because I am grown fat and slick with power turns into just swinehood.

The Harperson is a fairly tedious I-know-bester and to be frank I can't be bothered to think about her. Dromey otoh is a talentless parasite who thinks he deserves something other than a good kicking. These are definitely only C-grade scum though. They are nonentities to be ignored until the revolution. Then they'll be on the third week's guillotine list along with the bankers and the media hacks. Blair will be Monday morning bright and early and the Kinnocks Monday afternoon. Life is too short to worry about the Dromeys of this world.

What the fuck are we going to do about Chuckles Umana? It's going to be a battle between Chuckles and the Owen Jones boy in 2025. And I have a dead cat a yard deep in the garden with more political insight than the pair of them put together.

mongoose said...

And I will just say "boundary changes". Has everyone forgotten but me?

Mike said...

PS while searching for the samurai sword doco I came across a Korean arrow maker - if anything, more remarkable. Hard to believe anyone would fire one of those arrows away.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VK5INvoNTdk

Added bonus for you chaps into saws - a saw makes a brief appearance.

PPS - getting harder to prove I'm not a robot.

Anonymous said...

The Japanese used to make swords for NCOs from the mid-1930s to the end of WW2. Stamped from sheet metal then tempered, they had aluminium or copper handles whic were stamped to mimic the traditional item.
As a weapon and item of uniform it was effective and inexpensive.
On paper an item can be useful without thousands of expensive man-hours being consumed on it.
Who wouldn't want a hand-made sword or the expensive watch? But who wouldn't rather have an equivalent that they won't miss if it gets broken?
And that's the point. Japs keep their values and monoculture but the West doesn't.
Which is why Japan is full of Japanese who sell us saws that cut, motorbikes that win races, and who tut and look at their watches if their train is more than thirty seconds late.
-richard



call me ishmael said...

I suppose what bugged me about Dromey, mr mongoose, was that Adam Lard DIDN'T put to him any of the points I made about his nefarious history but simply treated him as a decent human being. They'd sup with Hitler, these MediaMinster vermin.

call me ishmael said...

I don't know what caused the fire in Kensington, mr old rightie and I doubt if we will ever be told. Can a fridge really cause that sort of inferno?

I don't know where all these people come from, although I suspect there is much in what you say about the nomadic entitlementista, but none of that excuses the fire hazards, nor their authors, and it does appear that residents raised safety concerns and were, for their pains, threatened with eviction; this is intolerable and people should be jailed, even be there not one indigent in that place, even if every one of them meets your freeloader criteria. BoJo, Osborne, wotsisname, that gabshite, Livingdtone, that arse from the council, I'd put them up against the wall, motherfuckers, and shoot them, pour encourager les autres.

Tell you what though, I'm getting rid of the chest freezer just the same, and maybe the fridge-freezer, too.

call me ishmael said...

That's right, mr richard, I have had a Rolex and a series of Swatches and the Swatch is the better timepiece, a better design, more reliable and as you say, junkable. I sometimes think that Rolex and Omega only exist as an earner for Roger Federer and the like, I mean, who would want one, heavy, vulgar and unreliable, as they are? Sheikhs like them, don't they, they like everything vulgar an ostentatious, have you seen the new Bentleys?

It has been a constant thread of these commentaries, the doing of stuff, for its own sake but your last paragraph summarises the pursuit of Quality better than I have ever managed to do.

call me ishmael said...

What struck me about the swordsmiths, mr mike, was that they only receive orders for two or three a year, making cutlery the rest of the time; that must be hard.

He looks and sounds like a wrong 'un, that guy Pell; may he dull the sanctimonious lustre of wotsisname, Pope Frankie de los Fray Bentos and his recent predecessors.

i saw just a few minutes of Broken, a week or two back, Sean Bean giving a surprisingly deft performance as an RC priest tracking-down a teacher-priest who had abused him in childhood, hairy stuff. Bean's character, whilst You-Dirty-Bastarding the elderly miscreant was still able to forgive him. I guess that's the essence of the RC brand - BMW has build quality, Kentucky Fried Chicken has finger-lickability, Beanz Means Heinz and the Global Noncing Corporation of Rome has Forgiveness; what a business that is.

Sorry about the security checks, nothing I can do about it.

call me ishmael said...

Maybe, given everything else which is happening, manifesto-wise, mr mongoose, the opposition will be able to scream and hiss the boundary changes into the long grass.

I htink Umuna is just too superficial, even for the New People; MediaMinster loves him because he's a most acceptable black face, but most will despise him.

Mike said...

Isn't Chukka a white - not really a black, despite the skin tone? He ticks a few boxes, with a girly voice as well.

call me ishmael said...

Yes, he's not even as black as Lord Sir Trevor Philips is and I'm blacker than that. I really would love to see some righteous, angry blacks in parliament, saying OK, 'slike this, see, just for starters, me an' me bredren, we 'ave all de money wot is currently in de hands of Tate and fucking Lyle, de SlaveSugar fellas, innit, an' den we 'ave all dem posh 'ouses, in Glasgow, wot is owned by descendants of de slave trade innit, an' Bristol, too, an' Liverpool, an' like brother mongoose and 'im guillotine list, dat is just for dis mornin'; dis afternoon we come for de Stock Exchange, but no, instead we get Diane Abbott, only in it fot herself,and Chukka; a parliament of Uncle Toms and house niggers, oh, yes, and good old Benjy Zephaniah, peddling hisd watered-down rubbish, Benjy, to proper black issues what the PBC's Mark Steele is to socialism.

Anonymous said...

Speaking of arrows - I expect you'll have seen this before, Mr Mike, but if not, 6 minutes worth spending:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEG-ly9tQGk

An odd fish, to be sure, but remarkably deft.

v.//

Bungalow Bill said...

Fascinating those films, Mr Mike and Mr Verge. There is, then, a link after all: my own rapid archery skills have waned but there must be someone on here who could get into the Lincoln Green and set about the Dromeys and their kind.

Dick the Prick said...

Dear Mr Smith

Wonderful to see you back. Missed you hugely.

I'm still trying to work out how come HS2, Hinkley C and Trident brings down the debt but I ain't hear no blues yet. May QE don't rhyme with stuff.

£1 billion quid to continue the Good Friday Peace Accord? For once i'm on the side of the bureaucrats - cheeky fucking gits - speak Pikey in every school even though they don't - hmmm...

Cheers

DtP



mongoose said...

My da spoke the gaelic, so he did, and the phrase I most often heard him say translated as "one cockroach will attract another cockroach". I think he had it spot on the nose. There is more of Ireland in my toenail clippings than there is in the Good Friday Agreement and all of its bastard offspring.

The nonsense of politics is now getting wearing. The dissonance between what we are supposed to think, what the media says we think, what it is acceptable to think, and what we are actually thinking is about to go tits up. The politically spastic media is, I think anyway, making the fallout of what is about to happen even worse.

call me ishmael said...

We have discussed archery here, previously, mr bungalow bill, Zen in the Art of..... and as a means of legal self-defence, against the nomadic caliphate, the New People or the cops, whoever. The Welsh-English longbowman's ghost must be shrivelled at the thought of languid French bureaucrats threatening to punish us for our independence of thought. To quote the Brummie sage-patriot, Sir Digby Sweat, two eords for the French: Agin Court.

call me ishmael said...

You failed, mr dick, to pay proper attention to prime minister Gordon Snot, when he explained to us that money for wars, weapons and nuclear power plants isn't like other money, it's Contingency Money, from out of the Contingency Vault, a vault which never empties but cannot be withdrawn-from for silly things, like wages, or houses or health care.

Here, a full tenth of a per cent of the populace speaks Pikey and just under one per cent have expressed an interest in learning so to do and yet millions of infratsructure pounds are spent on broadcasting the filthy fucking doggerel and on road, street and public building signage.

I am disgusted, incidentally, at Manchester University - is there such a thing ? - for engaging the services of the infamous Russian-funded Bukkake Boy, George Osborne; have they no shame, the universities, is celebrity everything. Poor old Germain Greer, at least she's half-way educated, and she gets banned by the LGBTQers - who actually owe her more than they can imagine - Osborne, on the other hand, the Bankers' Fellatrix is hailed by Northern Academe.

call me ishmael said...

Was there a time, mr mongoose, when the involvement of the Press, didn't make matters worse? They are vermin, aren't they, the proprietors, editors and hacks, and always have been; some, the odd one, has a pleasing sensibility and a graceful turn of phrase but they are no worse and no bettter than any whore walking the street, well, probably quite a bit worse. Would we, for instance, have had the First and thus the Second World War had the Press not been owned by arseholes?

Anonymous said...

Thanks indeed.
I also used to own three expensive watches, a Fortis pilot's watch, a limited edition RLT and a Zenith. The Zenith I dropped onto a tiled floor at the swimming pool and it broke.
I sold the other two and now wear Casio's cheapest digital watch, the F91. Now I own the watch, not the other way round, there is the beautiful absence of concern on the occasions when it falls or gets scratched.
I remember going to Scotland on my £120 East German motorcycle and watching a guy with a new Triumph literally dancing round his bike in an agony of fear lest it be scratched by the crew strapping it to the deck.
I've since philosophised about this and with a few exceptions - tools, shoes, etc - have gone the Way of the Bic or, as with the watch, the nearest equivalent.
A serviceable pen, lighter, and razors for a month's use for fifteen minute's pay.
And my current bike, a scooter, cost a measly £50 which is probably less than the equivalent weight of firewood. A piece of crap? It's faster than a racehorse.
-richard