THE RETURN OF ESKIMO NELL.

Oh, happy day, Sarah Palin is back. 

 I remember lolling out-loud, month after month, at Obama, Codger McCain and  the Alaskan SoccerMum 


Putin?
 Shit, boy, I can see his ass from my back porch, 'cross them straits, what they called, agin, StraitsaDover, is it? 

whose son  is called Track
  

 -  the other one's called Trig 

 

- and who, after being attacked by animal rights activists over this family pet  photo,

uttered the funniest thing I ever heard from a politican, 
saying: 

 "If any vegans came over for dinner, I could whip them up a salad, then explain my philosophy on being a carnivore: 

 If God haddena wanted us to eat animals he woodena made them outa  meat "

Please, God, if it's not Bernie Sanders,  let these two be President 

and Veep

And let Eskimo Nell come to Scotland, best part of England,  at her boss's  behest, hunting our own po-faced midget horror, Gnasher.

 Scotland's first fetish minister, Naughty Miss Gnasher, models her husband's favourite night attire.

What?  Alec Salmond cosying-up tae yon Donald Trunp?

Never, that's just pure Project Fear, that is, naysayin' from yon Tory scoundrels. 

 Anybody who disnae vote SNP is a Tory Scoundrel.

The former first minister never had nothing tae do wi'  the racist, Donald Trump,  


much less allow him tae bulldoze a world heritage site and bully, abuse and evict decent people who'd been livin' there fer ages; 
 nae,  that was yon Tories, 

This from Alex Massie in the Spectator, recently:

The tick-tock went like this:

Thursday 29th November 2007, Aberdeenshire council’s infrastructure committee dismissed Trump’s application.

Monday 3rd December, the Trump organisation decides not to appeal the decision.

Also on Monday 3rd December, Alex Salmond meets Trump’s representatives in Aberdeen. Salmond, the local MSP, also calls the Scottish government’s chief planning officer.

Tuesday 4th December, Scottish government calls in the application, citing “issues of importance that require consideration at a national level”. The precise nature of these issues is never made clear. Nor is it ever made clear why a still-live planning application needed to be decided by central government before local government had even finished with it.

To no-one’s surprise, however, the Scottish government gives the plans two big thumbs-up. Trump will build two golf courses, a couple of dozen ‘executive villas’ and 950 holiday homes. As Salmond says: “I mean, 6,000 jobs across Scotland, 1,400 local and permanent jobs here in the north-east of Scotland – that’s a very powerful argument which outweighs the environmental concerns.” 

[Actual number of homes built, as of 2015: zero. Number of jobs created: fewer than 200. Hmmm.]

Still, back then Trump had the measure of Alex Salmond: “He’s an amazing man. […] I know for a fact that he – and anyone else who’s representing Scotland, unless they’re the enemy – wants billions of pounds to come into Aberdeenshire and Scotland.”

an' as fer yon oil business, 

he very firmly predicted that the price would fall by seventy five per cent 

but that it wouldnae matter because an independent Scotland  could support itself on, well, widdever he said it could, aye, up in the sky, 

aye, wi' the fairies. 
All lies, this talka an oil price crisis.

SNP referendum oil figures '13 times higher than reality'

New figures published by the Office for Budget Responsibility show the North Sea is only expected to generate £600 million next year, compared to the SNP's prediction of £7.9 billion.

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The SNP's White Paper on independence predicted oil revenues of up to £7.9 billion next year Photo: Getty Images

By Simon Johnson, Scottish Political Editor

6:59PM GMT 18 Mar 2015

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481 Comments

The extraordinary extent to which the SNP inflated North Sea oil revenues during the independence referendum has been disclosed by official figures predicting they will be more than 90 per cent lower than the Nationalists claimed.

The impartial Office for Budget Responsibility (OBR) dramatically revised down its predictions for how much oil and gas will generate for the rest of the decade, projecting the sector will only generate £600 million in 2016/17.

But the Scottish Government’s White Paper on independence predicted that between £6.8 billion and £7.9 billion would flow into the public purse in that year, when the SNP said Scotland would become independent, up to 13 times more.

Alex Salmond and Nicola Sturgeon also promised referendum voters that another “oil boom” was on the horizon, but the OBR said revenues are set to fall to 0.05 per cent of national wealth in 2015/16, the lowest figure in 40 years.

Although the sharp drop is partly thanks to the collapse in the oil price, which happened after the referendum, the OBR also pointed to high operating and investment costs and declining production.

The Unionist parties said the projections badly damaged the Scottish Government’s economic credibility and they demonstrated that a Yes vote last September would have meant billions of pounds of public spending cuts.

Annual North Sea revenues are not expected to increase above £800 million for the rest of the decade but oil would need to generate around £8 billion per year – ten times as much – to maintain currently spending levels in a separate Scotland.

But what is important tae Scotland is not the Aberdeen people sufferin' a Clearance,  like the last, but this time at the handsa their ain first minister, an' it's nae the lossa  thousands  a jobs. Whit's pure important is that lotsa my voters're mooslims, and Mr Trump has said harsh things aboot them, aye an' some a my MPs'er Muslims, too, an this is their chance tae talk shite, doon there, in MediaMinster, jus' like they give a fuck. 

But whit aboot if he did become first minister of America? Whit aboot if he poot a cripplin' an' prohibitive tax on Scotch whisky, an' Harris Tweed jackets an' smoked salmon? Well, first of all there's no way he would be elected, aye, like there was no way the oil price could ever possibly fall, and second, if he is elected and does all them things, well, that'll be, like everthin' , the faulta them Tory parties and they'll have tae pay us more money, in Scotland.  Aye, it's either that or the fairies.

Mr and Mrs WellyFetish, £250k a year, plus exes, pensions, cars travel homes and food.

Disnae matter tae me and Mr Gnasher, we're minted, so we are, pure minted.

Oil revenues ninety per cent lower than they insisted they would be and what we get is wellies and radio shows.
Trump, racist;  and how would we describe the Tribesmen, festering in hatred of fifty-five million of their next-door neighbours?

Crooks, liars, bullies and fools and they have the gall to lampoon Trump.