Monday, 5 July 2010

HALITOTIC FREAK VANDALISES SCHOOLS.

IT CAME FROM OUTER SPACE

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I AM SPIT-GOVE. SMELL MY BREATH.
MMMMM, FOUL, ISN'T IT. AND RANK.
MRS GOVE AND THE JUNIOR GOVES LOVE IT.
HOT AND HORRIBLE, IN THEIR FACES.
SPERMY AND BOWELLY AND GARLICKY.

No, I know best; no, really, I do. About everything. Please, be quiet and listen to me. No, really. And as Mr Liam Byrne said,  there is no money left. and though he was only joking, we are basing our whole wretched, punitive ideology on his one throwaway remark;  that's how clever we are. And it shows how clever we think you are, doesn't it, every time we use it as an excuse for some wholly unnecessary cruelty.

We are having to close the schools building projects because we need the money to bribe people with the new free schools for fuckwit pushy parents, the ones who think they are clever but are just greedy and stupid and say clearly a lot. you know, the ones who were Blairite, afew years back, idiots. They won't actually be free, the schools,  the money will come from the poor people,  the ones with stupid children -  although, I must say, given the current, national appetite for brutality it seems that everybody's stupid. And we need to punish the teachers because some of them didn't vote for us. And that's what democracy's all about. Nasty, vindictive, little  cocksuckers. Like me.

 Mr Michael Spit-Gove.
In his bob-a-blowjob days.
He knows best.

5 comments:

mongoose said...

Gove is a horrible little fucker, isn't he? I used to read his crappy articles in The Times. Just a ghastly bastard, an I-am-almost-too-clever-to-be-true-aren't-I runt. Then some poor woman married him, he spawned and we had to hear the Govian Dada Stories. Call Social Services on the swine.

yardarm said...

His ambition creeps around him like the graveyard mist from a Hammer Horror.

call me ishmael said...

Never too sure about these things but I think he just got spitroasted on Newsnight with Emily, Mr Blinky Balls being the other, less potent, participant.

Shame you can't see Jock Newsnight because some SNP biddy just tore a new arsehole for a ghastly smug LibDem foot soldier fronting Nicky's reforms North of the Border. Michael something, missed his name but I am sure Big Al Carmichael, the Turncoats' Chief Whip, will be giving him a few strokes and confining him to the dungeon in future.

PT Barnum said...

Clowns to the right of me, jokers to the far right... I find myself in the middle of the river, gazing back with incoherent rage whenever Balls, Brown or ANother of the gobshite opposition (sic) appear in my eyeline, or forward with dread and quietly boiling anger at a future where SpivsUHate and upemselves numpties like Gove call down damnation on the heads of those who can't ride a bike, or run a bank, or phone Daddy to save themselves.

Avant le deluge, mes amis....

With God on our side said...

We must have been awful sinners.